Operation SEPARATION
by Afalstein
Summary: There are many Operations that never make it to broadcast. Here is the story of the untold war between the Pirates and the Spinachians, the struggle of 2x5, the unknown crisis. Takes place between SPINACH and GIRLFRIEND. Now complete.
1. Split Sessions

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* * *

Operation: **SEPARATION**

**S**eafaring **E**nemies a **P**roblem, **A**ntagonism **R**esults in **A**ssigments for **T**roubled **I**nplanted **O**peratives, **N**ot good.

* * *

"So how come you gotta just call Numbuh 5 and Numbuh 2 up here to talk to you?" The African girl flicked her long pontytail aside and glanced at the Supreme leader from beneath the depths of an overgrown red cap.

"Just bear with me here, Numbuh 5." 362 paced over to the desk and pressed a button. "Send Numbuh 20,000 to my office with the package." She turned back to the irate agent. "You and Numbuh 2 were ordered here because of your respective… unusual field history."

"An' what does that to do with anythin'?" Numbuh 5 snapped. "None of us have been on any mission's except what the team has been. That's how sector's work, ain't it?"

"Yes… ideally." Numbuh 362 nodded. "However, in a team, there will inevitably be some who gain a specialization that the others will not have."

"Just what are you talking about, sister?" Politeness was no more a trait of Abby's than deference. "Numbuh 5 never did like all this dodging about. Nothing ever gets done."

Numbuh 362 chuckled. "You better be thankful you're not up in higher command, then. Ahem." She coughed. "Very well. In brief."

* * *

"A coastal attack?" Numbuh 2, or Hoagie as his friends called him, frowned skeptically. "Aw, come on, Numbuh 86, how bad could it be? We don't even have all that many treehouses near the waterfront."

"That's what you'd think, BOY!" The global tactical commander clicked some buttons on the desk in front of her. "Yoou wouldn't remember little things like Sector H in Hawaii, or the undersea lab base, or even the Arctic Training base!"

"They got the Artic base?!" Numbuh 2's eyes widened in shock. "B-b-but how? I mean, why weren't we notified, or…"

"Shut up!" Numbuh 86 screamed. "No, of course they didn't get the Artic base, you stoopid boy! But it was a very near thing, and our operatives were hard pressed to hold them back. Our scientists think they may be planning to use a vast quantity of salt to melt the ice surrounding the training base."

"And once that happens, we'd be dead in the water." Numbuh 2 responded. "Hah! Get it, dead in the water?" He winced at the glare he received. "Okay, okay. Sheesh. So what does this have to do with me?"

* * *

"A good question." Numbuh 362 turned around thoughtfully. "First, let me say, that we're not exactly sure who attacked us."

"What?!" Numbuh 5 frowned. "You're trying to tell Numbuh 5 that we just had an attack on the second most important installation in all of the Kids Next Door, and we don't even know who it was?"

"The situation is complicated." Numbuh 362 pressed a button, and a picture of the artic base popped up onscreen. Explosions were everywhere, operatives were running all over the place, and two dark, fuzzy shapes could just be seen on the horizon.

"These are our attackers." Numbuh 362 pointed. "They didn't show up on any of our scanners, they were too low for radar, and it was a foggy night, so we couldn't get a good visual. The question we can't figure out is why they didn't come closer."

"Maybe they figured they could pound us just as well from there." Numbuh 5 suggested.

"Maybe. But Intelligence has another theory." There was a buzzing noise and Numbuh 20,000 walked in, holding a metal tube. "Evidence recovered suggests there were two parties. They must've planned separate attacks on us and accidentally planned an assault at the same time."

"Numbuh 5 thinks that's an awfully big coincidence."

"Probably." Numbuh 362 took the tube from 20,000, who saluted and stood at attention. "But it's the only theory we have. Anyway, they probably got confused and started firing at each other. Once they realized their mistake, they gave up and sailed off." Numbuh 362 stepped forward and shook her finger in Numbuh 5's face. "The only reason this attack failed was because our enemies made a mistake and started fighting each other. If they decided to team up to take us down… well, you can guess what would happen."

"So who are these guys, anyways?" Numbuh 5 was exasperated by all the talk.

"That's where you come in." Numbuh 362 opened the tube and slid the contents into Numbuh 5's hand. "We think you may have experience with him."

Numbuh 5 looked at the item in her hand.

It was a burpleberry sucker, covered in red, sticky hair.

* * *

"Oooookay, this is starting to make more sense." Numbuh 2 was staring at the screen. "But Stickybeard's never used salt before. He hates the stuff."

"Obviously!" Numbuh 86 shoved him aside and started tapping some more keys. "But since your _stoopid_ leader did that _craaazy_ stunt with the pretzel chamber, his cannonballs are coated in the stuff. All he has to do is shoot, and the ice starts to melt. And nobody's going to eat their way out of this gum."

"No kidding." Numbuh 2 agreed. "Salty bubblegum? Bleah!"

"WILL YOU STICK TO THE POINT!?" Numbuh 86 screamed at him. "He could incapitate half of the Kids Next Door! We don't have the resources to deal with this kind of weaponry!"

"Okay, Okay!" Hoagie backed up a few steps, trying to escape the furious female. "So it's dangerous! All we have to do is figure out how to neutralize the stuff! Have you tried pepper spray?'

"In case ya forgot, you stoopid boy, we still have the other enemy to discuss." The screen flickered spasmodically and came to life, showing an interior view of the Artic base.

Hoagie squinted. "Ooh! A salad garden! When did we get that? Is Numbuh 60 starting jungle training sessions?"

"Stoooooooooooooopid boy!" Fanny screamed. "We don't have _vegetables_ in the Artic training base! The recruits would die of fright. We_ train_ them to face that kind of thing!" Fanny clicked some more buttons, showing other parts of the base. Artic prison. The code module. Training area. All of them covered in leafy, green foliage.

"Some kind of projectiles penetrated the ice wall." Fanny sniffed at the sight of the vegetable infestation. "No one paid much attention, but when they came back, they found this. The projectiles must've been some kind of seed." She turned away from the screen, visibly stricken. "The artic base is completely out of commission. Half our recruits are traumatized. We can't access a third of our vessels there. If they attack again we won't hold them."

"Numbuh 86…" Hoagie looked at the global tactical officer, shocked by her sudden loss of bravado. He moved forward, but she brushed him off, walking over to the control panel. She typed in some commands, and a small tube popped out of the console. Labeled on it in large black letters were the words **Toxic Material: Sooper Yucky Stuff**.

"Some of our Dorky-Boy scientists are working on cleaning up the contamination." She said, handing him the tube. "They sent us this sample of the plant infecting the base."

Numbuh 2 popped off the top of the tube and glanced inside.

Spinach.

* * *

"Your sector's dealt with this material before, yes?" Numbuh 362 cocked an eye at Abby.

"Get this stuff away from Numbuh 5!" Abby hastily tossed the tube back to the Soopreme Leader. "Yeah, Numbuh 5 and her friends had to handle a little conquest by some whackos who wanted to spread this stuff. But Numbuh 2 took 'em down and signed a peace treaty with them. They ain't been no further trouble."

"Did they say anything about stopping their invasions?"

Numbuh 5 thought a moment. "Yeah. They said 'we shall not try to take over Gallagher elementary and force little kids to eat disgustin' green leafy things.' Numbuh 5 wuz there."

362 sighed. "And none of you thought to tell them to stay away from the Kids Next Door?"

Numbuh 5 rubbed her chin. "No."

362 groaned and clutched her forehead.

* * *

"That probably wasn't a smart idea, was it?" Hoagie eyed the raging fury at the control console.

"SMART IDEA? You _Stoooooopid_ boy!" Fanny screamed. "That was one of the most _careless_ oversights you could_ possibly _have made! At the very least, ya coulda thought to warn them, or put some kind of clause against future oppression, or somethin' of that nature!"

"I didn't think of it before!" Hoagie whined, crouched over, head in hands. "I'm not very good with treaties and stuff like that!"

"_ANY_one with_ half_ the experience you have should know better than to leave an enemy unchecked!" Fanny stormed about. "Now we're dealin' with brussel sprouts in the Training Base and a pending invasion, because of _your_ mistake!"

"Hey!" Hoagie dared an angry glimpse back up. "If it hadn't been for me, the rest of Sector V would still be trapped in that school, getting dunked in spinach and having to listen to dorky sing-and-dance numbers."

"It woulda served ya right!" Fanny shrilled into his face. "When I talk to your leader, I'm gonna have a _lot _to say about this slip-up!"  


* * *

"I'll have to talk to Numbuh 1 about enemy protocols." 362 seemed thoughtful. "It's not like him to miss something like that."

"Aw, Don't be too hard on Numbuh 1, sister." Abby was very protective of her sector leader. "He wuz under a lotta stress at the time, and we wuz happy just to get them crazy nuts outta there."

362 nodded. "True. Still, I'll talk to him about it."

Numbuh 5 shook her head, but let the subject drop. "What I still don't get is why you called Numbuh 5 and Numbuh 2 up here special to talk about these things. Couldn't ya just gotten all this from the records?"

* * *

"What does this have to do with me anyway?" Hoagie finally asked.

Fanny stopped in the middle of a tirade about Celtic culture and matriarchal society. "Oh… that." She seemed to deflate once actually brought down to business. "You were directly involved in the Spinach incident, yes?"

* * *

"You've gotten to know Stickybeard and his crew pretty well, right?" 362 cast a thoughtful eye at Numbuh 5.

* * *

"Oh yeah, I was actually part of the order for a little while." Numbuh 2 rubbed the back of his neck. "Kinda cool, until I found out what they were doing."

* * *

"Numbuh 5 knows him and the boys about as well as anyone." Abby glanced over at Numbuh 362. "Why you asking?"

362 paused a moment, tapping her finger on the console hesitantly. Finally she turned to face the operative.

"I want you and Numbuh 2 to run a spy mission."

* * *

"A spy?!" Numbuh 2 was all excitement. "Like with disguises and top-secret investigations and cloak and dagger stuff? Do I get a cool watch that sets off bombs or tells me…"

"NO!" Numbuh 86 had recovered her ire. "Listen! We need you to go to Spinachia, or wherever their base is, and offer to join their little garden party. We want you to figure out their next move, and if possible, get them to go up against Stickybeard, so the two of them wipe each other out!" She handed him a tiny earpiece. "You'll keep in constant contact with Numbuh 5 so the two of you can coordinate tactics to move them against each other. You will be working together, but _Numbuh 5_ is in charge of this mission." She glared at Hoagie. "Do you think you can remember all that, BOY?"

* * *

"You can do that, right?" 362 studied Numbuh 5

"Yeah, Numbuh 5 knows where they hang out." Abby nodded reluctantly. "And they should let Numbuh 5 onboard. Sticky even offered Numbuh 5 the position of First Mate once. But listen, sister, I don't much like the idea of turnin' them people against each other so they knock each other down." She frowned. "They're enemies and all, but they've saved Numbuh 5 and her friends once or twice."

"I know." 362 sighed. "But we don't have much choice. If they go around for much longer, they'll start working together, and then we'd have a big problem on our hands. Don't forget what happened when he attacked the Moonbase."

"Yeah, yeah, Numbuh 5 remembers." Abby agreed. She remained silent for a while, fingering the lollipop in her hand, then suddenly spoke up. "But if that's all this was, why'd you split us up like this, in secret briefings and all?"

* * *

"Why'd you split up me and Numbuh 5 like this?" Hoagie stared at Fanny. He had started to absentmindedly to munch on the spinach leaf. "If we're supposed to be coordinating our moves, wouldn't it have been easier to just give us the information together?"

* * *

"Well…" Numbuh 362 put a hand to the back of her helmet.

* * *

"Ah-ha." Fanny let out a nervous laugh. "Yes, well…"

* * *

"Numbuh 86 suggested it." 362 studied her boots. "But I do have something to ask you that is best kept from Numbuh 2."

* * *

"Numbuh 362 specifically requested separate briefings." 86 fiddled around with her holster. "But I do have some highly confidential matters to discuss with you."

* * *

"The fact is, " Numbuh 362 drew herself up and tried to look her most commanderly. "I need you to give me a sooper-secret appraisal of a member of your sector, your leader, in fact."

Numbuh 5 eyed the Soopreme Leader skeptically.

"Numbuh 1 is being considered for a... delicate position, and I need your input on his commanding abilities."

* * *

"I was just wonderin'" Fanny rubbed her sleeve with her free hand. "KND leadership thinks it might be good to have a new recommisioning module available for emergencies."

Numbuh 2 gave the Global Tactical Commander a disbelieving stare.

"You know, just in case we had another mistake, like with the whole business with Chad and you guys." Numbuh 86 tried a smile.

* * *

362 walked over to a low bench and sat down, still speaking. "In particular, I need you to list how he handles threats to his teammates, his loyalty to KND administration, attachments outside of the Kids Next Door and how strong they are likely to be…"

Numbuh 5 cut her off. "Girl, stop there a minute."

362 froze, her mouth still open.

Abby looked at Rachel. "You wanna know if Numbuh 1 likes you, don't ya?"

* * *

"As one of the chief experts in 2x4 technology, I have been asked to secretly commission you to rebuild the module using the remnants stored in the KND museum. Once finished, you shall hand it over to Global Command…"

"Wait a minute." Numbuh 2 held up his hand, stopping Fanny. "I offered to do this earlier, right after it broke. You guys told me that the module was too dangerous, because it could be used to reactivate Grandfather."

86 bit her lip. "We did? Well…" She gave out a nervous chuckle. "We changed our minds, haha!"

"86…" Hoagie looked at Fanny. "Global Command didn't ask for this. You did. Why do you want me to rebuild it?"

Fanny stared at him, at a loss for words.

Understanding dawned on Hoagie's face. "Your birthday. You're worried about being decommissioned, aren't you?"

* * *

Rachel stared at her feet, silent. A faint tinge of red could be seen on her cheeks.

* * *

"No, I… Of course not! I just…" Fanny dithered awkwardly.

* * *

"Oh, sister." Numbuh 5 sighed, shaking her head. Rachel's silence was enough answer. "It's cause of what happened during the whole "It" thing, ain't it?"

Rachel nodded slowly. "I'd admired him for a long time, but that was the first time I really got a chance to talk to him one-on-one. Even then I didn't think much of it, but later, when the Global Tactical position came up, he was the first one I thought of and after that…" She sighed and suddenly changed subjects. "I think everyone was impressed after the whole thing with Numbuh Zero. I thought it would wear off, but…" She shook her head.

Numbuh 5 remained silent.

"I just…" 362 tried to find the right words. "He just… He seemed so concerned. Not just from a logistics standpoint, more from the view of an old friend." She looked up at Numbuh 5. "Do you know how long it's been since anyone in the KND talked to me as a friend, and not as a leader?"

Rachel hid her head in her hands. "I guess… it just stuck with me. And then I started to notice all the times he went on missions, all the little things he did, how he always came through…" A shaky half-laugh escaped her hands. "It's silly, isn't it? Me, the Soopreme Leader of the KND, acting like a little girl."

Numbuh 5 came over and sat next to her leader on the bench. "Ya know, you may not believe it, but Numbuh 5 used to feel that way once."

Rachel's head came up from her hands. "You did?"

"Sure." Abby nodded. "Back in basic training, Numbuh 5 fell for Numbuh 1 like nothin' else. Course, back then, I was fallin' for nearly every boy in the camp, but I _really_ fell for Numbuh 1."

"But…" A grin was starting on Rachel's face. "You're… you… never…"

"Yeah, Numbuh 5 knows." Abby laughed. "Numbuh 5's supposed to be the big tough girl. But Numbuh 5 wasn't like that back in trainin'. Numbuh 5 still played with her sis and had a good time once in a while. And Numbuh 5 _liked_ Numbuh 1. You know the Kids Next Door entrance exam?" She glanced at Rachel. "Numbuh 1 never passed it. Numbuh 5 hacked into the KND computermabob and changed his grades."

"You did?" Disbelief was all over Rachel's face.

"Sure did." Abby smiled. "Numbuh 5 was crazy back then."

"So… why did you…?" Rachel let the question fall

"Well, Numbuh 5 changed some after her big sister left." Abby's face grew sadder at the thought. "But there was something else." She remained silent for a moment in memory.

"Numbuh 5 should say something first." Abby paused to explain. "As a leader, she still likes Numbuh 1. Even after Cree left, Numbuh 5 still kinda liked him. He's a good man and all, and he knows how to lead a team, that's for sure. As far as operatives go, you don't get much better than Numbuh 1"

Rachel nodded. "But?"

Abby sighed. "Ya don't always wannna hang out with someone who's so… _serious_ all the time, ya know? I mean, Numbuh 1 is all business. He never does anything for fun, he practically _lives _for the KND." Numbuh 5 shook her head. "That's great and all, but Numbuh 5 got enough business in her already. Sometimes she wants to kick back for some rest and re-laxation."

Abby bent over, her eyes hidden by her hat. "An' sometimes, what Numbuh 5 really needs is just someone to help her laugh."

She picked up the end of her long ponytail and began to play with it. "Numbuh 5's got enough things to be serious about. Sometimes, all she wants to do is forget them and find some fun in life."

There was a moment of silence. "I'm sorry." Rachel said, finally.

* * *

Hoagie shook his head. "Look, I feel bad for you and all, 86, but you gotta follow the rules! You should know that as much as anyone. Every Kids Next Door operative, once they turn thirteen…"

"I know!" Fanny snapped suddenly. "I know all about that, you stupid boy! I know all the rules and regulations, the protocols and the established order. I know all about that!" She screamed. "I know everything about the decommissioning procedures, I've had to live through them for ten years. _Ten Years_, d'you hear me!?"

Fanny's voice grew a little shaky. "For ten years I've been the watchdog of the KND. Ten years a' chasin' down teenagers. Ten years a' turning against me own operatives. Ten years of wipin' the memories of anyone who could ever try to be my friend! Ten years!" Fanny's voice choked. "An' I loved every minute of it."

Hoagie stared at her. His jaw hung open and his arms hung useless at his side.

"I was the best…" Fanny leaned against the console for support. "The best. I was the elite, the top girl, the hardcore soldier at the front of the action. I led the toughest, the meanest sector in all of the KND, and I was the one who took them down when they were done. I even took down Numbuh 274 when he turned rouge."

Hoagie, confused, raised a finger. "Now hang on, Numbuh 1…"

"I was the best." Fanny didn't even seem to hear him. "And now I'm just another operative, just another number in the computer. Just another…" She hid her head in her hands. "just another teenager waiting for my time."

There was a short period of silence. Hoagie started to say something, then stopped, then started again, then hesitated, and finally just walked over to Fanny and sat on the control panel. He looked at his feet for a moment.

Finally he spoke. "You know, I wonder why they choose the best to a-r**rest** people."

Fanny glared at him.

"Okay, okay." He winced. "Geez. Just trying to help." He looked down and twiddled his thumbs. "You know, it isn't really all that fun trying to be the best all the time. You have to always be serious, and have to keep worrying about what you what might do wrong."

Fanny sniffed. "And what would you know about that, BOY? The only thing you're good at is that stoopid 2x4 technology we always have you working on."

"Hey!" Hoagie turned to face her. "That technology is vital for the KND operatives. Besides," he huffed. "I've been trying to be the funniest guy in the KND for years. I know what it's like to try to be the best."

"THAT?" Fanny started, incredulous. "You have the worst jokes I've ever heard."

"They're not so bad!" Hoagie protested. "And I'm always thinking of new ones. I just got this really funny one about a priest, an elephant, and a jar of strawberry jelly. See, the priest walks into a mushroom patch…"

Fanny glared at him.

"Right." Hoagie sighed and gave up. "But don't you see, that's what we've been talking about! I try to be the funniest guy, and it's the part that doesn't work out for some reason. All the other stuff, I know I'm no good at, so I don't even try, and it ends up being lots more fun. I can't fight, so I let Numbuh 4 handle that. I don't know how to lead, so I just do whatever Numbuh 1 tells me too. And I'm the second most clumsy guy on our team, so I let Numbuh 5 handle stealth. I've never been number one at anything, I've always been second best. And it's fun."

Fanny sat silently, mulling over his words. Hoagie studied her, worried. Finally she looked up.

"You're the best technician, though." There was a hint of amused scorn in her voice. "Doesn't that ever bug you?"

* * *

Abby shook her hair back and straightened up. "Aw, don' worry about it, sister." She answered in her old tone. "Numbuh 5 found another man to make her happy. 'Sides, things wouldn't 'a worked out anyway. Numbuh 1 don't know how to have fun. He's a great leader, but he's way too focused."

362 gave a little chuckle. "Focus. That's him alright."

"Among other things." Abby nodded. "He's real devoted. He lives for the KND, it's like its his life or somethin'. Even when he don't have to do anything, Numbuh 1 is always looking for new problems and hopin' to fight adults. Numbuh 5 used to think that the reason he was always talkin' to Numbuh 5 was cause he liked her." Numbuh 5 smiled. "Now I just think he was making sure the team was doin' okay."

* * *

"Are you kidding?" Hoagie looked at her. "The reason I play around with that stuff isn't because I want to be the best. The reason I play with it is because it's fun!" He stared. "If I didn't like it, I'd stop doing it."

Numbuh 86 snorted. "Don't tell me that. You work too hard at it for it to always be fun."

"I do not!" Hoagie huffed.

Fanny glared at him.

"Well…." Hoagie sighed. "Okay. It's not as much fun as it used to be. But it's a different kind of fun. It's harder, more obscure kind of fun, but it's deeper too, a… a… I don't know! It's still fun! Just… not the same kind of fun."

Fanny raised an eyebrow skeptically. "And this is why you keep working on those stupid contraptions?"

"There are other rewards." Hoagie grinned. "Did I ever tell you about that one hamster project I was working on the time we caught Cree?"

"Yes." Fanny glared at him.

"Oh, yeah." Hoagie chuckled nervously. "Well, anyway, the point is, girls are attracted to intelligent, refined men like myself."

"Not any girls I know." Fanny scowled.

Hoagie smiled. "I can think of one."

* * *

"Number 5 ain't into that dark and mysterious type so much anymore anyways." Abby set her hat at a jaunty angle. "There's too many of 'em."

"Hmmm." Rachel studied the ground. Finally she spoke. "So… you think… maybe he was just concerned for the Kids Next Door? That's why he helped out?"

* * *

"Whatever." Fanny snarled. "But you still haven't answered my question yet." She set her feet apart. "Can you rebuild the recommisionin' module? Global Command orders you too, even if the Soopreme Leader doesn't." Her eyes burned into him. "What do you say, BOY?"

* * *

Abby shrugged. "Girl, you know better than Numbuh 5 what happened there. From the sounds of things it was pretty hairy, but Numbuh 1 lives for that kinda stuff. As for the talkin' to ya bit…" Abby smiled a little. " I never known Numbuh 1 to talk to anyone about anything except missions."

Rachel looked up.

"But then," Abby shrugged again. "who can understand what Numbuh 1 does any of the time? He's crazy!"

* * *

"You should know better than that!" Numbuh 2 whined. "The materials are being kept under close guard at the KND museum. Only 362 has access to them now! Besides, even if I could get at them, I have no idea how those things work! You and Numbuh 1 are the only ones who have operated it, and no one took a good look to see how it worked before it broke." He collapsed in an indignant huff. "And anyway, we don't have Numbuh Zero's genetic material anymore."

All the air seemed to go out of Fanny. She bowed her head in silence.

"Of course." Numbuh 2 continued. "That doesn't mean I wouldn't want to try."

* * *

Rachel remained silent a long time. Abby stood there, calmly studying her, waiting for the leader to speak. She came to attention as Rachel finally gave a sigh.

"Dismissed." Said Numbuh 362. "I'll send your mission specs down by teletran."

Numbuh 5 nodded. "Gotcha." She moved to the door and left.

* * *

Fanny didn't respond. Hoagie stood there, awkwardly at attention, shifting weight from one to another, waiting for an answer. He coughed once, twice, three times. No response.

"So, is that all you wanted?" He tried.

He waited. No answer.

"Okay." A pause. "I… I guess I'm dismissed then, right?"

"Yes." Numbuh 86 finally answered. "You're dismissed."

"Okay!" Numbuh 2 moved toward the exit, glad of an excuse to leave.

"Numbuh 2!" Fanny's head was to the floor, but her voice still stopped him.

"You… you might have a point there. Mebbe I should retire."

"Glad to hear it!" Hoagie squeaked, before turning and running down the hallway.

* * *

Numbuhs 2 and 5 met in the hanger bay next to their SCAMPER. "All set, Numbuh 5?" Hoagie asked, a little too quickly.

"Yeah, Numbuh 5's all set." Abby looked him over. "What's the matter wid you, Numbuh 2? You're as jumpy as a rabbit."

"Oh nothing." Hoagie opened the door and just climbed inside. "I'll drive, okay?"

"Brother, you always drive." Abby glared at him. "Numbuh 5 thinks it's her turn to drive."

"But I'm the official pilot!" Hoagie whined. "And you're not cleared for this kind of aircraft!"

Abby just stood in the doorway and looked at him.

Hoagie dropped his arms, defeated. "Fine, you can drive, Numbuh 5." He grumbled, starting to climb out of the seat.

"Ha!" Abby jumped into the passenger seat before Hoagie could climb out of the driver's. "Numbuh 5 was just kidding. She don't want to drive, she wants to relaaax." She leaned back into the seat's cushion.

Hoagie stared at her. "Okaaaaaay." He straightened in his seat and engaged the engines. The SCAMPER floated out of the hanger bay and began its descent to earth. Hoagie glanced over at the seemingly comatose girl in the seat across from him several times before finally shrugging it off to concentrate at the flight plan.

"Why are you so nervous, anyway?" Abby's voice broke in on his thoughts.

So she wasn't asleep. Hoagie turned to face her. "Oh, nothing much." He tried a laugh. "Just this mission they gave us, I guess. What'd you talk about with 362 for so long?"

Abby shrugged. "Girl stuff, Numbuh 2. Nothin' you'd be interested in. What you'd talk about with Numbuh 86?"

"Guy stuff." Hoagie completely missed the strange look Abby gave him. "Nothing too interesting, Numbuh 5. Pretty boring really."

A giggle interrupted him. He turned in astonishment. "Numbuh 5? You okay?"

"I'm fine." She chuckled. "Numbuh 5's just fine. It just…" She shook her head and exploded into a new set of giggles. Hoagie looked at her, absolutely bewildered.

"Ya know, Hoagie," Abby finally gasped out. "you are so funny sometimes!"

Hoagie could do no more than stare at the giggling girl as the ship made it's way toward the brightening earth.

* * *

Please Review. It helps me out a lot with stories, and it really motivates me to write more. I'd like some measure of how you guys like this and what you'd like me to do. Thanks to MusicGirl101 for her constant reviews so far.

Ironically enough, I was in two minds about this, and still am. The narrative structure is somewhat taken from Brave New World, where several dialogues are layered on top of each other. I was thinking to split it into two chapters just since it's so stinking long, but I finally just decided to submit it since I like the unity(ha ha) of it like this.

Now I'm wondering whether I should just let this stand by itself and continue on these one-story studies, but I don't think so. I think I'll add more chapters.

By the way, the whole SEPARATION angle is here, but it will continue in the later chapters. Abby and Hoagie are going to be rather severely… tested in this spy mission.

Oh, and hey, I did a picture based on Numbuh 5 talking to 362. Check it here: .com/art/Separation-5-and-362-59814356


	2. Break time

"Don't worry about it, Numbuh 3." Abby shoved some things into her pack. "Numbuh 5 just needs some time off, that's all."

"But you won't be here for the Rainbow Monkey Love-a-thon!" The long-haired Japanese girl gazed at her with big, mournful eyes. "Who am I going to have for my special friend?"

"Aw girl, you know Numbuh 5 hates that show anyway." Abby rolled her eyes. A sly grin spread on her face. "Why don't ya ask Numbuh 4? Maybe he'll help you out with that."

"Oh, silly!" Kuki patted Abby's red cap. "Numbuh 4 never watches Rainbow Monkey shows! Anyway, the Rainbow Monkey Love-a-thon requires that you and your special friend give great loveable Rainbow Monkey hugs every twenty minutes."

"Just ask him." Abby turned back to her packing, still grinning.

"Where are you going, anyway?" Kuki bounced after her friend.

* * *

"I told you already, I can't really tell you where I'm going." Numbuh 2 glanced anxiously at the things in his hands. "Hey, Numbuh 4, do you think I should bring the zytho-plastin-frequency-modulator, or just take the brick?"

"Well, why can't you tell me?" Wally set down the huge suitcase he was carrying. "Do you trust me or what?" He took a quick look. "Take the brick. There's not much room."

"I… well… Of course I trust you, Numbuh 4." Hoagie dropped in the brick. "But, it's just that… well… I mean… this trip is kinda supposed to be secret."

"You're taking a vacation and it's supposed to be secret?" Numbuh 4 tried to tug the case shut, but failed miserably. "Whose cruddy idea was that?!"

"Um…" Hoagie jumped onto the suitcase lid and sat there as Wally zipped it shut. "Well, see, Numbuh 362 said that enemies, like Cree or Father, might try to attack us if they knew where we were. So she said we should keep it secret!"

"But I wouldn't tell those guys!" Numbuh 4 spread out his arms defensively. "I'd punch their lights out if any of 'em came sniffing around here!"

Numbuh 2 didn't answer. Wally watched him hoist up the heavy suitcase and stagger a few steps forward.

"Why'd 362 suggest a vacation in the first place?" He asked.

* * *

"I think I am entitled to know why two members of my sector have suddenly been granted a leave of absence." Nigel's bald head gleamed blue in the glare of the teletran message system, and the blonde head of 362 reflected in his sunglasses.

"You're not really cleared for that information, but you'll find out soon enough, so I might as well tell you." The Supreme leader glared back at him with a stony gaze equal to his own. "Kids Next Door tactical command is preparing a major offensive against the teenagers. We think it better if Numbuh 5 is not involved, given her connection to the ninjas."

"Numbuh 5 has shown the greatest devotion and commitment in opposing her sister." Numbuh 1 shot back. "Moreover, she is the only member of my sector who stands a chance against Cree!"

"She has also foiled at least one of our attack plans against the teenagers." 362 raised an eyebrow. "Do you recall her behavior with the unpoppable zit?"

"Well, yes, but…"

"Also." 362 continued, without waiting for 1's answer. "I have received a report that Numbuh 5 may have come very close to actually joining the Teen Ninjas."

"What!" Numbuh 1's glasses slipped. "Who sent in that report? None of our sources here at the treehouse have any record of such behavior…'

"The source of the report is classified." 362 tucked a stray piece of hair into her helmet. "To be honest, I'm not even sure where it came from. But the evidence is solid. Remember the time when Numbuh 5 left your sector for a prolonged period of time, only to be picked up from a suspected teen installation, with a chronic case of chicken pox and no further explanation of what she had been doing?"

Numbuh 1 shifted his feet uneasily. "Many of the facts regarding that case are uncertain, numbuh 362; and Numbuh 5's devotion to the KND…"

"Has been called into question." 362 glared at him. "And until it has been resolved, I'm putting her on temporary leave."

"And Numbuh 2? You can't be serious!" Numbuh 1 pleaded with the screen. "You're ridding me of half my team! And why does he need a vacation?"

"Oh, that's easy to explain." Numbuh 362 picked up a paper. "His relation to the enemy is well-documented."

* * *

"But Numbuh 5!" Kuki wailed. "If you don't wear my Rainbow Monkey's Best Friends necklace, then you won't have anything to remember me by!"

Abby rolled her eyes. "All right, all right. Numbuh 5'll wear the stupid thing. Just stop your cryin' about it already."

"Yay!" Kuki skipped over to Abby and drew the necklace over her head, fastening the clasp. "There you go!" She grabbed hold of Abby's shoulders and twirled her around. "Now lemme see!"

Abby shook her head wearily and looked down at the chincey trinket. It was essentially a rainbow monkey, in plastic glitter on a plastic chain. Its arms were spread wide in what was evidently meant to be an embrace.

"There! Now you look all pretty!" Kuki picked out another similar one and clicked it into the other's arms. "And I have one too! Now, whenever we look at them, we can remember each other! Won't that be fun?"

"Yeah, whatever, sister." Abby touched the pendant with a small smile. "At least it'll give Numbuh 5 something to show the folks at the resort." She broke the two apart. "Thanks anyway."

"You're welcome!" Kuki glanced around brightly. "Want me to help with your pack?"

"Thanks, Numbuh 5's got it." Abby shouldered her knapsack. "Guess I better get moving."

* * *

"I think that's the last of it." Hoagie gazed about the room in satisfaction.

"Finally!" Wally collapsed onto the bed, shaped, strangely enough, like an airplane cockpit. "Why do you have so much cuddy junk anyway?"

"Hey!" Hoagie glared at him. "I just wanna make sure I have everything I need, that's all. A seasoned adventurer knows to be prepared for every possible eventuality."

Wally snorted. "Right. You should have enough in there to handle a flock of carnivorous wombats."

Hoagie gave him a strange look.

"What?" Wally asked.

"Uh, nothing, Numbuh 4." Hoagie turned to his suitcases and picked up two of them. "Anyway, I'm definitely gonna have enough stuff to keep me at the top of my game on this mis—on this vacation."

"You're not really goin' are ya?" Wally began to look a little distressed. "I mean, ya ain't gonna be gone long, right?"

"Oh, no, not long at all… Well, actually, probably pretty long… No, on second thought, it shouldn't…" Hoagie stopped. "Um, to be honest, I don't know."

"Aaaaw man!" Wally punched the bed. "You realize, don't ya, that while you're gone, I'm gonna be stuck here with that cruddy girl?"

"For Pete's sake, Numbuh 4," Hoagie rolled his eyes. "It's not prison or anything. Try and get her to play some video games. Anyway, Numbuh 1'll be here."

"Huh!" Wally sat up and folded his arms. "Numbuh 1 hardly does anything outside of the mission room. It's gonna be booooring with just him and Numbuh 3 here."

"I'm sorry, Numbuh 4." Hoagie shrugged helplessly. "I need to take this vacation. It's important, the future of Kids Next Door may depend on it!"

"Huh?" Wally looked at his friend, confused.

"Uh, I mean…" Hoagie panicked slightly. "Hey, Numbuh 4! Could you help me with these suitcases?"

"Oh, sure thing Numbuh 2!" Wally hopped off the bed, the incident forgotten.

* * *

Numbuh 1 stepped out of the briefing room, rubbing his chin. A noise made him look up.

Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 4 came out of one door. Each of them carried several large and bulky suitcases. Out of the other came Numbuh 5, wearing a light knapsack, closely trailed by Numbuh 3.

"Make sure you send me lotsa postcards, and letters, and packages, and ooh! Numbuh 5! See if you can get some of those nifty flattened coins they make at visitor centers!"

"Right, Numbuh 3. Numbuh 5'll be sure to do that." Abby didn't even turn around. "Hey, Numbuh 2! Looks like you got a lotta luggage there, brother! How you gonna carry it all?"

"Oh yeah." Hoagie let the suitcases fall to the floor and grabbed one of Wally's. He reached under the handle and pressed a button. Four arms unfolded from the bundle and grabbed the other parcels, and some wheels popped out of the bottom.

"That should carry me to the bus stop." Hoagie looked at his invention with pride.

"An' why couldn't we use that earlier?" Wally rubbed his sore back.

"It wouldn't have the same dramatic effect." Hoagie replied, nose in the air. He glanced at Abby. "I've got another one, if you want to use it, Numbuh 5."

"Uh, thanks, Numbuh 2." Abby looked the machine skeptically. "But Numbuh 5 thinks she'll just carry her own stuff. It ain't that far to the bus stop."

Hoagie shrugged. "Works for me."

"Have a good **vacation**, both of you." Nigel walked down the steps to join them. "Believe me, you've deserved it after all you've done for the KND."

"Glad to hear it." Abby hoisted up her pack higher. "Cause Numbuh 5 ain't comin' back for nuthin! She's headed for some relaxation!"

"Uh, yeah, relaxation." Hoagie seemed a little less enthusiastic. "Say, Numbuh 1, are you sure you don't need us for anything? I mean, you know how to operate the base security and all the flyers while I'm gone?"

Nigel waved dismissively. "Now, don't worry, Numbuh 2, Numbuhs 3 and 4 and I will take care of everything while you're gone. You both just make sure you enjoy a good time off."

"Right." Hoagie rubbed the back of his neck. "Time off. That's what we're doing. Heh. Ow!"

Abby had smacked him with her hat. "Will you quit gabbin, fool? You and me gotta catch the 7:30 bus if we wanna get to the train on time, and Numbuh 5 ain't planning to delay things any more than they is already."

"Yes." Numbuh 1 nodded. "It's high time the both of you were on your way."

"Ohhhhhhhh!" Numbuh 3 wrapped Abby in an enormous hug. "Hurry back, Numbuh 5! And make sure to look at your Rainbow monkey necklace every day, so we can remember each other!"

Number 5 patted the girl on the head. "Numbuh 5'll remember, Numbuh 3. Now, could you get offa Numbuh 5? This is kinda embarressin'"

Wally snorted. "Girls. Always gotta be so sentimental about leavin'. Not us boys. We're better about these things, right, Numbuh 2?"

"Sure, Numbuh 4." Hoagie nodded, sniffing a little. "We hate all these long goodbyes."

"It's time for the both of you to go." Numbuh 1 waited for Abby to get out of Kuki's grip, then led them to the door. "Hope the resort is lots of fun." He shook Abby's hand. "Have a good time, Numbuh 5."

Abby nodded, her eyes veiled. "I sure will, Numbuh 1. You have a good time, too, and don't worry about us none." She paused as Hoagie came up.

Nigel shook Hoagie's hand. "Have a good time at flight camp, Hoagie." He locked eyes with his old friend. "**Whatever** you do there."

Hoagie gulped anxiously and looked at Abby. She made no sign.

"Remember." Nigel continued. "If you need anything, anything at all, let me know."

"R…r…right Numbuh 1." Hoagie nodded. "Sure thing." He stammered a little. "Um… actually, Numbuh 1, I was thinking…"

"C'mon, fool, we gonna be late for the bus!" Abby grabbed Hoagie's arm and pulled him out the door.

The three remaining operatives stood at the door, watching Numbuh 5 drag Numbuh 2 down the street.

Kuki spoke first. "That was really weird." She said.

* * *

"No, that was stupid." Abby berated Hoagie as they went down the sidewalk. "Another two seconds and you woulda totally blown the whole thing. Numbuh 5 had to get you outta there before you lost it."

"But Numbuh 5!" Hoagie pleaded with her. "Why can't we tell Numbuh 1? He's our leader, after all! He has a right to know these things!"

"Numbuh 1 is an operative of KND, an' he would do the same thing in our position." Abby reminded "Remember the time we was all pretendin' to like that Delightful who was here, and we had to keep Numbuh 4 out of it, because he would never would be able to pretend liking him?"

"Yeah." Numbuh 2 admitted. "I remember."

"Well this is about the same thing." Numbuh 5 stopped and turned to face him. "If Numbuh 1 knew what we was doin', he might be happier about it, but he also wouldn't be able to keep up as good a story that we was gone on vacation, and Numbuh 3 and 4 really wouldn't be able to."

"I guess." Hoagie grumbled. "But I still say its different. Last time we were trying to trick enemies, this time we're tricking friends."

"It ain't tricking." Numbuh 5 raised an eyebrow. "It's called spying."

"I don't see how that's different." Numbuh 2 huffed. "How come you're so good at this, anyway?"

"Cause Numbuh 5 does this all the time at home." Abby turned to the road. "C'mon, our bus's here."

There was a blast of hot air, a roar of jets, and a flash of yellow as the KND transport COOLBUS skidded to a landing. The doors slid open with a little ding, revealing Numbuh 86.

"Everything in order, Numbuh 5?" The global tactical officer gave them a hard look.

"Perfectly in order, Numbuh 86." Abby climbed on board, followed closely by Hoagie. "The rest'a the sector thinks Numbuh 5 and Numbuh 2 have left on vacation."

"Very good." 86 nodded.

"Still don't see why we couldn't tell them about it." Hoagie grumbled, taking a seat.

"For the last time, Numbuh 2." Abby threw an exasperated glance at him. "It's safer this way. What Numbuh 1 don't know won't hurt him."

* * *

Numbuh Three burst into the control room. "Hi, Numbuh 1!" She bounced up to the silent leader. "What you doing here in the control room? I thought there weren't any more missions today!"

"You never know what might turn up, Numbuh 3." Nigel turned from the radar panel. "What are you doing here?"

Kuki shrugged. "After Numbuh 2 left, Numbuh 4 went in his room and he won't come out, not even for a Snuggly-wuffy-Rainbow Monkey! I tried to talk to him, but Numbuh 4 was all like: 'bah, go away, cruddy girl.' So I came to see what you were doing." She smiled brightly. "Hey!" She picked up a sticky sucker from the desk. "I thought you liked Cherry, Numbuh 1. Why do you have this Burpleberry one?" She poked at it. "Ewwwww! It's all covered with hairy stuff? What's it doing here?"

"A good question, Numbuh Three." Numbuh One nodded. "A good question."

* * *

Keep up with the reviews! They are they lifeblood of my writing! Thank you to everyone who has so far!

I will try to update this on a weekly basis, but I'm not promising anything. There are a number of ways I want to go with this, and I hope to have a lot of characters involved by the end.


	3. Breaking in with the Buccaneers

"You got a lotta nerve comin' back here to the Candy Bar, lassy." The captain growled at her from behind his huge red beard. "Even if you did help us save me ol' cabin boy the last time we meet, you and I is still sworn enemies!

Abby rolled her eyes. "Stuff it, Sticky. Abby didn't come here for none of that this time." She looked up at the hedge of swords, wielded by the pirates surrounding her. "Say, Cap, how's about you tellin' your boys to sit down and take it easy?"

"I'll do nothing of the kind!" Stickybeard glowered, sucking on a lollipop disconsolately. "After how you tricked me and me cabin boy like that, you got no welcome comin' here! Unless, that is," He suddenly leaned far over the table, a smile on his lips. "ye be looking for a rematch with ol' Stickybeard. We never did do our two out of three."

"Abby beat you fair and square." Numbuh 5 waved derisively. "She didn't come here for no rematch. Abby's lookin' for a new job."

Stickybeard raised an eyebrow. "An' what kind of job would you be lookin' for, me hearty?"

Numbuh 5 skimmed the sugar off the top of Stickybeard's mug before answering. "Abby was thinking to take you up on that candy you was offerin' her that one time."

Growls broke loose from the crew.

Stickybeard pounded the table. "Ye rejected that offer a long time ago, lass! Tis' too late now to try to take it up! I'll hear of no such bargaining!"

"What'sa matter, Sticky?" Numbuh 5 grinned across the table. "Don't got the candy you used'ta? Or are ya just more stingy now?"

The crew nodded, grumbling. Stickybeard looked distinctly uncomfortable. "Now, look here lads, I've always been generous with ye, haven't I? You know yourself, we ain't had a good spot of piratin' since last Easter!" He turned savagely on Numbuh 5. "This here last and her blasted Kids Next Door keep on a-gettin' in the way!"

"Aw, Abby knows all about that." Numbuh 5 licked the sugar from her fingers, ignoring the growing rumbles of anger. "But she ain't in the Kids Next Door no more."

"Ain't ye now?" Stickybeard raised a bushy disbelieving eyebrow.

"Nah." Abby leaned back in her chair. "She couldn't take it no more. They ain't got no time in the KND for the sweetness of life, ya know? So she packed up and left. Numbuh 1 and the others back at the treehouse think she's on vacation right now, but Abby ain't goin' back for nothing!"

"Is that so?" The captain thoughtfully tugged on a blueberry sucker. "Then I suppose yer wouldn't mind givin ol' Stickybeard the access codes to yer blasted KND artic prison, now wouldn't ye?"

Abby snorted. "No. But what would you want those for, Sticky? Heinie isn't there anymore."

Stickybeard stopped and stared. The pirates started back and looked at each other significantly.

Abby seemed not to notice. "You're tryin' to get Heinie loose, aint'cha? Abby knew as soon as she heard about you boys attackin' the artic base." She paused and glanced at Sticky. "Why you so concerned about that, anyway? You never bothered about him before."

The pirates fell silent. Stickybeard seemed a trifle unsettled by the question. "He's my cabin boy, ain't he? Can't a captain try to get his ol' cabin boy back without everyone asking questions?" He glared at Abby. "It be inhuman to keep any being locked up for that long. Ya got no right to treat him that way, and ol' Stickybeard'll see to it that ye don't!"

"Uh-huh." Abby's eyes narrowed. "Anyway, Kids Next Door is awful upset 'bout that whole attacking thing. If they knew where this place was, they'd bomb it off the map as soon as look at it."

"Arr, let them try!" Stickybeard slashed the air savagely. "I've got meself a slew of new hands, and enough fancy gadgets from that Father scallywag to pound half of your blasted KND to oblivion."

Abby raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Than why didn'tcha take down the prison?"

There was a bit of hesitation at this. Some of the pirates mumbled scattered excuses, others simply looked down at the floor. A number looked hopefully at Stickybeard, who appeared greatly embarrassed. He scratched his beard distractedly. "Well… how was we supposed to know that you confounded kids would have a blasted navy, anyway? Yer all came out of the fog and attacked us from behind." He made a snatch at dignity. "It be a cowardly maneuver, and such as no able seaman would have done!"

"Ye cursed dogs fired brussel sprouts at us!" Came a hoarse shout. "Such things would've made the bravest pirate turn tail!"

"Aye!" cried the crew in unision.

"Huh." Abby looked at the pirates skeptically. "Abby thinks maybe you all ain't as strong as what you think you is. Abby says, you need more hands. And Abby says that you need her."

"And why, in the name of plunder, do I need you?" Stickybeard growled. "Ye may say me cabin boy ain't in that prison of yours, but I got no way of knowin' if ye be fibbin' or not. As for that confounded navy of yours, ye may have taken us by surprise the first time, but we'll be ready for ya the next time."

"Sure ya will." Abby nodded. "And mebbe, after you defeat our great an' mighty navy, and blast your way through all the ice and the operatives and the defenses, and finally find out Heinie isn't there; you'll just waltz on back to your Candy Bar an' start looking all over again."

There were some mutters from the crew. Even Stickybeard looked a trifle nonplussed.

"Now listen here." Abby leaned over the table and looked Stickybeard directly in the eye. "Abby can tell you where Heinie is, how to get to him, where the Kids Next Door navy is hidin' out, and exactly how to take them down; an' all you has to do in return is give her a place to hide out from the Kids Next Door."

The two rivals studied each other, Abby's steady gaze locked on Stickybeard's calculating eyes.

"I did always admire your spirit, lassie." Stickybeard's arm reached beneath the table and brought out long, wicked, peppermint cutlass. "But ol' Stickybeard has a better idea. Why don't you just tell me the lot now, and I let ye out of here with yer life."

Abby ignored the sharp blade edging toward her. "Abby tells you that and goes back to the KND, she might just as well be dead. They'll lock her up until the prison melts on top of her." Her own hand came out from under the table, a small spearmint dagger in its grip. It parried the cutlass and trapped it to the table. "No. Abby told you the deal. If you don't like it, don't take it, but don't try to change it any." She grinned. "I'll tell you what. You just make me one of the boys, forget about the whole first mate thang, and I'll throw in a little something."

Her other hand came out from under the table, bearing a strange packet. "Abby was savin' this for a special occasion, but she guesses this's special as anything." She gave the parcel a light toss across the table, letting it roll to a halt just in front of Stickybeard.

The pirate captain studied it for a moment, glancing up periodically at Abby. The pirates shifted about, anxious with curiosity and suspense.

Abby licked her lips a moment.

Finally, Stickybeard's gloved hand lifted from the table and unfastened the strings. The cloth fell away from the present, and a light glow filled the room.

The pirates gave a gasp. "By the seven Starfruits of the Sargasso!" Stickybeard picked up the glowing gem. "Tis the Blurpleberry Supreme!"

"From nothin' less than King Two-Tons-of-Candy's Tomb." Abby nodded. "Take a good look at it, Sticky. Abby went through a lotta trouble for that pretty trinket."

Stickybeard looked up at her. "Ye… ye be givin' this to me and the lads?"

Abby nodded. "Let's call it a gesture of good faith, Sticky. I tried to give it to Numbuh 1 once, but he didn't want it." She gestured. "So now Abby figured she'd try and see how you feel."

Stickybeard looked at her, then at the gem, then at his crewmates. Finally he seemed to come to a decision. "Ye may try out for the position of crew member." He nodded. "But first, me hearty, ye'll have to pass the test we gives all our new hands! Long John Stupid!" He cried. A large, dull-looking pirate in a rather outlandish outfit appeared at his elbow. "Go make yerself useful an' fetch the Rock!"

"In here, Cap'n?" John thumbed his big nose, looked stupendously confused. Abby suppressed a grin. For some reason, she was reminded of Numbuh 2.

"Yes, in here, you salty sea-brained son of a scallion!" Stickybeard roared. John flinched at the words. "Bring it in here where we all can watch her do it!"

John's lower lip quivered. "Aw, Cap'n, that's a mean thing for you to…"

Stickybeard rolled his eyes and sighed. "Just do it, will ye John?"

John nodded dumbly and ducked out the door, muttering something about hurt feelings. Stickybeard jumped up from the table and began to shout orders. "All right lads, lets get a space cleared here! Nouh! Latier! Move those tables! Bubblelosa! Pick up these chairs and get them out! Butterbar, don't worry, ye'll not suffer any loss. Come on lads!"

The fracas was interrupted by John, who came staggering in under a huge load of…

"Rock candy?" Abby glanced disbelievingly at the captain. "Whaddaya gonna do with a big hunk of rock candy?"

"I'm not going to do anything, lassie." Stickybeard grinned at her. "It's what ye be willin' to do that's the question."

Abby arched an eyebrow. "Sticky, what you tryin' to say here?"

Stickybeard pointed his peppermint hook at the crispy chunk of sugar. "No man—or woman, fer that matter—ever joined ol' Stickybeard's crew without first lifting the Rock off the ground, and ye be no different. Lift the rock, and ye got yourself a new job."

The pirates laughed in enjoyment as Abby stared at the ponderous hunk of candy. "Who you tryin' to fool? You know Abby can't lift that thing!"

"Oh, I think ya can, lassie, if ye only think about it." Stickybeard chuckled, a gleam in his eye. "An' remember that this here gift—" he waved the Blurpleberry Supreme, "—be a gift, and ye can't take it back now. Now, don't look so glum. It's only as heavy as it is big."

Abby glared at him, then at the monstrous boulder. "Oh, thanks."

Stickybeard simply smiled and stood back. "Get a move on with it, lassie! We be all waitin' for ye!"

There was nothing for it. Abby walked up to the stone, and bent over it to get a good grip. "Think fast, Numbuh 5, think fast." She muttered. "Numbuh 5 has got to lift this here stone." She made sure she had a good hold on the stone, braced her knees, and then pulled with all her might.

Nothing happened. A snicker or two could be heard in the crowd.

Abby glared at the crowd, then bent again. This time, she gripped the opposite side and then rocked back and forth on her feet a little before throwing all her weight backwards.

Again, nothing. Several more snickers.

Abby bent low and paused to take a breath. "How is Numbuh 5 gonna do this?" She muttered. "This candy is just too big! Numbuh 5 can't lift any hunk of candy this size…"

Suddenly her eyes went wide. She realized exactly what to do.

Her hands gripped the side, and her arms pulled. A small piece of rock candy broke off in her hand.

Abby grinned and popped it in her mouth.

Amid shouts of "No!" and "She can't do that!", Abby bent again, breaking off the flaking crystals with her hands and stuffing them in her mouth at an incredible rate. Stickybeard roared with laughter, deaf to the protests of his crewmates, as the huge boulder disappeared, piece by piece.

Finally, there was nothing left of the boulder except a small fragment barely the size of a football. Abby grabbed it and triumphantly hoisted it above her head, amid shouts and cheers. "There ya go, Sticky, the Rock is off the ground now."

"Lassie, it took us half a year to find a piece of rock candy that size." Stickybeard chuckled, wiping his eyes. "But I'd go lookin' for a hundred more for a show like that." He laughed heartily. "Welcome to the crew, matey!"

The bar erupted in shouts of jubilation. "Butterbar!" Stickybeard gave a shout. "Bring out a fresh round to all hands! We've got a new man aboard!"

Cheers resounded from the crew. An elderly, bespectacled man with graying hair hurried over and set mugs around the table.

"Take yer first drink as a pirate, me hearty!" Stickybeard shoved one across the table toward her. "Tis your friends and shipmates we shall be for here and for forever! We'll stand by ye shoulder to shoulder and fight alongside ye, man to… Er…." Sticky paused at Abby's glare. "Er… arr…. well, whatever happens, we'll never betray ye, and we'll always welcome ye as a sister!"

Abby leaned over her drink, eyes hidden by her hat. "Thanks, Sticky. Tis' great to be a pirate."

* * *

Thanks again for the reviews. They really help a lot, indeed, they're half the reason I keep up this crazy thing, so if you like the story and want to find out how it ends, keep reviewing. 

Sorry this took so long. Something weird was going on with the document loader on my computer. I'll try to submit something each Wednesday, if I can.


	4. Disturbed Devotions

The page anxiously consulted his scroll. There had been no mention of the visitors at the door, but that was not unusual for them. Anyway, the king was seeing no one important at the moment, and he could not afford to anger the visitors.

He nodded and opened the door."Enter the mighty presence of Phillip the Second and Two-Fourths, lord and ruler of the thrice-blessed land of Spinachia!" Said the page.

The guards parted to let the three hooded figures enter. They strode forward with smooth methodical strides, their bare feet silent on the smooth marble. The two shorter cloaks walked in front, making way for their tall, solemn brother, who followed closely behind. They were clad from head to toe in enormous cowls of a dark green color, that shrouded any features on their face, hung far over the ends of their hands, and trailed on the floor.

The king looked up from a small figure by his throne as they entered. "Father Spinochza!" He cried in surprise. "To what do I owe this unexpected honor? I did not know you wished to speak with me!"

The tall figure inclined his head. "No one ever expects the Spinach Inquisition, much less the Head Inquisitor." His arms came back and he threw back his hood, revealing a thin face with skin so pale as to be almost green. "But I did not plan to visit you either, your majesty, had word not reached my ear of a most unusual visitor your majesty was entertaining."

The king nodded eagerly. "Indeed, you are correct, holy father. Behold!" He swept aside. "Brother Hoagie, of the order of the Green Leaf, has left the side of his unholy brethren and come to seek our counsel as he progress down the Path of the Garden."

Hoagie, in a similar robe, bowed deeply. "Ah, brother Spinachoza! I have heard much of your love for the green leaf, and how ardently you have served its cause."

"Indeed, brother Hoagie." The tall, sallow monk dipped his head in acknowledgement. "I am proud to serve the Spinach." He arched a thin eyebrow. "I have heard much of you also, Brother Hoagie."

"Oh, uh, you have, huh?" Hoagie chuckled nervously.

"Indeed." Deep green eyes burned into Hoagie. "My brothers have told me of your service to and love of the green leaf. I have also heard much of your devotion to your friends in the KND, and your valiant rescue of them from our Inquistion."

"Oh, yes." Hoagie twiddled his thumbs. "But, brother Spinachoza, that was a looooooong time ago! I have since seen the errors of my ways, and now realize the true beauty of the Garden path!"

"Brother Hoagie has come to us, offering his assistance in spreading the message of the leafy green throughout all lands." The king explained. "He wishes especially to help the Armada in their noble Crusade against the Kids Next Door."

"Blessed be the Leaf." Spinachoza inclined his head in thanks, but seemed unsatisfied. "Tell me, holy brother, why you have so suddenly seen the light? What has suddenly fired you with this passion to serve Spinach for the world?"

Hoagie shuffled his feet a little anxiously. "Oh, noble brother, I have always been filled with a passion for the green leaf. Day and night I have meditated on its ways. Gladly would I have left my life and devoted it to the service of Spinach, however, I thought to turn my fellows in the KND to the path with kind words and deeds, so as to fire them with a similar desire."

"A noble ideal, brother Hoagie, if unfortunately naïve." Broke in Father Spinachoza. "Continue, I pray you."

"Yet, after much time, my fellow children remain defiantly rooted to the ways of sugar." Hoagie bowed his head in dramatic sorrow. "I fear that there is little more I can do but seek further means to show them the light."

Spinachoza nodded approvingly. "The path you have chosen is the way that many here have walked before, my son. Truly the world is crazed with the destructive habits of sugar."

"Even so." Hoagie shuffled his hands nervously, trying to think of more lines from old Robin Hood movies. "They have all returned unto the wild."

All three monks bowed their heads in sorrow. Hoagie quickly followed suit, while the king stood nervously behind, waiting.

Finally Spinachoza raised his head, signaling the others to do so. "Truly you have followed the way of many before you, Brother Hoagie. We must install you into the Spinach Inquisition at once."

"Oh, but Holy Father!" broke in the king. "The empire has need of this boy! Amerigo Vespinachio could use his knowledge of the KND to finish our crusade!" He looked anxiously at Hoagie. "Brother Hoagie and I were thinking, with the small amount of time available, and considering he has already been inducted once before…"

"That induction was under unusual circumstances, and was not backed up either by the district bishop or myself." Spinachoza's voice came soft and low, and he was smiling. "Moreover, it was revoked after Brother Hoagie's unfortunate… relapse." He bowed his head to the king. "While you are correct, your majesty, we must first re-instate him before we can permit him to return to his devotions."

The king played around with the scepter in his hand. "But… Father Spinachoza… the Armada…" He stopped, dithered a moment, and then desperately charged on. "We will need him if we are to invade the KND! His knowledge of the enemy could hasten our victory and help to spread the blessed leaf to all lands!"

"Indeed." Spinachoza nodded. "That is why there is need for haste, your majesty."

* * *

Hoagie twiddled his thumbs anxiously. How had he gotten roped into this? Numbuh 5 hadn't said anything about this at all. Hoagie was supposed to go in there, get into the king's confidence, infiltrate the armada, and then work at leading them on wild goose chases across the Atlantic until some plan could be developed. Nobody had mentioned anything about a Spinach Inquisition intiation rite(which probably wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't confused it with the one they used to do in Artic training. Spinachoza had looked very unpleased with his question about feathers and peanut butter.). Now he was stuck doing "devotions" for a hour or so.

Hoagie risked peeking out from beneath his lids. The monk on the left of him looked asleep. The monk on the right was awake, and glancing about, but seemed badly distracted. They were supposed to watch him while he went through the ceremony.

He glanced forward toward the altar. He couldn't help but think it looked a lot like a kitchen cupboard. It had a massive golden bowl on the marble counter… er… top... er… whatever you called the smooth thing on the lid. He could see the long leaves poking out from the rim, lit by the green light that filtered through the tall windows behind.

Hoagie took a deep breath. _Pace yourself, Numbuh 2_. He told himself. _ Pace yourself_. There would be plenty of time for that later. Still, this was humoungously boring. He must've been sitting here for an hour, at least.

A sudden idea occurred to him. He glanced back at the monk. He kept glancing at the door just behind them, as if he had something he wanted to do.

Hoagie grinned. He bent his head, closed his eyes, and slowly, softly, began to snore. His first thought was to make sure the guard noticed it, but suddenly he thought better of it and simply let his head dangle down.

After a few moments of heavy breathing(it made his head swim a little and made him feel all hot) Hoagie was rewarded with the swish of cloth and the light patter of bare feet on stone. The creak of hinges, the click of a latch, and Hoagie was home-free.

He reached up to his cowl and pressed a button on his airplane helmet. "Numbuh 5? You there?"

There was a moment of static. Hoagie waited, anxious, shifting his feet on the cold floor.

Finally, a voice came through, indistinct and groggy. "Numbuh 2? Is that you?"

"Yeah Numbuh 5, this is me." Hoagie nodded eagerly. "I…"

"Have you any idea what time it is over here, fool!?" Hoagie winced at the sudden outburst. "Numbuh 5 was sleeping when you called her up!" A little groan, and then. "What're you callin' for anyway?"

"Um… actually, kinda just cause I was bored." Hoagie tried a charming smile, quite forgetting that she couldn't see him through the communicators they had.

"Cause you were bored?" Abby's voice was maybe a whisper, but it had all the effect of a full-blown scream. "You woke Numbuh 5 up for that?"

"Well… yeah. And we were supposed to check in about now."

Hoagie heard just the suggestions of a sigh. "Yeah, yeah. Okay. Watcha got?"

"Well, I found out that the head of the Inquistition is this guy called Baruchli Spinachoza." Hoagie whispered. "And he's supposed to be the only one here who really likes spinach. He's the one who makes everyone else eat it."

"Yeah, that's what they said about the king."

"No, but he does!" Hoagie insisted. "He eats the stuff morning, noon, and night."

A silence. "That's creepy. What kinda fool actually eats that stuff?"

"I do!"

"Oh, tha's helpful" A snort. "Anyway, what else about him?"

"I think he's the one who actually got them onto the KND." Hoagie whispered. "I think he's the one making the moves here."

"Hmph." Numbuh 5 didn't sound impressed. "Well, do you got anything on their plans yet?"

"Ummm…." Hoagie glanced around the chapel. "Well, I'm not exactly 'in' yet."

"Oh please." Abby's exasperation came through clearly. "How hard can it be? You're already a membuh of that stupid little party, ain'tcha?"

"Well… yes… and no." Hoagie toyed with the loose cloth on his sleeves. "It seems I still have some ceremonies to go through."

"Ceremonies?" Abby sighed. "Numbuh 2, what have they got you doing right now?"

"Just… I'm in a room with a bowl of Spinach. They refill it every couple hours, and its all I can eat for a week or so. They have two monks here watching me."

There was a long silence on the other end. Hoagie glanced back to the door. No one yet, not even a sound. He was still safe.

Finally Numbuh 5 spoke. "Man! Sorry to hear that, brother. Numbuh 5 just had to eat a big chunka candy for her thing, but if you gotta eat that stuff…"

"I don't mind it!" Hoagie exclaimed. "It's not really all that bad, once you get used to it!"

"Yeah, whatever." Abby sounded unconvinced. "Just make sure you get it done right. And try to speed it up, huh? We don't want anything more happenin' while we're undercover."

"I don't know how I can speed this up at all." Hoagie whined. "It's a week long, they don't let anybody out except to…"

"Oh, just do it, Numbuh 2." Numbuh 5 snapped. "Must be some way."

"I… but…" Hoagie glanced around the room. "Oh, all right. I'll think of something."

"Good." A rather cavernous yawn. "Numbuh 5 is going to bed now."

Hoagie winced. "Right. Sorry for waking you up like that."

"Aw, no big deal, Numbuh 2." Hoagie could have sworn he heard Abby smile. "Numbuh 5 wuz having nightmares anyway. Shouldn'ta eaten so many sweets before bedtime."

"Heh. Right." Hoagie chuckled. "Goodnight then."

Another yawn. "G'night, Numbuh 2."

Then a click, and the transmission was gone. Hoagie brought his hand down from his head and sighed. Now what was he supposed to do? He glanced about. The one monk was still gone. Things weren't going to get more interesting for a while yet.

He took another look at the gold bowl and sighed. Well, it would give him something to do for a while, anyway. He stood up, straightened his cloak, and walked up to the bowl.

* * *

Fanny Fullbright, Global Tactical Head, sat behind her desk, frantically shifting through forms and applications. How did 65.3 keep track of all this, anyway? Only a boy would have thought of such an idiotic way to keep things.

Something beneath the mountains of paperwork started beeping. Fanny ignored it.

It kept beeping.

She picked up a paper and started scribbling on it.

The beeping grew louder, more insistent.

Fanny let out a Gaelic curse and swept the layers of papers and carbon copies off her desk. She scanned the thousand screens and dials, trying to locate the disturbance.

When she finally did, her eyes grew big and wide.

Her hand shot out and punched a small red button next to an insignificant-looking speakerphone. The radio crackled into life.

"'Bout time." The voice on the other end commented. "What you doin' up there anyway, girl?"

"Don't take that tone of voice with me, Numbuh 5!" Fanny glowered at the speaker, hoping to stare the voice into submission. "You're an hour or so late for your scheduled check-in!"

"Yeah, whatever." Numbuh 5 sounded disinterested. "Listen, sister, Numbuh 5 got into the pirates crew all right, but she ain't first mate. She's gonna have ta start from the bottom."

"Well, work with it." Fanny shrugged her shoulders. "We don't have all the time in the world, y'know. Just see what you can do in that position."

"Gotcha." The voice paused a moment, then said. "Listen, Numbuh 86, somethin' weird is goin' on down here. Sticky's all worried about Heinie all of a sudden, an' he ain't sayin' why. He ain't the type to go after crew mates who deserted to go after treasure-huntin'. Somethin's up."

Fanny snorted. "Just focus on the mission, Numbuh 5. If it helps you get Stickybeard to the battle, fine, but otherwise don't get side tracked. Has Numbuh 2 checked in yet?"

A sigh. "Now, 'bout that…"

* * *

There was one last leaf in the bowl.

Hoagie stood up on his toes, stretching out his arm, straining with his fingers to pick it out. He hadn't meant to eat all the spinach, but he had been so bored, and once he had started, it had been so good, and he had just kept right on, and before he quite knew what he was doing… well, it was mostly gone, and he might as well finish it off.

His chubby little fingers stretched out, wandering hopelessly in the air. They brushed the edge of the leaf, sliding it further down. Hoagie groaned and tried again.

His fingers touched the leaf, trapping it to the smooth gilded surface. Slowly, his fingers worked the leaf back to him. Hoagie grinned in satisfaction. He grabbed the leaf and stuffed it into his mouth.

"Very impressive, brother Hoagie." The simple words shattered the idle quiet of the chapel.

Hoagie whirled around, a piece of Spinach still dangling from his mouth, to face Father Spinachoza. The long, thin monk was standing at the door, a limp hand laid against his chin as if he were thinking. The monk who had left stood next to him, nervous, apparently waiting for something.

Spinachoza's gaze fell on the sleeping monk. "Brother Cail!" He cried. Cail, still kneeled on his prayer mat, started and came awake. Realizing his position, the monk turned and began to offer profuse apologies. "I beg pardon, holy father, I did not mean, it was not… I shall offer…"

Spinachoza waved dismissively. "It is forgotten, brother Cail. Even the Saints themselves fell asleep in the garden. Spinach has turned your folly into his own good, for by it we have discovered a most interesting circumstance. Retire to your cell, I pray you, and fast for seven days."

"Yes, Father Spinachoza." The monk slipped on his own feet in his hurry to leave. Spinachoza motioned to the one at his elbow, who bowed his head and left, leaving Hoagie alone with Father Spinachoza.

The chapel was completely silent. Spinachoza remained at the door, contemplating the little monk at the altar. Hoagie, for his part, was scared stiff and couldn't move. The green light shone down through the window, illuminating Hoagie and casting the priest's features into shadow.

Father Spinachoza spoke first. "So, Brother Hoagie, you like Spinach."

Hoagie started to reply, realized he still had food in his mouth, quickly gulped it down, then nodded.

"Hmmm." The holy Father took a step forward. He did not move into the light, but rather began to pace around the narthex, studying Hoagie from all angles. "Do you know, Brother Hoagie, that most monks here wait in prayer and fasting for several days until hunger drives them to eat the spinach?"

Hoagie found his voice. "Oh, uh, really?" He grinned hopefully. "Well, imagine that, haha!"

"Very few," the priest continued to circle him, "actually eat anything from the first bowl when it is put out." He stopped, as close as he could get to Hoagie without entering the light. "Do you know why, Brother Hoagie?"

"Uh… Because they're not supposed to?" Hoagie tugged at his robe a little awkwardly. He was not feeling very comfortable right now.

Father Spinachoza leaned into the light and smiled. "Because they lack the proper devotion, brother Hoagie. They do not truly love the Spinach, they seek only the fame and reputation that comes with being part of the Spinach Inquisition."

"You," Father Spinachoza stepped up to Hoagie and put his hand on his shoulder. "You are different. You actually love the spinach, with a passion that few here possess."

"I… I do?" Hoagie's forehead wrinkled in puzzlement, then suddenly cleared. "Oh, I do!"

Spinachoza smiled. "Yes, you do, Hoagie. Rarely do we find someone with such love for the green leaf."

"Come." Spinachoza turned him to the door. "The remainder of the preparation can quite easily be skipped over. We shall ordain you without further delay. The church must not stand on ceremony where commitment in such evidence."

"Oh sure!" Hoagie nodded eagerly. "And then, I go to help the Spinach Armada, right?"

Father Spinachoza laughed softly. "No, my brother, I think we shall have more useful tasks for you here."

The tall, thin monk and the short, fat boy walked down the hall and disappeared around the corner.

* * *

Whew, finally. This chapter took a while. Things are heating up where I am, but I still hope to continue updating—as long as you all keep reviewing, of course!

This part had me a little antsy, just because so much of it follows actual authentic devotional statements or religouspeak. I have a great respect for the church and its instituitions, and I hope I didn't make anyone think I was making fun of them.

Some of my reviewers have asked for a little more 1x362. The story is mostly 2x5, but I'll try to get back to our commanders in the next chapter.


	5. Breach of Trust

A/N: To better understand this chapter, stop here and read my earlier story, "Loyalties" before going on.

* * *

"So Numbuh 2 is now fully in the confidence of the Spinach Inquisition, but is not actually working with the armada." Numbuh 362 rubbed her eyes. "For some reason I was hoping we could get things done faster."

"That's what ya gotta deal with when you got a stupid BOY working on these things." Numbuh 86 nodded confidently. "Numbuh 5, you'll notice, hasn't had a problem."

"Actually, Numbuh 5 is almost farther behind than 2." Rachel picked up a paper and studied it. "Numbuh 2 is at least relatively close to the leadership. Numbuh 5 is still just a deckhand." Rachel allowed herself a glow of satisfaction before she quashed it for being unfitting for a freind. For some reason she could not exactly pin down, Fanny's tirades had started to grate on her nerves recently.

"But Numbuh 5 is closer to the action!" Fanny protested. "She can take more direct action! Last week she said she and the crew took down Father's ice-cream reservoir!"

"Yes, yes." Rachel nodded wearily. "Anyway, it doesn't look like there's a whole lot we can do right now. Take 20,000 and his men from red alert and have them refit at the undersea lab."

"Aye, ma'am." Numbuh 86 picked up the papers and folded them away.

"And destroy those reports." 362 pointed. "The last thing we need is someone stumbling across this information. After you leave, wait for five minutes and then take the cameras off the tape you plugged in."

"Yes ma'am." Fanny nodded and made a move to the exit, but stopped suddenly. "Ah, sir…"

"Yes, Numbuh 86?" Rachel had already started shuffling the papers on her desk. She signed one and set it aside.

"About… that trainee thing…" Rachel's head came up. "Y'know, with me old job and all." Numbuh 86 let out a little laugh. "I ah… I saw Cadet Mushi passed the tests."

"Yes…" Rachel nodded slowly. "She was the highest scoring in the selection process and we're moving onto more specialized training. What about it?"

"So… um…" Fanny paused a bit. "She's the new Head of Decommissioning, then?"

"More or less." Rachel was playing about with the pencil on her desk. "She's pretty much a sho-in for the job. Still, we haven't installed her yet." She picked up the pencil and signed another paper. "She still has a great deal of training to go through."

"Right." Fanny nodded, slowly. "So, ah… you still sure you don't need my help in any way?" She smiled tentatively. "You know, like with the training or anything?"

Rachel chewed on her lip a moment. "No, I don't think so. Numbuh 65.3 and I have the matter well in hand, and we're bringing in some other experts to teach her combat techniques and protocols and so on."

"Well, it just seems…" Fanny paused at the door, papers in hand. "it just seems a little strange that you wouldn't want me to help with it at all…"

There was a little silence in the command center. Rachel played around with her pencil. Fanny watched her anxiously. "You know… since I used to have the position, I think I could teach her some things…"

Rachel sighed and pushed back her chair from her desk. She came out from behind it and walked over to Numbuh 86. She put her hand on Fanny's shoulder. "Fanny," she said, giving her head a little toss to clear the hair from her eyes. "You were the head of decommissioning for, what now, eight years?"

"Ten, if ya count the junior program I helped out with." Fanny nodded.

"Was it always an easy job?" Rachel looked at her friend.

Fanny blinked once or twice, rather suddenly. "Of course it wasn't _easy_, ma'am." Her face had turned to adamant. "But I was ordered by Numbuh 100 himself to police the Kids Next Door and make sure of the future of KND, and I followed it out."

"It wasn't easy." Rachel nodded. "But you did a fine job of it. We've never had such a strict watchdog before, and we've had a real decrease, percentage-wise, in the level of operatives who've gotten away."

"Fanny…" Rachel chewed her lip a moment and looked away a bit before going on. "We appreciate all you've done, but we know you must have bad memories associated with the decommissioning chamber."

"Actually…" Fanny began, but Rachel cut her off. "You've had to take down friends, mentors, and lovers, and that can't be good for you. So…" Rachel took a deep breath, apparently struggling. "We decided to give you a rest from it all. A nice, quiet, desk job, where you can do what you're good at without having to remember all you went through."

Fanny's iron jaw trembled a moment. Rachel looked down, then back up. "That's why we don't want you helping with the new trainee, Fanny. That life's behind you now. We don't want to have you go back to it."

There was a silence. Rachel kept her steady gaze locked on Fanny's wavering eyes, watching the officer digest all the information.

Finally, Fanny seemed to come to a decision. She nodded, wordlessly, and ducked out. The metal, jaw-like doors clanged shut mercilessly behind her.

Rachel sighed. Her shoulders slumped, her erect head lowered, her knees bent just slightly, and her eyes closed momentarily. With a listless movement about her, she walked over back to the desk, sat in the tiny desk chair, and let her head fall into her hands.

The crackle of a radio disturbed her thoughts. "Numbuh 362, you all done up there? I can't keep up this business of Substitute Soopreme Leader for long."

Numbuh 362's head came up and her hand came out to press the intercom switch. "Just give me five minutes, Patton."

The intercom signaled an affirmation and clicked into silence. Rachel shoved herself out of her chair and walked to the center of the room. The Sooper Soopreme Leader's Chair rose from it, towering high above the tiny girl who was supposed to occupy it.

Rachel looked up and groaned. She let herself fold into a sitting position on the base and fell against the heavy iron beam that supported the chair. Her head rolled back and hit the metal with a thud.

She could've sat like that forever. The thirty seconds she got before the doors swished open were not nearly enough.

A glance back, however, suddenly made all that seem unimportant. She jumped to her feet and tried to appear commanderly.

"Numbuh 1 reporting for duty, sir." The operative came up and saluted.

"At ease." Rachel turned to him with a nod. "Report?"

"Basic training in the field of hand-to-hand combat administered to Cadet Mushi." Nigel folded his hands behind his back, poised and ready. "Cadet appeared confused, but am confident that she will pick it up, with more training. Having finished, made full report to Numbuh 65.3 and came up to central command to see if there's any action I could help with."

"No incidents reported." 362 shook her head. She neglected to mention that the incidents wouldn't have gone here in any case. "Sorry to disappoint. Thank you for coming up on such short notice."

"Least I could do." Numbuh One shrugged. "After all, it's a relative of my team I'm training, and a member who I'm replacing."

"Why couldn't Numbuh 4 come down?" 362 tilted her head. "Is he getting tired of the sessions? Because we can get another if he…"

"I'm sure **he **wouldn't have minded coming." Nigel raised an eyebrow. "But Numbuh Three seemed rather keen to keep him at the treehouse today. Some television program she needs him for, or something like that. Numbuh three has been rather down lately, what with Five on vacation and everything, so I just volunteered to smooth things over."

"Oh." Numbuh 4 had seemed awfully determined to stay when she called him up earlier, but she decided not to mention that. "Well, thank you all the same."

"Oh, my pleasure, Numbuh 362." Numbuh 1 watched the supreme leader as she left the pedestal and moved to the gigantic window to stare at the earth. "Sir… if I may ask you a question?"

"Please do." Rachel smoothed back her hair, not turning as he walked up beside her.

"I passed Numbuh 86 in the hallway." Nigel waited, without success, for his commander to comment before going on. "She seemed upset. Is there something going on I should know about?"

Rachel closed her eyes and sucked in her breath. Of all the things to ask about.

"Numbuh 86 has been under a lot of strain lately." She responded, hoping her voice was steady. "It's not so easy to move from a black-ops position like the Head of Decommissioning to a more paper-pushing style job like Global Tactical Commander." She stared out into the starry darkness. "It's nothing for you to worry about."

"Was it hard for you?"

Rachel turned to stare the surprisingly nonchalant boy. "What?"

"When you moved from Global Commander to Soopreme Leader." Nigel did not turn his gaze from the window. "Back then, Global Commander was a kind of black-ops position too."

Rachel turned back to the window. "Things have gotten more… complicated since then, Numbuh 1"

She remained silent for a moment, apparently mulling over his question. "It… was a shock. A good shock, though. Kind of like when your little brother turns the hose on you when you're just laying around in the sun."

Nigel smiled.

"It was… I don't know. At the time I was glad to stop dodging around, stop having to hide, and just stand up at the front of the helm. I could control what was going on, and I could meet the enemy face to face, not sneak up and around him before stabbing him in the back. And I didn't have to pull jobs anymore, like pretending I was a rogue teenager so I could take down KND operatives and hopefully join up with Father." She smiled. "I didn't have to live lies anymore. I had an honest job."

"You had to tell a lot of lies in that job, didn't you?" Nigel's voice floated in through her memories.

She came back to the conversation with a start. "Came with the territory. Spying and lying just go together. You can't really spy around effectively without getting your enemies trust. And you couldn't very well do that without lying to them." She snorted. "Didn't mean I liked it, mind you. I like to be more direct than that. But they were the enemy, and would've hurt us if I hadn't." She looked down. "I had to."

"Did you ever have to lie to a friend?"

Rachel whirled around to face him, but the complacent Brit was still staring out the window. Noticing her worry, he glanced over. "Back then. When you were a spy."

Rachel stared at him.

Finally she shrugged and looked away. "Once or twice. That one time I tried to get into Father's mansion I had to lie to a lot of operatives. Not really friends, but still fellow soldiers. But every so often, yeah, I had to lie to friends, to help out the Kids Next Door, or to keep them from danger." She played with the edge of her sweater. "That was the worst."

Nigel said nothing.

"Lying to friends…" Rachel's voice came a bit more hesitant, with a curious hoarseness. "It's awful. You… you look at them, and know that they respect you, and trust you. You realize they're willing to believe whatever you say, because you're their friend."

"And yet…" She rubbed her nose. "You have to just step all over those feelings. You need to take that trust and just rip it open, suck it dry, and throw it away." She paused for a few minutes, breathing heavily. It's… it's the absolute worse part of the job." Another moment of silence, and then she went on. "I try to make it better by getting as close to the truth as I can. A good spy shouldn't do that, I guess."

Nigel spoke. "I wonder…" he said. "If it isn't that very sensitivity that makes you so good at it."

Rachel looked over at him. He shrugged. "If the lies have a grain of truth in them, it makes them all the harder to detect, and all the more easy to believe."

Rachel shook her head.

"Rachel…" Her head came up at the use of her name. "I looked around while I was talking with Numbuh 65.3. I know what you're doing with Fanny."

Rachel froze.

"I did wonder why you chose such a young cadet to be head of decommissioning." Nigel studied her. "Now I know. The farther apart the heads are, the less people notice the pattern. Once the head turns twelve, they shuffle him to a useless desk position so he'll be no problems when the next head comes to collect him."

"Her." Rachel whispered to the window. "The head is a her."

"Her." Nigel corrected himself. "And not just any her."

Rachel hid her head in her hands. "It's awful." She whispered. "Fanny's annoying, I know, and half the personnel in KND hate her, but she's been a solid right hand to me my whole time here. And now that she's turning twelve…"

"Those are the rules." Numbuh 1 reminded her. "And as you've said yourself, as Kids Next Door operatives, we go by the rules."

"And real leaders don't stoop to changing our traditions." Rachel whispered. "Especially to suit their own desires."

"And also especially not to help their friends." Nigel nodded. "It's not hard to imagine Fanny running. She just loves her job too much, like Chad did before he left."

"Yes." Rachel replied. "Yes."

"We have to obey the rules." Nigel said. "Yet, the rules don't say we have to lie to our friends." He stared into space thoughtfully. "I wonder… if you told Fanny about the protocol, if the trust would keep her from running."

"I doubt it."

"I do too." Nigel turned and faced her. "Still, I'd like to think that you could trust your friends, and that your friends could trust you."

Rachel didn't say anything at first. She seemed to be thinking. "Nigel." She said. "um… you know how you were asking me, about Numbuhs 2 and 5…?

"Yes?" Nigel prompted.

"Well… it's… um…"

The radio crackled into life, breaking the conversation. "Numbuh 362?" Numbuh 60's voice came into the room. "It's been five minutes now. You ready to take over? I can't handle this anymore!"

Instantly Numbuh 362's face snapped back into commander mode. "Yes, Numbuh 60. I'm sorry. Re-establish control here."

She turned back to Nigel. "Yes, about Numbuhs 2 and 5, I was thinking, it's not right for me to take away two members of your team."

"Well, I know you have security concerns." Nigel nodded. "But it is hard to get on without them."

"Yes." Rachel nodded. "I realize that. So I've directed Numbuhs 202 and 205 to your sector to replace them. You can use them until it's safe for 2 and 5 to come back."

Nigel smiled. "Thank you. They will be a great help." He moved to the door. "I'd like to stay and talk longer, but I see you have some more work to do." He paused at the exit. "Was there anything else you needed to tell me?"

Numbuh 362, leader of the Kids Next Door, hesitated a moment. "No, not at all. Dismissed."

* * *

Read and Review! This story actually incorporated some suggestions from my reviewers, so if you have ideas of your own, send them in, and they might show up!

Sorry this one is late. Things getting busy where I am.

Just another note before any of the good writers out there kill me. Numbuh 1 is completely out of character in this story. He's way too serious, and he knows too much about what's going on. Numbuh 1 in the show is much more ridiculous. It's kinda hard, though, because every time he talks to Rachel in the show, he's dead serious, so how do you work with that?

Anyway. The story is still about 2 and 5, but the tag does say 1X362, and the two of them will have some interaction later, so I thought I should do more with them.


	6. Cracking Mysteries

Abby leaned over the side of the ship, staring at the surge and swell of the land it pushed through. She admired the way the moonlight glinted off the earth as the firm wooden prow plowed into it and pushed it up against the side. The comforting rumble and creak of the timbers filled the calm night air.

"Uh, miss, yu better not stand so close to the edge, ya might fall off and drown."

Abby rolled her eyes and cast an annoyed glance over her shoulder. Long John Stupid stood at the helm, a bewilderingly worried look on his face. "Look here, Long John, Abby is perfectly able to look after herself. And even if she did fall off, how the Sam Hill would she drown?"

"But uh…." Long John bit his lip anxiously. "Uh… de captain, uh… he said…"

"Sticky told Abby to stay away from the side cause he thinks Abby's gonna run off, not cause he's worried about me drownin'." Abby huffed her way to the wheel, glaring at Long John. "An' if I was gonna do that, I could have escaped ten times by now."

"But the captain…"

"Yeah, yeah…" Abby sighed. Long John was frustratingly simple-minded. "Abby'll stay away from the edge."

She dropped to the deck and pulled her knees up against her chest. The night air was rather chilly, if still invigorating. She looked down at herself a trifle distastefully. Stickybeard had insisted that she wear the baggy trousers and tattered shirt of all the pirates, though he had allowed her to keep the oversized red cap. On the whole, she thought it a rather ridiculous get-up, but a job was a job, and she had submitted without comment.

Stickybeard didn't trust her, she knew. Everywhere she went on the ship, there was always someone watching, and if she was ever asked to post watch or to explore inland, another pirate always came along with her. She had hoped to snoop around the ship during the night while everyone was asleep, but Sticky had assigned her to night watch with Long John, so that was out of the question.

Struck with a sudden thought, she looked up at the big pirate. Long John was more or less the first mate of the ship, and people weren't too careful with what they said around him.

"Hey, Long John," She ran her tongue over her teeth, considering. "So where's the captain shipping us off to, anyway?"

Long John peered down at her. "I dunno. He said to steer a course south by southwest, making for the straits of North Dakota."

"What for?"

Long John shrugged. "Cap'n didn't say."

Abby closed her eyes. Obviously this was going to take some digging on her part. Good thing Long John didn't seem like the suspicious type.

"So what's the captain want with little ol' Hiene?" She asked, staring idly off at the stars. "I thought he was plenty willin' to let him sleep with the fishes, last I heard."

Long John's eyes grew very wide. He took a little step back, then forward, then rested himself against the wheel and began to restlessly drum his fingers on it. "Uh, where'd ya get that idea? The cap'n couldn't care less about that little pipsqueak!"

Abby rolled her eyes. "Brother, you are a step behind on the times here. Abby figured it all out on her first day here, and you idiots just as much told her she was correct the way you reacted." She paused and looked up at John. "An' if she did have any doubts left, they're gone now. You're the worst liar this side of Louisiana."

Long John's big mouth quivered. "Aw, that's a mean thing for you to say…"

Abby stared at him, getting slowly to her feet. "It just an insult, Long John. Don't mean nothin'."

"B-b-b-but you said I wasn't a good liar!" Long John blubbered. "A-a--and the cap'n says, every pirate has to be able to tell a good lie!"

"Ain't never heard that before." Abby muttered. "Kinda makes sense, I guess. Hey, calm down, can't ya?" Long John had entered on a fresh series of sobs.

"Aw, he'll wake the whole ship if he keeps this up." Abby cast a hasty glance back to the hatch. "Look, I'm sorry what I said, okay? I was wrong, you're a great liar. Just… not as good as I am, thas all."

Long John wiped a raspberry-sized teardrop from his eye. "W—wh-what did you say?"

"Abby said she's sorry." Abby growled. "Now quiet down, huh?"

He stared at her with wide eyes, like seeing a completely new idea. "N-n-nobody ever said that to me before…" He mumbled.

"Well, Abby's saying it now." Abby crossed her arms and glared at him. "Just don't do that… cryin' thing again."

A sniff, and a nod, and Long John was feeling better.

There was a short silence, with nothing but the sound of the dirt sprinkling on the sides and the gentle heave of the ship.

Abby glanced down at her shoes, irritated. "So why does he want to get Hiene?"

"Oh, that's easy." Long John looked down at her fondly. "But didn't the Cap'n tell you? I ain't supposed to tell you nothing."

Abby's eyes narrowed. "No-o-o-o." She said. "Bu-u-ut the Cap'n did say you would fill me in on the details. He was goin' to bed when I asked him."

Long John chuckled. "Aw, I'm not that stupid, miss. You can't trick me! Cap'n gave strict orders I wasn't to tell you anythin' about him going after little Heinrich!"

Abby smiled. "An' why didn't the cap'n want you to tell Abby about little ol' Hiene? He ain't that important a person, ya know."

"Well, I'll tell ya somethin'." Long John wagged his finger impressively. "The cap'n didn't say. But I've got ears, I have, and I hear lots that goes on around the ship."

"Do yah now?" Abby looked at the pirate with an engaging smile. "An' what kinda stuff does you hear around the ship, Long John?"

"Oh lotsa stuff. Bubblosa has a muther back in Barbados that he writes to every week, an' Nouh and Latier have a sweetheart back in Paris that they've been fightin' over fer years, and Snickers, the cook, hates the very name of salt, an'"

"Yeah, yeah…" Abby waved a hand and cut him off before he could go into the detailed lives of every pirate on board. "But what did you hear from the Cap'n about Heinrich?"

"Oh!" Long John's florid face cleared of confusion. He leaned over the wheel and laid a finger alongside his bulbous nose. "Well, Long John was swabbin' the decks, see? Tha's when we takes lotsa water, and scrubs the deck…"

"Yeah, yeah!" Abby cut him off again. "I wuz 'swabbin the deck' just yesterday! Go on."

"Well, Long John wuz swabbin the decks—cleanin' em, miss—when, as he's passin' by the captain's cabin, he hears some voices." Long John nodded at her impressively. "Now, I ain't the type to eavesdrop—it's rude and me mommy said so—but the cap'n has a habit a' standin' just outside his cabin to see if we all be doin' our work, and it makes a nasty peppermint stain right outside his door."

Long John paused to make sure Abby was following his story. "So, Long John was trying as hard as he could to clean the deck—what we pirates calls 'swabbin', miss—and he was standing just outside and listenin' to the voices as he works. An' the cap'n, he says: 'Iffen I can just get me old cabin boy outta prison, then I'll get the Pearly Whites, is that what yer sayin'? An' the other voice, all low and scratchy, says, yes, Cap'n, tha's what I'm saying. And then the Cap'n says, why, I'd sail the whole world over to find them Pearly Whites! And then…"

"Yeah, yeah, and then?" Abby studied the pirate eagerly.

"Then Long John sees a big gob o' gum stuck to the mast, an' he goes over there to clean it off." Long John smiled at her. "So ya see why the Cap'n wants to find Heinrich? He wants the Pearly Whites!"

"But…" Abby struggled for a graceful way to hide her ignorance, then gave it up. "What the heck is a pearly white anyway?"

"Don't you know?" Long John stared her askance. "But every Candy Pirate knows! The Pearly Whites be a set of false teeth made by the famous Carmel Chichimec King, Marmeluza!"

"Oh… right." Abby rolled her eyes. The teeth were a popular legend, but little more among the treasure hunters of the world. It was said that the Chichimecs had so much caramels, that their king began to lose too many teeth. So, to make up for the ones he lost, King Marmeluza made a set of teeth of pure hard sugar. The sugar would never dissolve, and made anything you ate get only sweeter—a candy-lovers dream, in fact.

King Marmeluza was reported to have died of diabetes days after receiving the false teeth, but that was a point of minor importance to Candy Hunters.

"When Marmeluza died," Long John explained. "his people buried him with the teeth still in him, but many people dug it up since then to try and find it. But it's gone! No one knows where the Pearly Whites are to this day!"

"Uh-huh. Abby knows the story." Abby studied her enthralled storyteller. "But what's that got to do with Heine?"

"I don't know." Long John scratched his ear thoughtfully. "But Long John's been thinking, and he thought… maybe, since Hienrich is a treasure hunter, the Cap'n wants him to go find these Pearly Whites for him."

"As if Hiene would even give them to him." Abby huffed, crossing her arms and muttering at the sky. "He never could get the whole idea of 'a great candy taken in greed turning sour.' And anyway, why's the captain want a set of false teeth for? It's not like he doesn't… have…" Abby stopped, realizing something. "Aw, man."

Long John nodded. "Have ya noticed? The captain's loosing his teeth, one by one. He only has two now, and one of them wiggled last night. I heard it. I was swabbin' the decks (that's mopping them, miss), and I hears this scream…"

"Oh, yeah." Abby stopped the story before it could get out of hand. "I get it. An' he wants Hienrich to find him a new set."

Long John nodded sadly. "It's a pity we gotta go looking for Hienrich first." He gazed out at the sea mournfully. "The cap'n's going fast, and if we don't find it soon, he'll be sugar-free afore ya know it! We ain't gonna find that treasure overnight, ya know!"

"Yeah, ya can say that again." Abby stared into the night absentmindedly. She actually doubted they would _ever_ find the treasure, but she decided not to mention that. Slowly, however, an idea formed in her head.

"Ya know." Abby swung round to face the Pirate. "Abby's somethin' of a treasure hunter herself."

"You are?' Long John stared at her with complete, open-mouthed astonishment.

"Yeah, sure." Abby nodded. "Even beat Hiene to some of the greatest treasures of the world. Abby's a great treasure hunter."

"Well, then…." Long John's hand flew about his face, scratching, picking, rustling, rubbing. "Well…" He settled for rubbing the back of his neck. "Well, then, you could help us find the Whites!"

"Hey now!" Abby exclaimed, as if suddenly struck with this idea. "Thas true, ain't it now! Abby guesses she could!"

"Oh yippee!" Long John gave a little hop and clapped his hands

"She ain't been hunting for years, of course, so she might need to wander around a bit and git her bearings a bit, " Abby considered. "But she could probably get started on something if she got back to some of her old haunts."

"Oh!" Long John exclaimed, greatly excited. "I can help! I'm the ship's pilot! I can take this ship wherever you need to go!"

"Really?" Abby glanced up. "You're the only person who knows how to pilot this rig?"

"Oh yeah!" Long John nodded vigorously. "Half the crew doesn't even know where we are now, and the cap'n doesn't bother with maps or anything like that!"

"Really!" Abby raised an eyebrow. "Then tell ya what, brother. What say you and me keep all this here quiet, just between ourselves, and we'll look for these here Whites without telling ol' Sticky anything!"

"Oh, I get it!" Long John gave her a beaming smile. "It'll be a surprise!"

"Oh yeah." Abby smiled. "A surprise."

* * *

Abby was just getting to bed when a little buzzing sounded in her ear. She wearily brought up her sleeve to her mouth. "Yo, Numbuh 2, what's up?"

She heard a high, nasal voice in her ear. "Eh, not much Numbuh 5. What's up with you?"

"Not much." She waited for Numbuh 2's yawn to diminish. "Numbuh 5 found out why Sticky wants Hiene."

"That's great." Another yawn. "Just great."

"That ain't all, Numbuh 2." Abby leaned closer to the microphone. "Abby's got a way to control where the ship goes from now on. As soon as you get a way to control the Spinach Armada, let Abby know, and I'll send in the pirates."

"Oh yeah." Hoagie's voice cleared. "Yeah, that might be a little difficult. Right now they've got me working at some kind of library position."

"Library?"

"Oh yeah!" The voice took on a sudden excitement. "They've got a huge library here! It's really cool! I'm learning about physics, and chemistry, and the history of the Yipper card game, and…"

"Yeah, yeah." Abby cut him off. At least he was having fun. "But you haven't gotten anywhere with directing the navy?"

"Uh…" There was a long pause. "No."

Abby sighed. This might take a while. Apparently there was something of a hierarchy in the Spinach Inquisition. "Well, get a move on with that. Let Abby know when you're ready."

"Okay." Another short silence, and then. "How are you doing, Numbuh 5?"

Abby looked at the microphone in surprise, as if she could read Hoagie's expression. "Uh… okay, I guess. Why do ya ask?"

She could have sworn the microphone shrugged. "I dunno. I'm just bored over here. It's kinda lonely.

"Oh." Abby thought about that a moment. "Well, I guess I'm doing all right then. Most of the guys here are pretty cool, and I'm seeing a lot of the country. There's a guy here called Long John…" she paused a minute. Why was she talking about this? "Uh…. Never mind, okay? Abby's doing fine. How are you?"

"Oh pretty good. I'm learning all sorts of new stuff here, and the food is great. The monks here are lots of fun ." Hoagie's voice took on a more excited tone. "There's a guy called Gregor Mendell—he made the brussel sprout bombs—and another fun guy named Gus Aspara, who knows all about catapults and stuff. Spinachoza's a neat guy too Do you know he can speak over twenty different languages?"

"No, Abby didn't know that." She yawned. "Well, sounds like you're having a fun time, Number 2, but Abby needs to get to bed."

"Okay." She heard a little click on the other side. "See you tomorrow."

"See ya." She switched off hers. She was about to climb into the hammock when Long John leaned over.

"Are ya serious about helping me find the Pearly Whites?" He asked, in a thunderous whisper.

Abby winced. "Yeah, Abby'll help ya." She sighed, swinging herself into the hammock and grabbing her blanket. "Don't worry about that."

"Oh, I'm so glad." Long John smiled. "I've just been so worried about the cap'n. I can't think of anything worse than loosing your teeth, can you?"

"No." Abby agreed, snuggling deeper into the covers.

"I mean." Long John searched for the right words. "It's like… candy's the only thing that makes life happy sometimes, you know? It helps you forget all the problems you have."

Abby's head came out from the covers, staring at him.

He looked at her hopefully. "You know what I mean?"

She nodded slowly. "I do, Long John. Abby knows exactly what you mean."

* * *

YEEHA! At last.

I'm so lazy. I need to get to work on these things.

This was a fun chapter to write. I went out on a long walk and came back with all sorts of great ideas, so hang on for the later chapters.

Keep reviewing, and I will keep writing! Reviews are the guiding light of my existence, the cup of water in the dry desert of my life! Review and I shall be in your debt forevermore!


	7. Different kinds of Love

Hoagie leant over the enormous book, blinking awkwardly. The text was tiny, confusing, and, he was prepared to believe, all in Greek. How the Inquisition intended for him to memorize all these ancient texts was beyond him.

He felt a momentary glimmer of gratitude that the monks had allowed him to keep his goggles once they realized he could barely see without them. His cap, however, they had taken. Hoagie reached up a hand to touch the unfamiliar reddish-brown tendrils that sprouted from his head. He had NO idea what to do with them. He supposed he would have to cut them eventually, if Mum weren't around.

Again he bent over the ponderous leather-bound work. Sunlight streamed in through the tall thin windows at the end, but the spaces between them were hid in huge, looming darkness. Hoagie had had to tug this particular volume into the light for the mere chance of reading it. He cast a doubtful glance back to the dark oaken bookshelves, shrouded in shadow against the stone.

It was a pity. This book looked really interesting. There was a diagram of some kind of flying instrument on it, one that apparently operated by a series of hand and foot cranks so the wings could flap. Kid's stuff, sure, but fascinating nonetheless. It looked quite promising, but Hoagie couldn't find out whether it had been tested or even built. He squinted in frustration at the garbled text.

A shadow fell over the page. "I think you will find Brother Caudflawer's English translation more helpful."

"Father Spinachoza!" Hoagie nearly fell off the seat in his hurry. He stood and bowed. "I did not know, holy father…"

"Do not call me holy." Spinachoza frowned. "There is only one that is holy, and that is not I."

Hoagie nodded quickly and confidently. "Yes, Holy Father."

Father Spinachoza stared at him for a moment with grave eyes.

Hoagie tilted his head. "What?"

Spinachoza shook his head and turned. "I was merely passing through to observe your work, Brother Hoagie. Please, be seated, and continue."

"Uhm… okay." Hoagie scrambled back to his seat and bent over the other book that Spinachoza had laid next to him. To his infinite relief, he could understand these letters, and bent to the study of Da Veggi and his wonderful inventions.

"You hunger after knowledge, do you not, Brother Hoagie?"

Hoagie looked up. Spinachoza's dark form was framed in the window, apparently observing something in the courtyard.

He shrugged. "Uh… I guess so."

"Why do you hunger after knowledge, brother?" Spinachoza turned to face him. "You do not seek the fame or notoriety it brings. You have no desire for the power that comes with it. There is no false pride within you that you seek to satisfy. Why then do you seek to know the unknown?"

Hoagie thought back to his conversation with Numbuh 86. "Um…. it's fun?" he shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know."

"Fun." Father Spinachoza smiled. "you do it because it is fun."

The tall priest paced down the lit aisle of light, slowly making his way to the table. "Do you know, brother Hoagie." He said, pursing his thin lips. "How exceedingly rare that is?"

"Ummmm…." Hoagie scratched his head again. Every time he talked with Spinachoza, he got a distinct impression of being immensely outmatched. "I… no, not really."

Spinachoza seemed to chuckle. He shook his head and looked to the ceiling. "Blessed ignorance." He whispered. "The boy does not even know his gift, and therefore is thrice gifted." He looked back down to Hoagie. "You seek ignorance because it is fun. You eat spinach because you find it tasteful to your mouth. You do the right things, Brother Hoagie, but more importantly, for the right reasons."

Hoagie stared at the taller priest. "Huh?"

Another chuckle. "Come." The priest motioned to the door. "Walk with me a ways, and let us talk as men together."

Hoagie shrugged his shoulders and moved forward. Spinachoza shut the door behind them, and the tall thin monk and the small fat boy walked down the stone passage. Hoagie's bare feet felt cold on the smooth slate, and he struggled to match the priest's sedate, even stride.

"What is goodness, brother Hoagie?"

He looked up at the grave face. The question was one he had answered often in the past few days, and he readily replied. "Goodness is to love the blessed spinach and spread the news of the green leaf to far distant lands."

Spinachoza nodded. "And what is it to love?"

Hoagie froze. This hadn't been in the shorter catechism. A multitude of humorous responses flew through his head, mostly associated with what ladies looked for, but he discarded them. "Love?" He squeaked. "Ummm… That's… uh… well, when you really like someone…."

"No." Spinachoza closed his eyes. "Not romantic love, Brother. What does it mean when it says 'to love the blessed spinach'?"

"Oh." Hoagie fumbled for a minute. "I guess… to like it and enjoy it in every way possible, as much as you can. It means that you are happy as long as you are around it."

"Yes." Spinachoza nodded. "And no."

"Huh?"

"Part of love is what you have mentioned." Spinachoza looked down at the boy. "The passion, the desire of a moment that so possesses some men when they are around women. This is what most people think of. But," He paused significantly. "It is not all."

Hoagie looked at the man, puzzled, as he went on. "Tell me." He said. "Do you love food?"

Hoagie blinked. "Uh… yeah. How did you know?"

"Does that mean," Spinachoza ignored the question. "that you immediately seize upon it and eat it whenever it is put in front of you?"

"Ummm……" Hoagie thought again. "Yeah."

"Wrong" Spinachoza bent to look at him. "When your mother cooks food, and you go in the kitchen, you do not eat the food, do you?"

"Sometimes."

Spinachoza closed his eyes. "But not always."

"No. Not always."

"And why is that, brother Hoagie?"

"Because…" Hoagie fumbled for words for a minute. "What's she's making is usually better then what she has right there."

"Exactly." Spinachoza nodded. "Do you still love the food?"

"Sure." Hoagie shrugged. "But I know it'll get better if I wait."

"In fact," Spinachoza rose back, smiling approvingly, "it is your very love for the food that compels you to wait, instead of eating it immediately."

"Yeah." Hoagie nodded. "I guess it is."

"Another question." Spinachoza began walking again. "When you seek knowledge in these… inventions of yours, do you like it?'

Hoagie stared. Spinachoza seemed to repeat himself a lot. "Of course I like it!"

"Does this love come in the momentary conception of the idea, or the detailed working out of its application?" The priest's step was calm, measured. "Is it more fun to think of a neat idea immediately or more enjoyable to work it out step by painful step?"

"It…." Hoagie stopped puzzled. Again he had a flashback.

"_The reason I play around with that stuff isn't because I want to be the best. The reason I play with it is because it's fun! If I didn't like it, I'd stop doing it."_

_Numbuh 86 snorted. "Don't tell me that. You work too hard at it for it to always be fun."_

"_I do not!" _

_Fanny glared at him._

"_Well…. Okay. It's not as much fun as it used to be. But it's a different kind of fun. It's harder, more obscure kind of fun, but it's deeper too, a… a… I don't know! It's still fun! Just… not the same kind of fun."_

"They…" Hoagie reached up a hand and played with his lip. "They're both fun, I guess. It's a quicker, wilder feeling when I first come up with an idea, but as I start to work it out, I lose steam and it gets to feel kinda boring. But as the parts come together and I see things working and I get closer and closer, I get a wonderful thrill, a sense that it's actually going to work out!" He looked up at Spinachoza, who was listening carefully. "They're both fun, but the second one is deeper, more… deserved, somehow."

Spinachoza nodded. "And because you go through so much of what you do not love, that makes the thing you do so much more love-worthy, does it not?"

"Yeah." Hoagie wrinkled his nose. "I guess. I'm not sure exactly what you said."

"Do you not see then," Spinachoza stopped suddenly and turned Hoagie to face him. "Do you not see then, that love sometimes compels us to do what we hate?"

Hoagie blinked up at the elder man in confusion. "I… I guess so."

Spinachoza nodded. "But your first answer was also right. Love is also the quickened passion, the anticipation of the pleasure that comes from the more prolonged study. Without the wild, erotic love, we should have little reason to pursue the deeper, more fruitful love. It is the marriage of the two that constitutes the true nature of love."

Spinachoza opened a door leading into a narrow spiral staircase and began to climb, Hoagie trailing behind. "Another question." Spinachoza did not turn his head. "Do you suppose most of the monks here truly love the Spinach, brother Hoagie?"

"I…" Hoagie gulped. "I am but a lowly brother, Father Spinachoza. I do not pretend to judge the hearts or minds of my fellow brothers."

He heard a barely contained sigh from the priest. "Your answer is both elevated and elusive, Brother Hoagie."

"Heh." Hoagie awkwardly rubbed the back of his head.

"You need not lie to guard your brothers." Spinachoza stepped up to another door and opened it. "I know my pupils too well to hope for too much from them. The greater part of the Inquisition hates the blessed spinach." He stepped out into another narrow hallway and motioned him to follow.

"Then… why…?" Hoagie struggled to find something politic and yet illuminating. "Why do they serve here? And why do you let them?"

"If Spinach would permit only perfect hands to serve him, the green leaf should be a long time in waiting." Spinachoza resumed his even, measured stride. "There is good work being done here, even if those doing it do not believe in it. However, there is another reason." He paused a moment. "Many of the monks here, brother Hoagie, do not love the Spinach as you do. They do not have the passion, the desire to eat it for its glorious sliminess. Some serve here for the glory of the position, others for the power, still others because their family wished it." Spinachoza furrowed his brow a moment in disapproval, then shook his head and continued. "But some, brother, some precious few, come to see the light. Often these few came for the same reasons as all the others, yet by degrees, as they engage upon the work, they come to love Spinach through that."

Spinachoza's voice lifted and a spring entered his step as he spoke. "Understand, Hoagie, these men still do not like the taste of Spinach, at least not at first. But because they realize the blessedness of the Green Leaf, these men struggle nobly on to eat the spinach, not because it is the fun thing to do, but because it is the right thing to do." He spread his arms wide. "And by so doing, many do grow to like the Spinach."

Spinachoza turned onto another spiraling set of stairs and began to climb. These were steeper, more rugged steps, and Hoagie got a distinct impression of being very high. "You see, Brother Hoagie, here we have a surplus of the calm, the reasoned love that comes with work and devotion. You have a surplus of the passionate, emotional love that gives drive to it. We can learn much from you."

Hoagie's step slowed. He didn't know if he liked the sound of that. "Oh, yeah?" He asked.

"Yes." Spinachoza stopped before another small oaken door and took a long ring of keys from his cloak. "And you also can learn much from us."

The lock clicked and Spinachoza swung the door open to the blinding light of day. He stepped out and motioned Hoagie to follow.

Hoagie climbed up the last few stairs and struggled up the threshold into the cold wind. He looked around and gasped.

He and Spinachoza stood upon the very tip of one of the highest towers of the Inquistion. The top of the tower was bare of parapets and stood open to the blast of the wind as it whipped at their green cloaks and tossed the cloth about them wildly. The lower parts of the castle could just be seen below, but they were clearly at a dizzying height. Yet that was not what held his attention.

In the center of this bare platform lay a light construction of wood and metal. Tiny gears and cranks lay in pieces at its side, and some half-finished wings of canvas flapped idly about. It was a partial copy of the drawing he had seen in the book far below.

"We monks are clever in our own way." Spinachoza paced around the strange craft, staring at it. "Yet this device has constantly evaded us. Try as we might, we simply cannot get it to fly."

He looked up at Hoagie. "Do you think you might be able to do something with it, Brother Hoagie?"

Brother Hoagie snapped out of his reverie. "Huh? What? I mean, oh yeah sure! When do you wish me to begin, holy father?"

* * *

Thank you for reading! Now go review so I know you did! Reviews give me strength to carry on and write more!

My apologies to all of you. I realize you read to get fun and exciting things happen, and then I hit you with a chapter like this one. Bummer. I'd like to say this is important character development, but mostly its just me having fun philosophizing on the nature of life. Fun for me, boring for you. Oh well.

Next chapter will be interesting, I promise! I have no idea what it'll be about, but it'll have global command and Sector V and their response to all this.

Oh, and there's a picture of 2 and Spinachoza talking. Check it out: .com/art/Separation-2-and-Spinachoza-66323314


	8. Divided Loyalties

"Numbuh 4! Cover Numbuh 202 while he disarms the device!" Numbuh 1 leapt behind some loose rubble and cocked his SLAPPER. "Numbuh 205 and I will provide the diversion. Numbuh 3!" He glanced up at the balcony. "Maintain your position! See if you can cut off their communications!"

"Okey dokey!" Numbuh 3 grinned cheerily, but dove backward as an ice cream ball smacked the railing. She threw a glance down and fired a teddy bear at the soldier. Numbuh 1 and 205 disappeared into the ventilation shaft.

"How did Father get a cruddy bomb in the Convention center anyway?" Numbuh 4 yelled to no one in particular.

"The soldiers brought it with them!" 202's fingers flew over the device. "They entered in here and planted it against the root system. Didn't you pay any attention to what Numbuh 1 was saying?"

"I heard him alright, I just… OW!" Numbuh 4 dodged left and ducked down, wiping a strawberry scoop from his arm. "Aw, man, I can't feel me arm now!" He popped back up and sent a squirt of mustard at the door. "Take that, A-Dolts!" Glancing back, he yelled. "How much longer that gonna take?"

"Easy, Numbuh 4." Numbuh 202, a short, skinny kid with pale skin and whitish hair, picked at the wires. "I'm just about done here. I'd like to see YOU try to disarm this thing."

Numbuh 4 glared at him, but suddenly whirled around to face the hallway. "Aw, crud!" He wailed.

A fresh platoon of Ice-Cream troopers had rounded the corner, armed to the teeth. Numbuh 4 cast an anxious glance up to the balcony. "Hey, Numbuh 3, get ready! This is gonna get pretty rocky here!"

"All set, Numbuh 4!" Numbuh 3 waved happily. "Hey, Numbuh 4, have you tried their chocolate?"

"Yeah, but I kinda prefer…" Numbuh 4 ducked suddenly. "Hey!" A wave of minty-fresh frozen yogurt swept over his head. "Numbuh 3, look out!"

The balcony was under a heavy barrage of chocolate chips. "Aaaaiiii!" Kuki ducked back, hands covering her head as they came shooting up through the thin metal floor.

"Numbuh 3!" Wally screamed.

"Almost there!" Numbuh 202 called. He picked the screwdriver from his teeth and began to fiddle with the wires.

Wally saw one of the soldiers stoop and pull something from his belt. He brought it up to his mouth and pulled on it with his teeth, then threw it at the balcony.

"Kuki!" Wally pointed desperately. "Get back!"

An explosion shook the room. Kuki, on the balcony, stumbled and fell. She grabbed at the shattered railing, clutched at the bent steel, lost her grip, slid and tumbled from her perch toward the floor below.

Wally didn't mean to jump forward. The floor simply flew under his feet. The troopers melted before him. Even his arms seemed to be moving of their own accord as they came out and strained forward to catch Kuki…

And then there was an explosion.

* * *

"What'd ya pull that cruddy diversion for anyway?" Numbuh 4 sat at the weapon's console of the SCAMPER, glowering at the display.

"The diversion was planned to startle the soldiers and take the heat off of you long enough for you to marshal a counterattack!" Numbuh 1 explained. "If you three had been all together, it might have worked, and we wouldn't have needed Numbuh 10 to pull us out of there!"

"Well, what was I supposed to do, for crud's sake?"

"You were _supposed_ to guard Numbuh 202!" Numbuh 1 glared down at him from the commanders seat. "If you had, we might not have a medical case on our hands here!"

"Yeh we would!" Numbuh 4 shot back. "We'd have Numbuh 3 with a broken neck instead of Numbuh 202 with a brain freeze." He glanced toward the stretcher. "Cruddy idiot, can't even handle a shot of Burpleberry. Numbuh 2 coulda stomached that…"

"That is not the problem." Numbuh 1 sighed. "The problem is, you were ordered to keep him covered while he disarmed the bomb."

"Well, he disarmed it, didn't he?"

"Barely, yes." Numbuh 1 raised an eyebrow. "If he'd been shot half a second earlier, we would have lost our central root system."

There was a momentary silence as everyone mulled over that a moment. Numbuh 205, a dark haired Mexican girl with large spectacles, looked over at Numbuh 3 anxiously. Numbuh 3 shrugged.

"Numbuh 4…" Numbuh 1 pushed up his sunglasses and rubbed his eyes. "Your action to save a teammate could have jeopardized the security of the entire Kids Next Door!"

"So what am I supposed to do?" Numbuh 4 repeated, arms crossed. "Babysit that cruddy dork and just let my friends get shot down?"

Numbuh 1 closed his eyes. "Numbuh 4, I know you and Numbuh 202 haven't gotten along so well, but you can't just protect the people you like! As Kids Next Door agents, sometimes we're called to forego our personal loyalties for the greater good!"

"Huh?"

"He means sometimes you have to fight for your boss and not for your buddies." Numbuh 205 explained.

"I knew that, ya cruddy girl!" Numbuh 4 cast a look back. "I just… I don't… Aw, fergit it." He glared at Numbuh 1. "This whole thing wouldn'ta been a problem if we'd had Numbuh 2 along."

Numbuh 205 looked down.

"Perhaps not." Numbuh 1 agreed. "But that doesn't mean… Attention on deck!"

The communicator had suddenly crackled into life. The operatives snapped to attention as the irate face of Numbuh 86 formed on the lit screen.

"Sector V, ye're ordered to Moon Base for an _immediate _debriefin' on the fracas at the Convention Center!" She scowled. "Numbuh 362 wants to talk to all of ye, and especially _you_, Numbuh 1!"

"Roger that, Numbuh 86, we'll be there!" Numbuh 1 saluted.

"Ye better be, you stoopid boy!" Numbuh 86 snarled at him. "End transmission!"

The screen turned black and Numbuh 1 hopped down from his chair. "Numbuh 3, set us a course for the moon base."

"Okey-dokey, Numbuh 1!" Numbuh 3 eagerly bounced over to the autopilot and began pressing buttons at random.

"We'd get there faster with a pilot." Numbuh 4 grumbled.

"Quiet." Numbuh 1 glanced over at him.

* * *

"I have already heard about Numbuh 4's actions and taken appropriate measures." Numbuh 362 nodded. "It rather confirms your report last week of internal tension in your team. These things do happen within teams. We try to avoid them and match people appropriately, but every so often there's a mistake." She walked over to the computer and picked up a file. "As it happens, Sector G is in need of a new 2x4 expert. We'll transfer Numbuh 202 and I'll assign someone else to take his place." 

"I appreciate it." Numbuh 1 nodded, sharply at attention. "Now, you wished to speak to me about something else, sir?"

"Yes." 362 set the file back down and glared at him. "I do. Come." She motioned to the door.

Numbuh 1 raised an eyebrow. "Sir..?"

"I've been stuck in this stuffy room all day." 362 tilted her head. "If I'm going to lose my lunch break raking you over the coals, I can at least take a walk while I'm doing it." She marched straight past him, toward the door. Numbuh 1 followed without comment.

They walked down the hall, past other operatives on their way to the mess hall. All saluted to 362, who replied with her own and walked on. Most of the staff seemed to be taking break, and the hallways slowly grew deserted.

"So what's this about?" Numbuh 1 sped up and came alongside 362, falling into step.

"At the Convention center, Global Command instructed Numbuh 10 to take her sector and secure the root area. Their technician was to defuse it while she and her squad secured the area." Numbuh 362 glanced over at Numbuh 1 sharply. "At this juncture, you broke into the transmission and instructed Numbuh 10 to secure the escape bay, adding that you would take your squad to the root core."

Numbuh 1 nodded. "My squad and I were in range and Numbuh 10 was in an excellent position to secure the escape route."

"Your squad was too far away and not properly prepared for such a task!" Numbuh 362 stopped and turned on him. "You countermanded a direct order from Global Command! Explain yourself!"

"Numbuh 10's team was not equipped with a suitable 2x4 expert!" Numbuh 1 folded his hands behind his back. "Numbuh 202 had shown himself remarkably capable, I thought it was the best decision."

"Oh please." Numbuh 362 crossed her arms, scowling. "We both know that had nothing to do with your decision. You love action, Numbuh 1, and you're a control freak to boot. You interfered because you couldn't bear to think of anyone else handling the problem." Numbuh 362 considered a moment. "Unless you were worried about Numbuh 10. She is your cousin, I suppose."

"My team has shown itself to be the most capable in defusing situations!" Numbuh 1 protested. "I had excellent reasons for acting as I did!"

"I'm sure you did, Nigel." 362 sighed. She shook her head and started to walk away, forcing Nigel to follow. "Everyone always has excellent reasons for what they think the best course, and everyone is convinced that any other course is disastrous. But that's not their decision to make."

They continued walking along the hallway. "When you join the Kids Next Door, Nigel, you swear an oath of loyalty to it, promising to obey the leadership and follow their orders. It's an essential part of the Kids Next Door, because when you join an organization, you can't always do what you think is best. You have to forego your personal wishes in order to be professional. Numbuh's 2 and 5 understand that, Numbuh 1. Why can't you?"

362 pushed open a door and walked out into an wide courtyard. "The entire point of a team, or an organization like the Kids Next Door, Nigel, is that we can work together on what the best leaders have decided is the proper course of action. That's why we take the oath. It's the responsibility of the soldiers to be concerned about the community, and not just themselves. That way, we can all work as a team." She paused and turned to him. "You know, we've talked about this before."

Nigel looked up. They had stopped directly under the golden statue of Numbuh Zero, a new addition to the moon base. He looked back down and smiled. "And you were right the last time we had it."

"So were you." Rachel admitted. "But not about this. I'm just saying it's a problem with you, Nigel. Your personal life is so close to your professional life, you often forget the distinction! You need to learn how to separate the two, and back down on your wishes when there's more at stake." Rachel looked at him. "You might even want to try working on your personal life, just so you can tell the difference."

Nigel nodded thoughtfully. "You have a point, sir."

"Glad to hear it." 362 inclined her head. "Now, I don't want to have this problem again."

They turned to walk back. At the exit to the courtyard, Nigel paused and turned to her. "There is one small thing, though. The oath you swear when you enter KND isn't just one the organization. It's also to a principle. You promise to battle adult tyranny without cause, without rest, and without fail."

Nigel indicated the hall with a sweep of his hand. "The organization is second to the principle, Rachel. Kids Next Door was created for the battle against adults, not the other way around. That's the ideal Numbuh Zero gave us, as well as scores of kids throughout history. If we are unfaithful to that, then we are unfaithful to what KND means."

Nigel passed through the door and left a thoughtful 362 on the other side.

* * *

"What'd you and that cruddy girl talk about so long, anyway?" Numbuh 4 looked up at Numbuh 1 as the SCAMPER made its way toward earth. 

Numbuh 1 shrugged. "Team business, Numbuh 4. Nothing terribly important. She's going to replace Numbuh 202, though."

"Bout time." 4 growled. "I can't stand that moron."

"You should learn about cooperation, Numbuh 4!" Numbuh 3 leaned upside-down over the back of her chair. "There's a Rainbow Monkey special on it this week!"

"Not again." 4 groaned, sinking his head in his hands. "Numbuh 1, is Numbuh 2 _evah_ comin' back?"

"Soon, I hope, Numbuh 4." Nigel nodded. "Now, prepare, for landing."

The SCAMPER hovered above the treehouse and slowly lowered itself through the roof. It gently touched down and the doors flew open. Out came the operatives.

"I'm askin' cause I just noticed the other day he's got some…" Numbuh 4 stopped still. "Whoah."

The Treehouse was a complete mess. Normally that was not so unusual, but this one clearly pointed to some kind of intrusion. The television was on, stuck on some Rainbow Monkey show. The refrigerator door gaped open, orange soda and candy bars spilling from inside. Various articles had been thrown around, and several doors bore blast marks on the locks.

Numbuh 1 sized up the situation with a look. "Kids Next Door, Battle Stations!"

The Numbuhs whipped out their weapons immediately. Numbuh 1 dashed over to the security grid control, followed by Numbuh 4. "I thought we turned on that cruddy system before we left!"

Numbuh 1 paused. "We did." He said, eying the lever. It was still on.

His fingers flew over the panels and flipped the switches. "Very strange." He frowned, tapping his chin. "The grid has no records of a break-in, apart from an attempt by Toilenator. Neither the adult nor the teenager alarm has been set off, yet both are still on."

He shook his head and turned to his team. "Whatever happened, we can figure it out later. Right now, we need to find out what they took. The system shows that there are no intruders in the treehouse, so Kids Next Door, spread out!"

The search took a few moments. Numbuh 205's and 202's rooms had not been disturbed at all. The candy stash had been slightly ravaged, but not badly. The teams coveted Samuarai helmet was still in its glass case, though there were some fingerprints 205 lifted off it. Numbuh 3 was missing a Rainbow Monkey (But that was nothing new), and Numbuh 4's room was a mess (Neither was that). Numbuh 1's room had been left clean and undisturbed.

The rooms that had been most clearly disturbed were Numbuh's 2 and 5's, though that might just have been because they had been cleaned more than the others. Numbuh 2's workshop had been searched thoroughly, and Numbuh 5's papers had been thrown in great disarray.

4 came walking up to 1, who was still working on the security grid. "We can't really find anything that's missing, Numbuh 1. Shall we call Moon Base?"

"I already did." Numbuh 1 nodded. "They said they'll send someone down." He eyed one screen thoughtfully. "I wonder… Every light in the base has been left on."

"What difference does that make?" Numbuh 4 shrugged. He bounced a yo-yo up and down in his hand. Nigel glanced over at it. "Found it in 2's room." Numbuh 4 explained. "Kinda fun. Wanna try?"

Nigel shook his head and turned back to the control. "It's just odd." He studied the panel. "Outside of myself, Global Command is the only place that has the remote access code to disarm the grid."

"Why would someone from Command do something like that?" Numbuh 4 frowned.

"A good question." Nigel nodded. "And something 362 said today… I think I will need to ask her a few questions about 2 and 5's 'vacation'."

* * *

362 stared out the window, watching the ships weave and dodge outside. She seemed to be rather thoughtful.

"Numbuh 60 reportin' for duty, sir!" The operative saluted, just behind her.

"At ease, Numbuh 60." She did not turn. "Report."

"Numbuh 86's team has cleared Sector V's treehouse without any disclosure." 60 remained at attention. "They have the maps Numbuh 5 requested and the tools Numbuh 2 asked for. Numbuh 86 and her party should arrive back at Moonbase at eleventy-hundred hours."

"Thank you, Numbuh 60." 362 nodded.

Numbuh 60 walked up next to her, and looked out the window. "Actually, they were away with tons of time to spare. You didn't need to keep Numbuh 1 here so long."

"He needed to be talked to." Rachel chewed her lip.

"Aw, he's okay." Patton observed. "I think you're too hard on him, sir."

"He's a loose cannon." Rachel shook her head. "You know, what really scares me is that the other sectors listened to him on that thing."

"Oh, come on." Patton glanced over. "The guy's one of the best field operatives we have! Of course they listened to him."

"He is quite capable." Rachel admitted. "I respect him, in a way."

"Uh-huh." Patton nodded. "But in a professional, or a personal way?"

* * *

A/N: If you relish what you read, than kindly REVIEW so I know to write more! I probably will anyway, but everything helps!

Whew. At last. Sorry this took so long, I left to go on a trip and after I came back I had work to do. But it was worth it. I think I like this chapter, even if the discussion about loyalties doesn't actually affect the story.

Anyway. I will try to update as much as I can, but I fear I may be busy in the coming weeks.


	9. Bitter Sweet

A/N: This story takes place before DOGHOUSE, GIRLFRIEND, CARAMEL, and any other ones released on YouTube but not in the US as of 6-30-07

* * *

"Bingo." Numbuh 5 whispered. "Just what Abby was lookin' for." She reached back into the crevice and took out the small box, blowing dust off the lid. "Ain't seen this in a long time."

She threw an anxious look back. Stickybeard and the others were still trying to blow the large engraven door leading to the tomb. Long John Stupid, Nough, and Latier were all rooting about by the statues where she had told them to look. No one was watching her just now.

Casting a final cautionary look around, Abby crouched over the box and opened it. A smile broke across her face.

Inside lay an old and moldy caramel, its days of sweetness long dead and gone. An iron ring was fixed in the top, and through that was tied a dirty leather cord.

Abby breathed a sigh of relief and quickly drew the cord over her head, tucking the caramel into the ragged folds of her tunic. A quick push hid the small box back in the crevice, and Abby carefully fitted the brick back into place before turning back to rejoin the pirates.

Stickybeard glowered at her as she came running up. "Yer sure that the Konfounded Caramel Crown of Kandacrunchalan be behind here? I be staking a lot on this one, lassie."

"Oh, yeah, Abby's sure." Numbuh 5 nodded vigorously. "She didn't have the manpower to do this last time she was here, but the map was very clear. Chief Kandacrunchalan hid his tings back there alright."

"Ye better be right, matey." Stickybeard cast an anxious glance to the north. "It's been a while since I tangled with the Marshmallow Mayans."

"Aw, relax, wouldja?." Abby glared at him, annoyed. "As long as we work through this stuff fast, they won't have no time to get down here, and even if they does, we got enough firepower to hold 'em back for a few seconds."

A sudden commotion distracted them, "We found it! We found it, missie!" Long John Stupid came running forward with a huge stone pillar in his hands. "It wuz buried in the bushes alongside the wall!"

Scratching his head in confusion, Stickybeard glanced over at Abby, who nodded complacently. "Good, John. Now stick it into the hole, an' just push hard to turn it."

"Yes'm" Long John Stupid shoved his way through the pirates crowding the door and heaved the pillar into the hole in it. The other pirates stepped back to watch as he carefully tested it to make sure it was secure, then threw his weight against it.

"Come on, guys, help him out here!" Abby dashed forward, pushing her back against the beam and digging her feet fruitlessly into the ground. "We're gonna need some muscle to move this here door!"

The pillar shuddered as pirates threw themselves against it. Nough and Latier crashed into it just next to her, and she saw the tall, lanky form of Bubbleosa bent double against it farther down the line. The beam seemed to bend back, then rebound, then remain stubbornly still. Six-and-forty able seaman and one scrawny little girl strained and heaved at an immobile stone pole sticking from an immobile rock door.

Abby heard a sudden pounding, and a huge heavy mass of leather and hair thudded into the pole next to her. Looking up, she found herself staring at the bushy red beard and eyebrows of Stickybeard himself. "Right lads, all together now, push!" He shouted.

Abby grinned and shoved her boots into the ground.

Whether the Captain gave them the final impetus to move, or whether from all the pirates pushing on his command, it would be hard to say, but Abby felt the pole grind forward a pace or two.

"Again!" Called the captain.

Boots dug in and shoulders strained.

Another grinding gain, and the wall was beginning to turn, opening a small crack.

"Once more!"

And the whole line of pirates heaved back and crashed against the beam.

A short grind, and then suddenly the pole was gone, and pirates, captain, and girl were sprawling on the grass, before a wide open door.

* * *

"No, but seriously, lassie, this be the best haul we had in many a-year." Stickybeard nodded confidently at Abby as the two walked along on the trail toward the beach. A candy crown dangled from Stickybeard's hat, and another from Abby's red bandanna. "Long has it been me dream to have one a' the Konfounded Krowns of King Kandacrunchalan."

"Yeah, well, Abby's just glad she could help out, is all." Abby cast a downward look to check on the tiny caramel bouncing on her necklace.

"Oh, this be help indeed, lassie!" Stickybeard cast a somewhat overenthusiastic arm over her shoulder. "The mates have been hungrin' for a good slice of candy piratin' for many a day now, and thanks to ye, now we have it!"

"Yeah, yeah." Abby shrugged off Sticky's arm and stood, hand on hip. "Well, you just keep it in mind next time I'm wantin' to go someplace, okay?"

Stickybeard laughed heartily and thumped her on the back. "Matey, tis' done! Just say the word and we'll be off!" He suddenly took a look up to the front and grimaced. "Now, if ye'll be excusin' me, I see me crew needs help with the distributin' of the goods."

Stickybeard stumped away, shouting. Sighing, Abby shook her head, and eased herself to a seat underneath a spreading palm tree. "Abby, what you gonna do about all this, girl?" She murmured.

"Excuse me, miss?"

Glancing up, her eyes met a sea of pink and blue, edged in lace. "Oh, hi John." She sighed. "Ya wanna sit down here?"

"Uh, yeah, thanks miss." John's ponderous weight heaved to the ground. "Uh, miss, I have a question fer ya…"

Abby froze. This could be bad. "Ye-e-ah…?"

"Uh…" John thumbed his nose, a trifle distracted as he hesitated. He bit down on his lip hard a moment, then suddenly burst out. "When is we gonna go after them Pearly Whites fer the captain?"

Oh. Abby let out the breath she'd been holding. Not so bad then. Still pretty difficult to answer though, since the blamed things didn't exist. "Preetty soon. Why ya askin?"

"Well, it's just that…" John looked around as if afraid someone might hear him. "The captain ain't getting' any younger, y'know, and the more candy he eats, the faster his teeth'll fall out…"

"Yeah." Abby nodded. "Abby knows. She's finding those Pearly Whites jest as quick as she can."

"Oh, goodie!" Long John clasped his hands together. "That's great news, miss. I was worried you'd stopped looking."

"Oh no. Not Abby." Abby laughed, but shook her head. Long John was despairingly easy to lie to. "She'll get the stuff for the Captain in plenty of time, don't you worry none." She cast a confused look at the big pirate. "Why you so worried about old Sticky anyway?"

John's small stupid eyes widened in alarm at the question. "Well… uh…. I… uh… he's the cap'n, isn't he?"

Abby snorted. "Yeah, but that ain't no explanation. It's not like you guys need to swear any kind a loyalty like we usedta in the KND, and even if you did, that don't mean you'd worry about him like this. Jest cause you obey somebody, don't mean you like them all the time." A grin spread across her face as she continued. "An' anyway, pirates don't even worry about obeying captains so much. They pretty much do whatever they blamed feel like."

Looking up, she saw John playing with his fingers, mumbling. "So what is it, John? You don't need to hang around him all the time like ya do, none of the others even pretend to care about the old sourball. Why do ya foller him around like a dog?"

She studied him curiously. John was staring at the ground, blinking rather oddly. His left hand pulled at the thick fingers of his right, and the broadcloth tie he wore moved up and down in a very strange manner.

When he finally chose to reply, it did not seem to properly answer her question.

"Ya know how I said that one time, how candy's the only thing that makes life happy sometimes? How it's so sweet it makes you forget how bitter life is? "

"Yeah." Abby nodded. "yeah, I member, John."

John pressed further. "Y—y—ya don't think I'm stupid fer thinking that, do ya?"

"No." Abby shook her head. "No, Abby doesn't so"

"Well, it's just that…" John stopped, shook his head, and gave up. "Ya see… When I wuz little, I had an older brudder, name of Jim. He was a nice enough brother when we was both little tykes. He'd take me down to the harbor and we'd sneak aboard to snatch some sugarplum. We slept together" John's eyes got a sort of brightness Abby had not noticed before. "I follered him everywhere."

John looked down again. "Later, though, when Jimmie got older, he got tired of all the old games we usedta play, and started to go off with some of his other friends. He tolld me to stop follering him everywhere. Sometimes he and his buddies would play tricks on me, and they'd all laugh." John blinked. "They weren't really very funny."

Abby stared at John.

"As time got on, " John continued. "Jim got to goin' out and staying late. When he'd come back, he'd walk all kinda funny and he'd smash stuff all over the place. Sometimes I'd try to get up and help him, but he'd usually just knock me down and keep stumbling to bed."

Large, potato-size drops trembled on the edge of John's eyes, but he kept on. "H—h--he didn't really mean to, ya know. He always said he was sorry in the morning, but then he'd go out and do the same thing all over again." John bit his lip. "But he was sorry. And he still looked after me, jest like he always usedta."

"Still, it was kinda hard." John brushed a sleeve across his face. "And I had to get used to it fast. I got big and strong, cause Jim wasn't working as much as he used to anymore, and sometimes I needed to work some. But I always gave Jim some, when he asked." John's eyebrows furrowed, troubled. "He never asked nicely, though. Never said _Please_, or _Thank ye_. Nuthing. But I knew he needed it." He looked over at Abby. "I know you don't know, miss, but ya gotta understand, its awful to have a brother like that."

Abby nodded. "I think I know what ya mean, John. It ain't easy."

"Well, one day." John bit down on his lip. "Jim went out to work at the docks. But he didn't come back. I checked all the candy bars in town—Snickers Saloon, Twist Tavern, Peanut-Butter Pub. Nothing. I asked Jim's friends, and they said he'd taken ship with some new cap'n, _so he could get away from that annoyin' punk_, they said." John frowned. "They was lying. Jim wouldn't never say that. So I went down to the dock, to wait for Jim."

He stopped and paused for breath. His chest heaved and he snuffled rather oddly.

"What happened, John?" Abby asked, anxiously.

"He was gonna come." John mumbled, but not to her. "He was gonna. I shoulda waited longer. But after three months, I got kinda lonely. I could unload ships and stuff, but I ran out of jobs, and it wasn't very nice, sleeping under the docks every night."

"And then…" John got a kinda wistful look. "One day, I wake up, and there's this red sticky candy cane sticking in my face. I wuz so hungry, I just grabbed and ate it all down before I realized it was a sword. And there's this big cap'n, saying he needs extra hands for his ship, and would I work for him. And then he sees what I did to his sword and he says, _laddie, ya must be starvin' fer a bit a candy. Take a burpleberrry sucker, why don't ye_. "

John smiled, a little. "So I went to work for the Cap'n. He let me have all the candy I wanted, and he always treated me fair and honorable-like. Sometimes he wuz a little rude, sure, but he always was a good cap'n, and he never turned on me."

John turned around to face Abby. "The cap'n was the one who took me in and helped me out, when I hadn't a friend in the world. D---d--do ya understand now why I foller him all the time?"

Abby nodded, slowly. "Yeah. I think I do, John."

"N—n—no you don't!" John wailed. "Y—y—you don't understand!" Big tears trickled down John's fat cheeks. "You can't understand what it is to lose a brother like that!"

"No, John," Abby shook her head. "I think Abby does. Abby understands…"

KABBOOOOM!

An explosion rocked the air, startling the two out of their talk. They glanced sharply to the beach to see smoke pouring from the side of the ship.

Stickybeard came panting up the path, waving his arms frantically. "Treason, mateys! We be under attack! Git to the ship, it's the Mayans, I know it is!"

"C--Come on, John!" Hauling herself from the world of pity she had sunk to, Abby jumped to her feet, snatching at her sword. "Let's git on down there!"

Still blubbering a little, John lumbered after the female fury as dark figures came boiling up from the water.

* * *

That night, Abby heard once again the familiar buzzing in her ear. She bit off the last of the Three Musketeers and pressed her ear to her head. "Yeah?"

"Hey Numbuh 5, its Numbuh 2 here."

"Oh. Yeah." Abby picked the case of tootsie rolls out of her hammock and tossed it to the floor, ignoring the startled grunt from below. "Hi, Hoagie." It occurred to her that Hoagie must be waking up very early to send her evening calls.

"Hi." There was a slight pause of static. Abby unwrapped a tiny piece of chocolate and stuffed it in her mouth. Again the radio crackled. "So… What've you been up to lately, Numbuh 5?"

"Oh, not much." Abby paused. "We got some more treasure today. Raided the Marshmallow Mayan pyramids to get it, but we got by okay. Them natives didn't try nothing. Whatchoo been up to?"

"Not much." She heard a slight hesitation. "I'm going to be working on some more experiments in the next couple days. Real advanced stuff. Beyond what I've even done at KND even."

"Gotten anywhere on that navy thing?"

"Uh…" Another little pause. "Kinda. I'm gonna be taking out some ships in… in… in about a couple weeks or so."

Ordinarily a reply like this would have aroused Abby's suspicions, but for some strange reason it didn't even register tonight. "Fine. Whatever works."

"Uh, yeah." Another small pause. Then: "Look, Numbuh 5, don't tell Numbuh 86, but actually I'm leaving today with Amerigo to test some new Airship thingie I designed. We've got the whole Armada with us today and everything, so you could attack, but I really, really, want to test this thing so do you think you could wait until after cause I'd really like to get it done and it'd be a big help to the KidsNextDoorand…"

"Sure." Abby sighed.

"Oh!" A slight pause. "Well… great! Thanks, Numbuh 5! You're the greatest!"

"Whatever." Abby sighed. "Anything else you got to say, Numbuh 2?"

"Ummmm…." She heard Hoagie think. "No. Not really, I guesss.

"Okay. Things is going great here too. Goodbye."

She pressed the radio off with a small click, then sat up on her bunk and rubbed her eyes. She cast a look down to her hammock and grabbed a handful of gumdrops before cramming them all in her mouth

"Hey, Bubbleosa." She called, in an undertone, to a dark form just climbing into his hammock. "How's Long John?"

The darkness raised up a sleepy head. "E's okay, missus. He took a pretty bad hit from that one fella, but it takes a bit to knock down old John."

Abby smiled. "That's good to hear. He went down pretty quick."

The darkness nodded. "Yeah. I think it was kinda a strain for him to jump like that, though. He ain't used to it. Good thing the shot didn't hit you. That shot woulda knocked you flat."

"Sure woulda." Abby nodded. "It's a good thing John jumped like that."

"By the way." The darkness lowered itself down to the bunk. "That lubber in the brig downstairs keeps asking fer ya."

"That guy?!" Abby sat up somewhat straighter. "Why, what'd he say?"

"Aw, nothing much." The darkness shifted on the hammock, getting comfortable. "Just to say he wants to talk to ya. Says it was an accident and all. Says to tell ya his name's Numbuh 20,000." The dark form grunted, its voice already drifting into sleepiness. "What a name. Anyway, he wants to talk. Oh, and he wants a phonecall."

The darkness subsided into snoring, as Abby slowly and deliberately bent back down to her bunk, careful not to upset the many candy bars, suckers, gummi worms, and sugarplums littering her bunk.

Numbuh 20,000. So she had seen correctly.

It had all been so fast. Explosions had been going off everywhere, and the water seemed alive with those dark, rubber-clad monsters. Swords had been flashing and guns going off, she hadn't even known what she was doing when she grabbed the leader and smashed him against the ship like that.

But that was no excuse. Abby was a seasoned operative of the KND and had been in more battle situations than she could count. She should've been on top of the situation from the first. Even if 20,000 had shot at her, that was no reason to attack him like that.

But how dare they attack her, attack **her**! Sure, she had missed a few call-ins with central command in the past week or so, but she had everything under control, and there was no reason to send those butchers in to blow up the ship on some supposed** rescue**. She had every right to react like that!

Still, Abby felt her hands tremble as she lay down on her hammock. She wondered if 2 would call back. After all, she had ended the call rather abruptly, and he might wonder if the transmission had been broken off. But she doubted it. He had sounded rather distracted when he called, and certainly not very interested in what she was doing.

She let her head fall onto her pillow. In the dark, she could see a red light blinking on her KND wristwatch. She should call up Numbuh 86 now, she knew, with Numbuh 2's report and an explanation of the attack.

Abby looked at her watch, at the dark form, at the candy all over her bed.

She could always call tomorrow, she decided.

* * *

Arrgh! What a lot of writing. Sorry for all of you who read this, but thanks for slogging to the end. Now that you have…

READ & REVIEW!!!

Anyway. Not much to say about this one. Hope everyone likes the stuff on Long John Stupid, it kinda came outa nowhere. Like I said at the beginning, this is before all the second half of this last season. I thought up the story before I saw them, and now there have been changes that affect my story. So I'm gonna say this takes place sometime between PARTY and PLANET. I think. I have no idea, but I know it comes before GIRLFRIEND (Which I haven't seen) and after SPINACH (duh) So we'll say it's an insert, and unfortunately that also means that probably very little will drastically change.

Has anyone else heard about CN's plans to cancel KND? Is there some kind of petition we can get together?

Next time: Hoagie's experiments in the Spanish Sea.


	10. Breaking Point

The salt breeze stung at Hoagie's cheeks, but he did not turn from it, gazing out to sea with a strange rapture. Though he had often been aboard boats, he had never been out upon the sea itself, and he found the experience as fascinating as it was new. The hot sun beat down from a cloudless sky and glinted off the azure sea with blinding brilliance, and far below he could just catch a hint of fish leaping from the waves.

"It is truly a sight to behold, yes?"

Hoagie started from his reverie and turned to the captain, bowing. "Yes, indeed, Brother Vespinachuci, and I must once again thank you for your kind attentions while I have been among your men.

"It is nothing." The pompous nobleman twirled his mustaches. "Always, we are proud to serve the Spinach. Even if…" and he paused. "Even if we must so serve an old enemy, eh, brother Hoagie?"

Chuckling nervously, Hoagie rubbed the back of his head. "Oh, brother Vespinachuci, you shame me by the memory of youthful errors." He swept low in an elegant bow. "I beg your pardon for my rash error in the days of my foolishness."

"Is nothing." Vespinachuci nodded. "We are all men, yes? We all make mistakes, you see? We stumble, we fall, but we come up again and march on. It is the soldier's duty to face the errors and confront them. Ah, but we are pleased to help you."

"Oh, no, brother Vespinachuci, the pleasure is all mine." Hoagie turned to the railing again, staring across the sea. "It is my honor to sail with you and the honored Spinach Armada again."

On every side of the mighty flagship sailed masted giants of ships, cannons sprouting from every porthole, long green sails spread to the afternoon breeze of the Spinach Sea. Tiny schooners darted to and fro beneath their strong timbers, dashing about gaily. Some were sleek, some were strong, some were swift, all were splendid. Yet Hoagie's gaze was fastened on a small, rather plain-looking ship stripped of its sails and covered in strange canvas wrappings. It was towed behind a large clipper in full sail.

"We will reach the Spinach Sea by this afternoon." Said Vespinachuci, following his gaze. "The water will be smooth enough there for your needs."

* * *

The bright morning sun had risen from one side of the ship, passed overhead, and settled again on the other side by the time they reached the sea.

Hoagie blinked in surprise. The Spinach Sea looked like a lake in the middle of the ocean. The surface was smooth and calm, as Vespinachuci had promised, yet it came right up, water upon water, against the turbulent waves of the ocean. The sunlight glinted against the glasslike surface and went on to glance off the rolling breakers.

Vespinachuci chuckled at his consternation. "It is indeed most peculiar. Our finest mariners cannot understand it, but perhaps, with you men of learning, it is different, yes?"

Hoagie shook his head. "Maybe something with the ocean currents or something, but wowsa! When was this discovered?"

"Many years ago." Vespinachuci explained. "In the early years, the sailors were afraid of being entangled in the mats of spinach in the Sea, and steered clear of it. Whoever was the first, we do not know."

"They should not have feared the Spinach." Both Hoagie and the captain turned at the dry voice. Baruchli Spinachoza came walking up the long deck to them. "Had they faced the danger and ventured into the sea, perhaps we would have been saved many years of terror"

"Father Spinachoza!" Vespinachuci bowed low. Hoagie noticed his face had turned a little green. "I—I—I h—had no idea that you had recovered from your seasickness so soon!"

"I have not." Spinachoza closed his eyes. "But that does not lessen the need for action." He turned to Hoagie. "I am very anxious to see our brother's handiwork. Should you not prepare your vessel, Brother Hoagie?"

"Y—yes." Hoagie bowed. "However, we have only just arrived. The boats have not yet been launched."

"I shall get it ready for you at once." Vespinachuci bowed and moved off in great haste.

Spinachoza looked after him thoughtfully, then glanced back at Hoagie. "Well, brother." He said. "Do you feel any anxiety about these upcoming tests?"

"Not at all." Hoagie looked eagerly over the side. "I wanna see how this thing works out. The ocean looks very smooth, it should make things much easier."

Baruchli Spinachoza came over to the railing, wincing at the sight of the sea below. "You know, if your endeavors are successful, Brother Hoagie, it will open up whole new avenues for the Spinach Armada. We shall be able to spread the news of Spinach in ways never seen before."

"Heh." Hoagie rubbed the back of his head. "Won't that be great. Um, I think I'll go see how Vespinachuci is doing on the whole thing with the boats."

* * *

Hoagie bent low over the prow of the rowboat and scooped up a bit of the spinach in a small glass bottle. He sniffed it experimentally, then nodded and corked the bottle decisively.

Vespinachuci, who had come in the boat with him, eyed him curiously. "Ah, but what do you want that for, my friend?"

Hoagie looked up. "Nothing important. Just a little side thing I've got going." He stuffed the bottle into the sleeve of his cloak. "Say, Vespinachuci, I've got a question."

"I shall answer, if I can." Vespinachuci nodded. "What is it, holy man?"

"Uh, right." Hoagie coughed. People had been calling him that the whole trip long, and he still hadn't gotten used to it. "Why do you still serve Spinachia, if ya hate the stuff?"

"_Por Dios_!" Vespinachuci started to his feet, nearly upsetting the boat. "_Que es_… What do you mean, boy, to make such an accusation of me? I love the Spinach! I have-a served it my whole life!"

Hoagie stared at him. "Okay, okay. Jeez." He sighed as the captain eased to his seat again. "Okay, well, can I ask another question?"

Vespinachuci eyed him. "If you continue to be blasphemous, then no."

"Nothing like that." Hoagie rolled his eyes. "Captain, did you make a mistake? Like, a really bad mistake? Or, you know, just find yourself in a really, really tough spot, and want to just kinda forget about all of it? Like, say you decided to take a voyage, only after you left, you found it was a lot more difficult than what you thought?"

Vespinachuci relaxed, nodding. "_Si_, many times."

Hoagie, encouraged, continued. "What did you do about it?"

The captain thought a moment. "That is always difficult." He considered. "As captain, though, I have no choice. I am responsible for many men, and I cannot simply ignore it. Also, in order to be fair to my men, I cannot pretend the mistakes are anyone's but my own. So it is necessary for me to face the problem that I have myself created and work to correct it." He looked over at Hoagie. "Then I learn from it, and seek to keep it from happening again. You understand me, yes?"

"Kinda." Hoagie frowned. "But what about when you weren't a captain?"

Vespinachuci shrugged. "Much the same thing, my friend. I had to take care of my mother and little brothers then, so the considerations were exactly the same."

"You had to watch over your family?" Hoagie glanced at him, surprised.

"Oh, si." Vespinachuci gave a little smile. "My father, he die when I was very young. Windstorm that hit Armada while we trying to invade Broccolitian" He looked down. "Always I want to follow my father, to the sea."

Hoagie stared. "You… um… your father… He… you… windstorm.." He coughed awkwardly. "Hey, that's too bad."

"Oh, is no bad." Vespinachuci waved the commiseration away. "It teach me… _que es la palabra_… responsibility? to face problems. I learn not to hide from mistakes I make, but try to face them and correct them." He gestured to the huge vessel as they approached. "That is what you learned men do with experiments, no?"

"Uh… well yeah." Hoagie watched Vespinachuci climb up the rope ladder swinging from the ship's side. "I guess we do."

* * *

"The one thing I no comprehend, brother Hoagie, is why you need all these… these… What is word for these again?"

Hoagie adjusted a small wooden wheel. "They're called Hamsters, Captain Vespinachuci." He took a peek inside at the chubby rodent and waved at it cheerily. "I used to use them _all_ the time for things like this." He explained, turning to the captain with the same cheeky smile. "The hamsters run in the wheels and make all the little thingies above work."

"Surely, though," Vespinachuci frowned, scanning the thousands of wheels filling the lower deck. "They will get hungry."

"Uh-uh!" Hoagie indicated a little water bottle attached to the wheel, and the automated food dispenser. "I've got that all taken care of. They should get enough stuff to keep running for plenty of time." He cocked an exaggerated eyebrow at Vespinachuci. "C'mon, trust me. I've done this stuff hundreds of times before."

The captain shrugged as if agreeing. "Are we prepared to leave, then, _mi ami_?"

"Hang on one sec." Hoagie fiddled around with some odd shaped controls and set an alarm clock near the wheels. Vespinachuci eyed it, puzzled. "The hamsters are trained to start when they hear it." Hoagie explained. He turned to the stair. "Now let's go."

* * *

"You appear to have a great deal of confidence in your invention." Father Spinachoza turned to the short monk and the bearded captain who stood at the railing with him. "The rest of the fleet has removed to a distance of a least five more leaves. They fear it will explode"

"Yeah, right." Hoagie snorted. "The worst that thing could do is crash back to the ocean, and maybe make a big wave or something."

"He speaks truly, holy father." Amerigo Vespinachuci hastened to assure the tall, thin monk. "I have seen the ship, and there is nothing strange or unholy within it's walls."

"I know, captain." Spinachoza took a small handkerchief from his pocket and spat into it. "I have faith in Brother Hoagie's talents, or else I would not have asked him to attempt this in the first place."

Hoagie grinned, then took the bottle from his sleeve and sniffed it again. After a moment's thought, he spat into it and swirled it around a bit before tasting a bit of the mixture. He grimaced and poured it out.

Looking up, he saw the cold green stare of Father Spinachoza. "And what is that, brother?"

Hoagie shrugged and stuffed the empty bottle back into his sleeve. "Nothing big. Little thing I'm playing around with."

"You try too many projects at once" Spinachoza turned back to the railing. "You lack focus, brother."

"Uh-huh." Hoagie nodded absentmindedly, licking the tips of his fingers.

The thin priest sighed. "How much longer before your hamsters start their work, brother Hoagie?"

Hoagie glanced up sharply, then pulled back his sleeve to look at his watch. "About five more minutes."

"Wonderful." Spinachoza's voice exposed his impatience.

"I will go and give some commands about the correction of our course a quick moment." Vespinachuci bowed and hurried off.

The monk and priest remained standing at the rail, each lost in their own thoughts. Hoagie started to say something then stopped thought, and returned to his study of the waves. A moment later he nearly said it again, but caught himself in time and almost dragged himself back to the railing.

After about five times of this back-and-forth play, Hoagie finally gave up.

"Holy Father." He said, ignoring the wince on Spinachoza's face. "May I ask you a question?"

"You have already." Spinachoza did not turn. "But continue, ask another."

"Have you ever… you know… been in a tough spot?" Hoagie looked up at him anxiously. "Where you needed to decide who your friends were?"

"No." Baruchli Spinachoza continued to stare impassively out at the sea.

"Never?" Hoagie stumbled backward in surprise. "But haven't you ever wondered? Because sometimes your enemies can turn out to be pretty cool guys, and you kinda wish they could get along with your old friends…."

"No." Spinachoza still did not turn. "I have never had to decide, because for me, all friendships are superseded by one love."

"Oh? And what was that?" Hoagie studied him thoughtfully.

"My love for the Spinach." Father Spinachoza turned to gravely regard him. "For me, all earthly bindings are as nothing before the greatness of Spinach. All my loyalties are second to my devotion to the blessed green leaf."

"But don't you ever…"

Hoagie was interrupted by a loud roar. Whirling around, he gave a sharp intake of breath. Baruchli Spinachoza raised his eyebrows and nodded amiably. Captain Vespinachuci came running up, exclamations pouring from his lips.

The small schooner, stripped of its canvas wrappings, was sprouting thousands of whirling propellers and slowly, shakily, it was rising above the teaming surface of the sea. Water trickled down its barnacle-encrusted timbers and fell from the keel to the sea below.

"A flying warship." Baruchli Spinachoza breathed in satisfaction. "A vessel capable of leaving the seaside, of reaching our enemies wherever they hide. This weapon shall stretch the word of Spinach from East to West."

Again he patted Hoagie on the back. "You have done the Spinach a great service, Brother Hoagie."

Hoagie coughed, a little awkwardly, and rubbed the back of his neck. "Uh, heh-heh. Yeah."

* * *

"I see. Thank you, Mrs. Lincoln. Yes, don't worry about it. I just wanted to know if you were aware of the situation." 

Nigel set down the phone thoughtfully. For a moment he stood there, strumming his fingers against the receiver.

Numbuh Four stood in the entryway, glaring at him. "Just got back from Numbuh Two's. His Mom said she thought he was on somethin' with us or something."

"And Tommy?" Numbuh One arched an eyebrow.

"Same cruddy stuff about 'working alone.' But he did ask when Hoagie was coming back." Numbuh Four growled. "Said Numbuh 86 was all up in his room. That cruddy girl rooted through all his junk."

Numbuh One nodded. "Mrs. Lincoln said she thought Abby was on some trip with us, and she said Cree's been gone for days." He took off his glasses and rubbed them. "If we're planning an attack on the teenagers, we're sure keeping bad tabs on them."

Numbuh Three came bouncing into the control room, nearly knocking over Numbuh Four. "Numbuh Five's maps are all missing from her room, and she took her special candy stash too! And the resort people say they haven't seen either of them anywhere!" She put on a sad-puppy dog face. "I hope she has my Rainbow Monkey Friends necklace! Otherwise she might be lonely."

Numbuh One sighed. "I should never have let them leave in the first place." He muttered. "I should have insisted on knowing what my team was doing."

"Huh? Hang on a sec, Numbuh One." Numbuh Four scratched his head, puzzled. "You saying this whole thing was planned? Like from the beginning?"

"Of course it was." Nigel shot Wally an annoyed glance. "Numbuh 362 herself authorized their 'vacation.' Global Command has been directing things for a long while now."

"You mean you knew, Numbuh One?" Numbuh Three put her head on one side. "But why didn't you say anything?"

"Never mind that crud." Numbuh Four waved the question aside. "What'd we do now?"

Numbuh One sighed and fitted his glasses to his face. "I've remained silent for too long. I think our Soopreme Leader has some questions to answer."

* * *

Hoagie, completely ignorant of the fuss he was causing his friends, spent the night in celebration of his experiment. As a matter of fact, he spent so much time, he completely forgot to wake up and call Numbuh Five about it.

* * *

**A/N: REVIEW!**

Okay, if you've read this far, then just drop a note into the review thing to let me know you did! It will only take a moment! Since you have read, please review! Give me your ideas, your praise, your criticisms, your flames, your huddled ideas yearning to breathe free…!

Anyway. Please Review. Many thanks to all those who have in the past, this chapter would never have gotten here if it hadn't been for you.

On a technical note here, the Spinach Sea is not completely fictional. It is a reference to the Sargasso Sea, a still portion of water found in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. It is actually rather devoid of life, except for an unusual amount of seaweed.

I have a pretty good idea of where I'm going now, and I'll try to wrap this up as soon as I can.

Next Chapter: Numbuh 1 confronts Numbuh 362, and he wants some answers!


	11. Dividing Line

New Cadets just out of graduation ceremonies were told that the Kids Next Door Moon Base was a quiet, orderly installation. The gears were well-oiled, the commands controlled, the officers courteous, and everything as smooth as could be arranged.

It didn't usually take the cadets long to learn that it was all a lie. Kids Next Door Moon Base, as the central control of the KND organization, was just as disruptive as any two-bit installation, and maybe a fight or two more. Stolen Ice cream, snotty noses, untied shoes, and loud arguments were just a few of the things one might have to deal with.

Currently, one of these arguments was taking place in the main bridge, right on the central pavilion of The Soopreme Command, and the Soopreme Leader was listening to it with her head in her hands, hoping against hope everything would all just go away.

"She doesn't have to tell him anything!" That was Numbuh 65.3. "Line 48.7 of the Kids Next Door employment contract clearly states that operatives may be taken from their sector and employed to the general benefit of the Kids Next Door without their sector leader's approval or knowledge!"

"Aw, shut up." Numbuh 60. He always had hated the regulations. "That doesn't make any kind of difference, but the man has a right to know what's going on in his sector!"

"Ya mean to say you'd entrust vital KND operation plans to a boy!?" Numbuh 86, obviously.

"A little late." 60 shot back. "We already entrusted them to Numbuh 2 and 20,000!"

"Yeah, and look where they are now!" Fanny screamed back. "I say we should take a quick bombing run with the MOSQUITTO's and just cut our losses! We shoulda never had boys involved with this in the first place!"

"Look." She heard 60 take a step toward 86. "I've had it up to here with you and your stupid boy complex…"

"STOP!" 362 lifted her head from her arms, startling the argument into silence. Operatives 60, 65.3, and 86 paused, turning to look at her.

"This whole thing is getting us nowhere." 362 sighed and let her head fall back into her palm. "86, have we received anything new in the past five minutes?"

Flustered, 86 turned to a control panel and fiddled with the screen a moment before turning back to face her weary commander. "No, sir. But Security says Numbuh 1 has landed and is on his way up here."

"Fine." 362 groaned. "Just great. Okay, all three of you clear out. The support technicians too. I want everyone OUT of this room ASA-NOW!"

"But sir, regulations…"

"OUT!" 362 half-started from her chair, making 65.3 jump back and scramble for the exit. 60 shot him an amused grin and nodded reassuringly at the Soopreme Leader as he left, followed by the support technicians, who were all but clueless as to the entire fracas. The guards filed out, pushing two wayward operatives who had somehow decided to play Frisbee on the command deck.

The last to leave, Numbuh 86, turned at the door. "Sir, if you need me for anything,or if that boy causes any problems…"

"Just…" 362's head was sunk deep in her hand. "don't worry about it, Fanny."

"Allright." Fanny eyed her commander worridley. "As long as you're sure you want to…"

A short laugh burst from the huddled orange shirt. "I didn't _want_ to do any of this, Fanny." She looked up at the Global Tactician. "But since when did that matter in this job?"

Fanny stared at her.

"Go." Rachel pointed. "Please. I'll call you guys back in when I'm ready."

She let her head fall back into the soft folds of her sweatshirt, not looking up as she heard the door slam shut. In her mind, she tried to run over what she would say, but her thoughts would not focus, running over hill and under dale and round in circles. She tried to marshal them, concentrate on one problem and develop logically from there. It was a useful skill she had often had need of as Leader. But the problems wouldn't stay still, they weaved and dodged and seemed to multiply.

Spinach, yes, they could start with spinach… Or maybe candy pirates. No, start with Spinach, it would put him on the defensive, and then she could… but that wasn't right. He deserved more than that. He deserved… Oh shoot, he deserved 86's command post, if you wanted to get picky. He probably deserved **her **command post. It's not like she had done such a great job on keeping it. She didn't do a great job on most things. Take this one, for example. It had been her idea to start this whole operation in the first place, and now look where it was. Her own cabinet couldn't…

Her eyes flew open. The clear, distinct tap of sneakers on hard metal could be heard in the hallway.

He was almost here. She'd better get ready. Suddenly noticing a throbbing sensation on the sides of her head, 362 realized she was pulling on her hair. She let go and smoothed it back, straightening up in the chair and turning to face the window outside. No more time to think now. Better just take a few deep breaths, just to calm yourself. It was an old trick she had learned from her father.

A fine time for it to suddenly stop working.

There was a small whoosh of air as the door slid open. The sneakers paused at the entrance, apparently confused by the room's emptiness. 362 allowed herself a small grin as she thought about that. Slowly, cautiously, they squeaked over the gap, and the door whooshed shut. The tapping resumed, quietly and curiously at first, and then quickly and more bold.

The deep breaths weren't working, and 362 didn't think they were going to. With a resigned sigh, she closed her eyes and turned the chair around to face Numbuh One.

He was just on the first tier of console computers, about twenty feet from the entrance, and was peering about in a most perplexed manner. As she turned around, he had whirled to face the noise, and half-drawn something from his boot.

The sight almost made her smile. The kid had some serious paranoia issues. Clearing her throat, she spoke.

"Numbuh 1. Good to see you on Moon Base again."

"Miss Soopreme Leader." His hand withdrew from his sock. "Sir."

She gave her head a small lift. "The others are off on lunch break."

A lie. Obviously. It was 4:00 in the afternoon. But Numbuh 1 did not comment, but simply straightened up in a salute. "Reporting for duty, sir. I have some inquiries to make regarding some operations underway at Global Command."

Clever. He wasn't asking about Numbuh's 5 and 2, just about 'some operations.' "Numbuh 86 is out right now." She replied. "But I think I might be able to help you with that."

"Yes, sir, I know." He moved up to the second tier of computers. "In fact, I came here expressly to ask you about these operations, because I think you know about them just as much as Numbuh 86."

She watched him slowly pace up the stairs. "Well, yes, that is my prerogative. Is there something going on I should know about?"

"Not exactly." Nigel paused for a moment to find the right word. "More… something I need a bit more data on. Just a simple information clarification."

"Intel usually handles…" She started, and then suddenly stopped and sighed. "Oh, what's the use. You're here about Hoagie and Abby, aren't you?"

There was a slight pause before his answer. "Yes. I am." He sounded surprised.

With a groan, Rachel slumped forward in her chair.

"How did you know, anyway?" Nigel walked up the last couple tiers and started up the stairs.

Rachel shrugged wearily. "Not too hard. We have people watching the Lincoln's and the Gilligans', and we knew you didn't report that one break-in at your base…"

"Then it was you." Nigel raised his eyebrows. "I thought so."

Rachel gave a curt nod.

"Well." Nigel gave his sunglasses a little push up his nose. "Could you kindly tell me why my base was broken into and where my two best operatives are? After all, as their leader, I do have some right to know."

Groaning, Rachel slipped down from her high command chair. "Nigel, you have to understand something." She said, walking towards him. "As global commander, you're not always free to do exactly as you want."

Rachel wasn't sure whether to walk right up to Nigel or pace back and forth on the platform, so it was something of a relief when he deferentially moved out of her way so she could descend the stairs.

"There are things you have to consider. Rules, traditions, tactics, the safety and security of kids at large… all of them have to come into play when decisions are made." Rachel stepped off the bottom and waited for Nigel to join her. "Simply being a leader means that you can't do whatever you like."

"I know." Nigel nodded. "Being a leader myself, I am familiar with the demands and responsibilities. But this doesn't exactly answer my question."

Sighing, Rachel turned from him and began to walk back down the computer tiers. "Okay, this is the shorthand account." She stopped at a sizeable computer, one that 65.3 generally used, and pressed a few buttons. Images sprouted on the screen as Nigel came up to look. "The attack on the artic base was orchestrated by Stickybeard and the Spinach Armada. Your two operatives were sent in to investigate the threat and neutralize it, preferably by pitting them against each other."

"Why not a simple tactical strike?" Nigel interrupted, frowning at the images of brussel sprouts and bubblegum.

"Are you kidding?" Rachel gestured. "Look at their weaponry! We'd be lucky to last five minutes against that!"

Nigel shrugged. "We've faced off against worse."

"By necessity, not design. It's not something we'd like to do again." Rachel returned to the screen. "Anyway, as you can see from the progressing reports, things proceeded rather well, if a bit slower than we expected."

"Building trust with one's enemies is not exactly easy." Nigel nodded.

"Granted." Rachel inclined her head. "Numbuh 5 managed to penetrate the pirates rather easily, while Numbuh 2 took significantly longer. However, we were learning a lot, and we had no better ideas, so we kept on."

"I see the raid on the treehouse was done to get some supplies they requested." Nigel pointed. "That was the day of the convention center raid?"

Rachel bit her lip. "Yes. It was."

"The day you called me to the moon base for debriefing?"

"A distraction, yes." Rachel looked up from the screen and stared the boy right in the face. "This is what I was telling you about, Nigel. It's not as if anyone here _wanted_ to trick you, but we had to get those maps somehow." A quick glance down for a moment, and then her gaze was back. "You have to know that we had no choice except to lie to you."

"You could have asked us for them." The blue glow of the screen glimmered off the British operative's glasses.

"Yes." Rachel inclined her head. "But you would have suspected something."

Nigel shrugged. "I did anyway."

"You did?" Rachel blinked at him.

"Oh yes." Nigel looked at her. "Numbuh 86 is a _very_ poor stealth operative. She left a great many signs of her breakin, and yet left no register on the security grid." A small smile twisted his lips. "Numbuh 3 wants her Power Princess Rainbow Monkey back, by the way."

"Power Prin…?" Rachel stared at him. "You're not saying that she…?" Smiling herself, she shook her head. "I'll have to talk to Fanny about that." _Privately_. She thought. 86 was not anxious for her secret passion to be known.

"There was also something else."

She snapped her head back up. Nigel was talking again.

"In the debriefing, you had mentioned how Numbuh's 2 and 5 understood sacrifice. You wouldn't have mentioned them, especially while they were on vacation, unless, well, they weren't." Nigel shrugged. "It struck me as a trifle odd, and with the security problem and some other things I'd noticed, it wasn't too hard to guess what was going on."

Rachel stared at him.

He grinned. "Numbuh 2 lends me some of his mystery stories from time to time."

Strangely annoyed, she blinked and looked away. "Well, I didn't really think you would stay fooled for long. Actually, I thought I'd have to deal with it sooner." With a shake of her head, she looked back at him. "But if you did know, why didn't you say anything?"

"I'm quite capable of understanding a need for secrecy. I decided if you needed me to know, you would tell me." Nigel looked down. "I kinda hoped you would tell me of your own free will, instead of me having to barge in like this."

There was a little pause, and just a slight catch in Rachel's voice as she asked, "Then why did you?"

"The raid on our base, and Numbuh 86's sudden request for their profiles two days ago." His right eyebrow lowered rather ominously. "Such drastic actions convinced me that something had gone wrong, that Global Command had made a bad mistake somewhere."

A short silence filled the room. Rachel chewed on her lip, and Nigel waited, watching her. "I'm right, aren't I?" He finally asked, after it became obvious she didn't want to reply.

With a sudden violent motion, Rachel shoved away from him, and almost ran down the tiers to the deck below.

"Hang on!" Nigel hopped down after her. "Wait a moment!"

He slowed as he reached the deck, carefully stepping onto the metal floor. Some twenty feet away, Rachel stood facing the cold hard glass of the observation window. Her back was turned to Nigel, and he could just barely catch the reflection of her face, but something warned him to approach slowly.

"Rachel…" He started.

"Stop." Her voice arrested him.

He waited for her shoulders to stop heaving, and said nothing as she turned to face him, eyes glimmering but defiantly tearless.

"You're right." She answered steadily. "As of one week ago, we lost touch with both of your operatives. They had missed a few check-in calls, and a team sent to check on Numbuh 5, the central link, has now disappeared without explanation. We have also sent a few men to establish link with Numbuh 2, but they have reported they can find no trace of him anywhere." She blinked a few times and looked down, but kept right on. "Repeated calls to 5 have had no effect, and 2 has been lost to our scanners."

Numbuh 1 closed his eyes.

"Currently we are awaiting further word while our command tries to figure out what to do." Numbuh 362 swallowed what dignity she had left. "But for the moment, you're right. I've made a bad mess of things."

Numbuh 1's eyebrows shot up. "I never said…"

"No. But nonetheless it is the case." 362's gaze still did not waver. "The entire operation was under my control and supervision, and as such, its failure is wholly and entirely my fault."

"But surely…"

"Nigel." Again she stopped him. "You just said you're a leader. Whose fault is it if something goes wrong in your team?"

Nigel stopped in mid-response. He lowered his head and the glasses slipped down his nose. "Mine."

"Exactly." A nod and a forced swallow. "As head of Global Command I should have foreseen the problem and taken care of it, or consulted you at the first side of trouble. I'm sorry for the problem with your teammates, Numbuh 1, and I'm sorry I had to lie to you."

Sensing the awkwardness of the situation, Nigel glanced down. "Well… correct me if I'm wrong, but weren't most of the things you told me completely true?"

Her eyes widened.

"In a technical sense." He added.

Another nod, this one rather slower. "Yes. The things I told you were true, they just weren't the whole story."

"So then." Nigel looked up and smiled. "It isn't lying. Just deception."

"Yes." Rachel agreed. "Though that doesn't make me feel any better."

Again there was an awkward silence, until finally Nigel coughed. "Well," He said, saluting. "Now that I've cleared that up, I should be getting back to my sector. Sorry for taking up your time." He turned to leave.

"Nigel."

Again she stopped him with a word, and again he turned. "Yes?"

"If I know you, and I think I do." She frowned. "You're thinking about going after your teammates."

"I wouldn't dream of it." Nigel's glasses hid any movement of his eyes.

"Regardless." She stepped toward him. "Understand once and for all, this is a global command operation. Your sector is **not **to be involved in **any** way. Do not attempt a rescue, do not send any of your members, do not do anything with direct authorization." She glared at him. "Do you understand?"

Numbuh 1 nodded, slowly. "Completely, sir. You won't need to worry about a thing."

He saluted once more, and then without a word turned and left.

* * *

Numbuh 1 of the Kids Next Door shoved past Numbuh 60 on his way to the ships. With a few quick strides he ran up to the SCAMPER and jumped inside.

"Numbuh 3, set us a course for home." He snapped. "Quickly!"

"Okey dokey!" The bright girl bounded up to the computer and began pressing buttons almost at random. Numbuh 4, from his chair on the left, glowered at their commander.

"Heard every word from that BUG you was wearing." He snarled. "What's the cruddy idea? I thought we came here to tell that stupid girl that we're not going with her stupid plan to send off our stupid teammates on some stupid mission! What was all that crud you said in there about!?"

"I assume you're talking about Numbuh 86." Numbuh 1 cocked an icy eyebrow at the Austrailian. "As to my talk with Numbuh 362, we are doing exactly what I said."

"What!" Numbuh 4 nearly exploded up from the chair. "You mean we're not going to do _anything_?"

"That's not what I said." A small grin spread on the boy's face. "I said I understood what she wants, and I do. I said she won't have to worry, and I don't think she will."

The ship made a few beeping noises and began to shakily roar off the platform.

"And I said I wouldn't dream of attempting a rescue, and I won't." Numbuh 1 pushed his sunglasses up his nose. "I've already planned it all out."

Numbuh 4's face showed nothing but utter and complete bewilderment.

* * *

Please Comment! Please Review! Please FLAME me if you so wish! (Am I the only one who thinks Numbuh 1 is a little too perfect here?) Just let me know you read it!

So. Here we are. Things finally starting to move. I have some kinks worked out and I think the next couple chapters should go very well. Thanks to everyone who's stuck for so long. Actually the amount of reviews have been quite encouraging.

On a note of shameless self-promotion, I have a deviantArt account, and I recently put up a picture for the first chapter. I might put up more (**I** don't know), but if you're at all interested, look it up, it's called SEPARATION: 5 and 362/

Chapter: Abby and Stickybeard talk about the importance of friendships, while Abby's old friends plan a rescue.


	12. Coffee Break

"I love it when we breaks the rules!" Numbuh 4 hopped down from the stand, fingers twitching. "Good thing they never sent us any cruddy replacements, or there might be some problems."

"Yes, Numbuh 4." Numbuh 1 bent over the screen, rapidly typing.

"Got the things you wanted!" Numbuh 3 bounced in happily, carrying a stack of papers. She paused to glance at the screen and wrinkled her nose. "Hey, aren't those supposed to be **secret** files?"

"Yes, Numbuh 3." Numbuh 1 didn't even look up. "Now put the papers over there, please."

"I can't wait to pound that stupid candy pirate's face in!" Wally swung at the air enthusiastically. "I ain't had a chance to get him since that whole thing on the ship!" He paused and thought hard for a moment. "Or maybe the Halloween thing. When we gonna go there and kick his butt?"

"As soon as we find him." Numbuh 1 sighed in irritation. "Once we know where his butt is, then you can kick it all you like. But until then…"

"Su-Weeeeee-heeet!" Wally jumped up. "What time do we start?"

Numbuh 1 closed his eyes.

"Got the papers all ready, Numbuh 1!" Kuki bounced happily back. "Now how do we find Mr. Candy-Pirate's base?"

"Simple." Numbuh 1 tapped a few keys. "We look where he attacks. Now what's the most recent report about his movements?

"Um, lemme see." 3 dove into the stack, sending papers flying. "Nothing, nothing… oooh! Looky! He's heading to Vermont!"

"Numbuh 1, we better warn Sector V!" 4 turned to 1 with an alarmed expression.

"Numbuh 4…" Nigel ground his palm into his head. He gave it up and turned to Kuki. "Numbuh 3, that's probably the report from the first time we met him.

Squinting, Numbuh 3 studied the paper. "Oh yeah!" She looked up brightly. "Boy, that was a long time ago, huh, Numbuh 1?"

"Yes." Another sigh.

"Oh wait!" 3 jumped into the pile and popped back out, paper in hand. "Here's something about his ship heading for the StarBucks Sea!" She squinted at it. "Hey! Isn't that where they have the one coffee thingie?"

"A coffee derrick?" Numbuh 1 turned rapidly. "What do they want that for?"

* * *

"Yeah, Abby's sure it's good." Abby waved her hand irritably over the map. "She only got a little taste last time, but she's been wanting some more ever since."

"Well, if ye says so." Stickybeard fingered a caramel in his beard worridly. "But it go against me nature to steal somethin' that ain't candy. Don't know how the boys'll like it."

"Aw, relax, Sticky, this stuff'll put new life into the boys." Smiling, Abby leaned back. "'Sides, Abby hears the Delightful's NEW batch has all kinda sugar and cream and stuff in it. It's hardly even coffee anymore!"

"Well, I did say ya could choose the next target…." With a final look at the map, Sticky turned to Long John. "Whaddaya say, Stupid? When will we be there?"

"Oh, by this evening, I should think, Cap'n." Long John was eying Abby in a slightly strange manner. "If yer sure we wants to attack it."

Sticky deliberated a moment, then thumped the table decisively. "I be a man of me word." Said he. "Call all hands to deck at first sighting!"

"Aye, aye cap'n" Said Long John, but he did not sound overly enthusiastic.

"C'mon, matey." Chuckling, Sticky threw a long arm over Abby's shoulder and dragged her from the cabin. "Let's talk a little, eh?" Out onto the deck he strolled, and pulled her up the ladder after him. As they stepped onto the poop, Sticky nodded to Nough and Latier, the helmsmen. "Leave the wheel a moment, ye hearties, and arm yerselves. We've got a battle coming"

The two Frenchmen need no second bidding, and scurried away. Striding forward easily, the captain grabbed the empty wheel. He looked down at Abby a moment. "Are ye sure now about this place?"

Abby tossed her head back and forth a little. "Mostly. Might not be the easiest place to take, though. Them places was pretty well defended last time I tried this."

"Oh, weapons not a problem, me hearty." Chuckling, Stickybeard grabbed a long wooden lever just to the right of the wheel and pulled.

With a grinding and creaking of gears, the cargo door on the deck slid open. A cannon, much too large for it's own good, rose slowly from the darkness and creaked its way into the sunlight.

"We kept another one of them fer safekeepin'" Sticky explained. "Thought it might come in handy." Chuckling, he looked over. "Might not make the best sense, but fer some things, ye need to trust yer instinct, aye?"

A shrug was his only response. "Shor.' But I still don't know it'll take that thing down. It wuz…"

She was interrupted by a call from the masthead. "Derrick ahoy!"

"All hands on deck!" Sticky roared, suddenly all business. "Long John to the poop deck! Bubbleosa, man the cannons! Nough, Latier, prepare the boarding parties!" He laughed a deep, throaty laugh. "Let's go get us some coffee, me hearties!"

Amidst the approving cheers of the crew, Sticky bent over to confer with Abby. "Listen, lassie. When I asked before about bein' sure, I didn't mean the defenses. Ol' Sticky doesn't care about that." He chuckled. "All I care about is what's inside." Locking eyes with her, he raised his eyebrows. "What I meant to ask was, are ye sure ye want what's inside that thing?"

Abby, hardly listening, eyes fixed dreamily on the horizon, nodded slowly. Her mind was running over the distant memory of her first taste of coffee. "Oh, yeah, baby. Abby wants it."

Sticky's hairy lip curved to a crooked grin. "Then by the powers," He cried, thumping her suddenly and heavily on the back. "it be as good as ours already! Who wants some, lads!?"

The crew roared as the ship bore down on the lone island of steel.

* * *

"Filed account by Sector H of their rescue from Knightbrace by band of pirates, Satellite photo's of movements by ships in Northwest Pennsylvania, report from Sector Q on pirate activity near the deserted ruins of Kandacrunchalan…" Numbuh 1 stopped as he sifted through the sea of papers. "Hello…" He turned to the computer and clicked a few keys. Pictures of ships, operatives, and weather patterns popped up on the screen. He nodded. "That would be where Numbuh 20,000 disappeared."

"Hey, Numbuh 1?" Wally glared at Nigel from sitting atop a mountain of paperwork. "What the crud are we even doing?"

"Finding Numbuh 5, of course." Numbuh 1 didn't even turn. "If we look at the attack points and cross-reference that with the time between each attack, it gets us an idea of their ship's speed and probable home port, which we can then…"

"Yeah, yeah." Wally waved the lecture off. "I know about that. Ya musta explained it to me three times already." He frowned. "Y'know, Numbuh 1, sometimes you're not too far from an adult yourself."

"Would an Adult disobey their superior officer to go seeking after a missing operative?"

Wally shrugged. "Mebbe not. They're more into rules and all that crap. But what I was saying, Numbuh 1, is why are we looking only into where Numbuh 5 is, when we could be out looking for Numbuh 2?"

That got Numbuh 1 to stop. He thought about it for a moment, then turned and faced Wally, folding his hands contemplatively.

"One, Numbuh 2 is in a fixed location where we can quickly find him. Two, Numbuh 5 is among a defined enemy of the KND, while Numbuh 2 is under a more local enemy of the school. And three," Nigel allowed himself to smile. "Numbuh 5 is far too free-spirited to work effectively as a spy for long. She lacks Numbuh 2's natural ability to take and accept commands. This makes her cover less stable."

Numbuh 1 rubbed his hands, rather pleased at the elegant little speech he had just made, then stopped as he saw Numbuh 4's glazed expression.

"Numbuh 4?" No response.

"I gotttttttt it!" The high pitched squeal of the Japanese girl snapped Wally back into reality as Kuki bounced into the room, carrying a purple book bound with locks and clasps. "Here's Numbuh 5's diary!" She frowned. "But she's going to be awful mad if she finds out we looked in it."

"It's alright, Numbuh 3, give it here." Numbuh 1 took the book from the girl and looked at the locks a moment. "Uh… Is there a key to it?"

Numbuh 3 thought a moment. "Oh yeah! There probably is! I'll go get it a quick sec!"

She somersaulted out, and Nigel turned to Wally. "Are you alright?"

"Uh…" Numbuh 4 rubbed his hair and shook his head a moment. "I musta blanked out fer a minute there. I think you were saying something about the local fixation of Numbuh 2, and I was…" He frowned as he thought. "What was I talking about?"

"Oh yeah!" His face cleared and he glared again. "Why the crud are we looking for Numbuh 5 and not Numbuh 2?"

Numbuh 1 groaned and let his head fall onto the computer.

* * *

"Hold fast, me hearties! Keep on! Don't give up hope yet!" Stickybeard shouted from his ship. He chewed his lip. "Lass, you better be right about this!"

Halfway up upon the deck, a small knot of pirates were making a last brave stand. Passion had carried them right into the middle of their foes, and cut them off from the other three parties. Now, they were surrounded on all sides, and just barely holding their ground as their friends madly strove to reach them.

Cutlasses whipped back and forth, slashing and clashing against hard crowbar. Pirates ducked under hissing streams of deadly black coffee that shot out at them from the hoses lining the upper decks. Small explosions of powder puffed out from pistols, sending gumballs into the maddening crowd, and far away the roar of Sticky's cannon could be heard.

All to no avail. Everywhere pirates stopped, stumbled, and fell. The furious noise of the rescuers, once so tantalizing loud, was slowly waning, and pirate glanced to pirate with despair. But still they held on.

In the midst of this swiftly failing party whirled Abby, a veritable dervish fueled by three tanks of caramel mochas. She looked an odd mixture of the child and the corsair, her raven black hair held back by a red bandanna. Her blade flew in a blur of red and white, and a small pistol loaded with sourball pellets was stuck into the belt tied about her ragged blue tunic.

Abby's ponytail whipped about savagely, following her ducking, her spinning and weaving, and all her mad capers. Wherever she went, her ponytail was a scant second behind her. Already it had followed her up the side, across the deck, through several parties of drillmen, and over any obstacle in her way. Now it whipped back and forth, as Abby frantically thought over her next move

To Abby, the world before the fight seemed far, distant, a matter beyond thought. All was lost in the ever present need to out-dodge, out-parry, out-fight the enemy. Her mind whirled with the heat of the caffeine on her brain, and nothing could exist save the deck of steel and the seething animals upon it.

But her friends, behind her, Long John, Bubbleosa, Nough, and Latier, they did exist, and she could not lose herself to the battle.

Quickly she seized upon a plan.

"Get it! Get the tank!" She yelled, and leapt forward once more, toward the huge steaming vat that tempted them with it's fragrant aroma. The pirates gave a weary shout and charged after her.

For a moment it almost seemed they would succeed. The drillmen faltered, stumbled back a moment. The boiling hot streams of coffee wavered a moment, unsure.

The pirates gave a shout, for they saw victory.

And from the upper decks, an answering shout came.

"NOT that tank, you don't!"

Down plunged a furious blur of yellow and white, and landed on the deck to slow to a skinny skeleton of a man who seemed in a constant flurry of motion. An enormous white ten-gallon hat sat atop his head, and white eyes, stark against his olive-brown skin, shot about with the insanity of energy.

"That's my special high-sugar quintuiple-caffineated java you're looking at there!" A grin twisted his unnaturally wide smile. "NO-body gets to touch it!"

"Cuppa Joe!" Abby dashed to the front of the line.

The foreman's eyebrows shot up, then down, in a queer, jerky fashion. "Well, if it ain't the little girl who came here two years back!" He grinned again. "Come for a second taste a' what I gave ya last time?!"

"Y-you c-can't hold me back this time, Joe!" Abby was grinning a little herself, and her eyes were also wide. "I've grown!"

"Then let's DANCE, little girl!" Joe drew his lips back in a hideous, yellow-stained smile.

"Yer on!"

The two shot about the deck, blue and yellow bouncing off each other. Pirates and drillmen alike tumbled back from the wake of their battle, the deck cracked beneath their feet. Floor, stairs, tanks, walls… all were fair ground as the two shot back and forth across the battleground, sending combatants flying.

"You have grown, coffee bean!" Joe jumped ten feet in the air, landing on a crane. "But coffee ain't learned in a day. It's an **acquired** taste!"

"Abby acquired it the day she tasted the stuff!" Abby shot up the pillar of the crane and dashed out the long arm. "She's a quick learner!"

Joe rushed forward in a blur of yellow, and Abby leapt high above him, crashing onto the long reaching metal. The crane groaned, and veered down a few inches before slowly moaning back to steadiness. They stood exactly as they had before, but with their positions reversed.

Dancing on tiptoe, Joe studied the wild pirate. "It ain't all coffee in you, little girl. You got a_ fire_ on in there somewhere!" He chuckled and bounced up and down. "But it can't burn forever, and it ain't got near as much fuel as I got cooking up here!"

"Bring it, skinny boy." Abby's mouth twisted in a smirk.

Joe's eyes narrowed. "You'll pay for that." He snarled. "Not even you can dodge my hyper-caffinated kick! It took you down before, and it'll do it again!"

Joe gave a little grin. "Say yer prayers, little girl! Hii---yaaaaah!!!!"

The blur of yellow shot forward, the air about it crackling with the energy of his speed. Heat flamed on the trail, and the steel grew red and soft as he dashed at the small little girl on the end of the derrick.

But she was no longer there.

Abby had waited until the very last possible moment, but the second Joe drew back for his attack, she had dropped to her knees and slung herself beneath the cranes long arm, where she now hung, three hundred feet above the concrete and steel.

Carried by his own momentum, Joe could not stop, and went flying from the end. The speed that only he could have generated carried him far, far out from the platform, out into sea. Abby, from her perch, could just barely make out the enormous splash he made as he hit the water.

And then, the splash became a plume, a rising wake of water, like you see behind a huge powerboat. It grew larger, and larger, shooting toward the lone platform, crashing through the fleet surrounding, dashing straight up the pillar, back onto the deck….

And there it tripped over Abby, who had dashed back to the deck as soon as she had seen the plume.

A dripping, hatless Joe picked himself from the deck, eyes gleaming with a fiery malice. "You thought'd that stop me? I run on these waters all the time!"

"Uh-huh." Abby stood there grinning, eyes still wide. "But that far? I don't think you've ever had to run back a distance you jumped _yourself_. Musta used up a lot of that fuel yer so proud of."

Eyes twitching, Joe stepped forward. "I've… I've still got… I've…" He stopped, realizing something. "S… s…say, what's happening, anyway? I… I… I ain't… ain't… felt…" His eyes slowed. "Wha… wha is this?"

"Yer getting sleepy, Joe." Abby grinned as the tall skinny man stumbled forward, groping helplessly about. "See, something I figured out about coffee last time I tried the stuff, is that after it wears off, you don't have no energy left over." Casting a thoughtful look around the battlefield, which was suddenly filling with pirates, she knelt to talk better with the red-eyed cowboy crawling on the deck. "I figure, you just ward it off by continually taking more and more cups of the stuff."

"Ain't…. ain't… years" Joe gasped. "Can't…" his fingers twitched. "Coffeeeeeeeee…"

But sooner or later…" Abby grinned, "it's gonna catch up with ya."

Joe's eyes rolled up in his head, and his head fell to the deck.

"Take a good nap, Joe." Abby patted the man's head. "Abby figures you got at least six years of sleep to catch up on."

And then Abby collapsed beside him.

* * *

"Well, this explains a lot." Numbuh 1 thumbed through the diary with great interest. "I always did wonder what she was doing in the mountains that one time."

"Oh, look!" Numbuh 4 pointed eagerly. "Says something here about her fighting some big mummy thingie!"

"Are you suuuure Numbuh 5 won't mind us reading this?" Kuki hovered about the two boys, chewing her lip. "She said it was reeeeeal secret!"

"Oh, don't worry, Numbuh 3." Nigel turned on her with an annoyed expression. "We'll just read the important parts. Oh, look!" He suddenly was back at the diary. "It mentions Maurice again right here!"

"There's some drawings in these early ones too." Numbuh 3 tilted his head as he bent the pages to look back. "Some pictures of a kid in a light blue shirt with some dorky glasses."

Numbuh 1's eyes suddenly got very wide.

"Well." He said, as he shut the book very decisively. "We've managed to ascertain that there's no mention of the pirate's base location in her diary, so we can't use it anymore." Ignoring Wally's protests, he locked the book shut and tucked it under the desk. "In any case, Numbuh 3 is quite correct, we should not spy on the private matters of our teammate."

"Awww." Numbuh 4 sat back and crossed his arms. "There were some cool pictures of a giant spider-arm bot thing there too."

"Moving on." Nigel silenced him with a wave. "We've logged all encounters and events with the pirates in the database, including the ones noted in the diary, and the one you told us about on Halloween."

"Yeah." A snort noted 4's disgust. "Cruddy captain."

"With that information." Numbuh 1 gestured toward Kuki. "Numbuh 3, could you please run a location analysis and have the computermabob locate the base?"

"Huh?" Kuki had been staring at Numbuh 4. "Oh, yeah! Okie-dokie!"

She bounced out the door, humming cheerfully.

There was a short pause of silence. Numbuh 1's finger rubbed his chin thoughtfully as he sat in his chair. He seemed to be thinking about something. Numbuh 4 stared about the room, quickly grew bored, and then glanced at Nigel.

"How does it feel to be going against command for once?" Wally smirked at Nigel's small start at being interrupted from his reverie. "Usually, you're telling us all these cruddy things we have to follow and all these procedures that command has laid out and all sorts of stoopid stuff like that." He folded his arms confidently and stared at his commander. "Ain't this disobeying the rules?"

"First of all, Numbuh 4, Procedures are immensely important things." Nigel glared at Wally. "Immensely." He adjusted his sunglasses. "Secondly, what we are doing here is for the overall good of Kids everywhere, and thus quite in keeping with the ideals of KND. And third," Nigel seemed to relax, or deflate, as he said this. "Numbuh 5 is, after all, a member of our team. I think a little freedom is in order."

Numbuh 4 grinned triumphantly.

"Plus," And here Nigel himself smiled. "The operation does not exist officially, and therefore we haven't been officially ordered to not intervene, and so, officially, we're not doing anything wrong.

"Aw, crud!" Wally suddenly lost his good temper. "For a moment there I thought you were actually fun!"

Ignoring the comment, Nigel turned to face Kuki as she cartwheeled into the room. "Well?"

"All done!" Numbuh 3 squealed, running up to Nigel on her toes and throwing him a paper. "But the computer thingie isn't smart enough!"

"What?" Wally sat up.

"_Insufficent data_." Nigel read from the sheet. "_Analysis incomplete_."

Slumping back, Wally crossed his arms. "Stupid computer." He mumbled.

"Oh, come on, Numbuh 4, it's not that bad!" Kuki bounced over to him and smiled at him. "It gave us a little shaded area that he's probably inside somewhere."

"A little shaded area that's two thousand square feet wide." Nigel commented drily.

"Crud!" Wally sunk deeper into his chair. "Now whadda we do?"

Rubbing his chin, Nigel glanced toward his desk. "We need to look up a friend… an **old** friend."

* * *

"You sure you okay, matey?" Stickybeard eyed the girl wrapped in the blanket. "You were doin' some pretty fancy stuff out there! The boys tell me they ain't seen nothing like it before!"

"Yeah, yeah, Abby's jes' fine." Rubbing her eyes, Abby glanced around the cabin again. After she had collapsed, Long John had burst through carried her back to the ship while the pirates fought out the rest of the battle. For some reason she had been put in the captain's quarters to recover from her coffee binge. "Did you handle Derek like ah told ya to?"

"Arr, matey, there wasn't no problem to that a'tall!" Leaning back, Sticky grinned widely. "As soon as he stood up, we just gave him a couple rounds with the big gun, and he splashed right into the ocean and never got up."

"Thas good." Abby grinned. "And did y'all try that coffee like I told you to?"

"Er…" Sticky looked away and rubbed the back of his hairy neck. "Not meself, no. I'm too old to change me ways. But the rest of the boys, they broke open kegs of the stuff, and they like it plenty." Glancing at her, he continued in a puzzled tone. "By the way, the boys have gotten real perky all of a sudden. They swabbed the decks in five minutes flat!"

There was a real smile on Abby's face. "Glad to hear it. I hope you boys left some fer Abby, didn't'cha?

"Of course we did." Sticky waved the question away. "Five kegs o' the stuff, like ye asked fer. And there's plenty more in the cargo where that came from. This here is the biggest hall we ever had!" He smiled. "Ye was right about one thing. "There was loads o' sugar aboard there. Almost more sugar than coffee, really!"

"Yeah." Abby gave a little nod. "I know."

"And cream! And caramel and ice cream and milk and…" Sticky paused and smiled at her. "Thunder, some of the things there we don't even know what they is! Nough and Latier, now, they went rooting around in some of them labs down there, and they found this weird, green-looking stuff. It looks like that toxic stuff you see in movies!" He rubbed his beard. "Those two didn't dare touch it, but they thought you might wanna see… brought it back here. Called 'Monster' or somethin' like that. I'd steer clear of it if I were you. But we did find some of those mochas you were talkin' about."

"Ya did!?" Abby's eyes lit up. "I gotta see this!" She thrust a skinny leg out of bed.

"Matey!" Suddenly, Sticky was out of his chair and beside the bed. "Ye shouldn't be getting up and walking about like this!"

Abby dismissed him with a wave. "Abby feels fine. 'Sides, she'll feel a powerful sight better once she's had a gulp of that mocha stuff you was talking about."

Sticky shrugged and moved out of her way.

Together they stepped from the hot salty cabin into the fresh sea breeze. Pirates were rushing about the deck with a vigor that made Abby smile. The sails snapped smartly in the morning breeze, and the freshly scrubbed decks gave no hint of the battle that had just occurred.

Together the huge fat pirate and the small skinny girl climbed the ladder to the poop deck. Long John stood at the wheel, eyes closed, feeling the wind whistle through his hair.

"John!" Sticky shouted, and the helmsman started from his dream. "Go down to the hold and get me first mate some of them mocha things we took this morning! And grab one fer yerself, if ye wants!"

"Aye, aye, cap'n!" John saluted and left the helm.

With a sigh of happiness, Sticky stepped up to the spinning wheel and stopped it with his hand. Seasoned by weeks at sea, Abby could sense rather than feel the rudder far below shuddering into position, moving the ship to the pirate's command.

For a moment they stood there, feeling the breeze, watching the gulls dance off the waves, and listening to the crash of water on the stern. Then Sticky sighed again and turned to Abby.

"You know what's the greatest part about being a cap'n, Matey?"

Abby shrugged, bringing up a hand to shield her eyes from the sun. "Abby doesn't know. What?"

"Ye gets to do absolutely whatever ye wants." Sticky chuckled. "Take now, fer instance. If I wants to just sit up here on the deck with me first mate and just feel the wind in me beard, why, all I has to do is say the word, and matey, tis' done!" He sighed contentedly. "Ah, but the life of a pirate be a happy one."

Abby snorted. "Yeah, fer the captain, anyway." She flicked a small termite off the wheel. "Everybody else on the ship has to do what you say."

Surprised at her tone, Sticky turned to face her, raising his eyebrows. A thoughtful silence passed as the two stood there.

"Matey?"

Surprised, Abby turned to see Stickybeard proffering her the wheel. "How would ye like to take the _Sweet Revenge_ fer a spin?"

The proposal was so unexpected that it took Abby a few moments to understand what the captain had said.

"But… you… I…" She fumbled for words. "Yer the captain!"

Sticky shrugged. "Doesn't mean I can't let me trusted friends have a turn at command, does it?"

The unshakeable Abigail Lincoln found herself at a loss for words.

Without a word, or even hardly a glance away, as if she was afraid it would vanish, Abby stepped up to the enormous wheel. Sticky moved quietly away as her fingers curled around the ragged old wood, feeling it, drinking in what it might mean.

And then he let go.

The wheel shuddered, sensing its new owner. Abby felt the ebb and swell of the water beneath push against her hands, striving for mastery. Feeling a momentary panic, she gave it a push back.

"Now, just take it easy." She felt the sticky fuzz of red beard against her ear. "Relax, and hold it steady. Just keep the course. Don't worry about the wind, or the waves, or where yer going, or where ye been. Just focus on keeping the course."

Abby listened. She held the wheel.

"And if ye can do that." She heard a small smile come into the pirate's voice. "If ye can forget all the troubles and problems that ye thought were important about sailing… Then mebbe ye can feel it."

"Feel what?" Abby did not turn her eyes to glance behind, but kept them focused on the wide, blue expanse of the sea before her.

"The real wonder of the open sea." Came the whisper. "It's Freedom. Standing at the wheel, with the ship in yer hand, looking at the open sea, and knowing, just knowing… that ye can go absolutely anywhere, anywhere ye wants to."

Abby closed her eyes.

"That's what it means to have a pirate ship. That's the pirate's life. That's the sea. " Continued the voice. "That's freedom."

There was a silent pause, and Abby just listened to the wind and the waves.

"Can ye feel it, matey? Can ye feel the sea?"

"Oh yeah." Eyes still shut, Abby nodded. "I can feel it."

* * *

----Epilogue----

The room was dark, dirty, and dismal, scarcely fit to spend a day in, much less a life. Water dripped down the cold stone walls to the hard concrete below. In one corner stood a small toilet, in another, a rough cot, and in another, a half-eaten meal of… something. Pictures of a hamburger, a milkshake, and a pirate ship were posted by the bed, just next to some writing that the person seemed to have scrawled on the wall out of boredom. "_Ich grolle nicht..._" Read the first line.

The occupant could only be made out by the dark shape in the bed that was so much darker than the darkness of the room. The rythmnic movement of a bulge showed where his chest was, and that he was asleep. He did not seem to be having very pleasant dreams, for occasionally he twitched, and once he muttered something.

And then suddenly he started, coming awake with an inarticulate cry. He sat straight up, gazing fearfully at a pitch-black corner of his room.

"Heinrich Von Marzipan." Whispered a voice, with just a hint of a British accent. "How would you like… to be free?"

* * *

**--A/N: Please Review!--**

Yes! Please do! It will light me on my path to illumination! It will make me write more! Or, if you really hate this, review, and I may stop bugging you!

Anyway. I am really sorry this one took so long, and that it ended up so, well, huge. But life is crazy, and I had a lot of material to get through. Maybe I should have broken it into two chapters, but that would have been awkward.

Oh! Quick question! If anyone gets any of the references in this one, or if they can guess at what the theme of this series is, please write and let me know! I'll…. I don't know, do something, I guess.

Next chapter: Sector V talks things over with Heinrich, while Hoagie and Baruchli discuss the value of doing things you don't want to. But a threat is arising…


	13. Separation of Church and State

**Ich grolle nicht und wenn das Herz auch bricht.  
Ewig verlor'nes Lieb, ich grolle nicht.  
Wie du auch strahlst in Diamantenpracht,  
es fällt kein Strahl in deines Herzens Nacht.**

**Das weiss ich längst. Ich sah dich ja im Traume,  
Und sah die Nacht in deines Herzens Raume,  
Und sah die Schlang', die dir am Herzen frißt,  
Ich sah, mein Leib, wie sehr du elend bist.**

English translation

_I bear no grudge, even though my heart may break,  
eternally lost love! I bear no grudge.  
However you may shine in the splendor of your diamonds,  
no ray of light falls in the darkness of your heart._

_I have long known this, I saw you in a dream,  
and saw the night within the void of your heart,  
and saw the serpent that is eating your heart-  
I saw, my love, how very miserable you are._

Of course, none of Sector V's remaining operatives could read German, so none of them understood the poem carefully inscribed on the cell wall. Heinrich knew what the words meant, after all, he had written them. But just right now, his mind was on other matters than prison graffiti.

"You haf said you come to offer freedom." He sat on the edge of his bunk, flabby chin sunk in his hand, staring intently at the dimly visible operatives. "But how do I know you speak truly? You of the Kids Next Door haf not been very trustworthy in the past."

"Listen here, you." The shortest of the three shadows moved forward. "You've got some nerve to be talkin' about…"

"At ease, Numbuh 4." The quiet voice, the one that he had heard first, and the one who had continued to explain the whole situation to him, now spoke again. "It's a good question." The shadow moved again, and Heine caught the glint of sunglasses turning to face him. "To answer your question, Heinrich Von Marzipan, I must be honest with you. We have reason to believe that one, or possibly two, of our fellow operatives are in grave danger. Time is of the essence, and you are the quickest means to find them. To do this, we are willing to… arrange your release from the KND Artic prison where you have been held."

"To vhich I owe thanks to your friend, Abigail Lincoln." Heinrich sneered. "Zo, vhy should I work to help you?"

"Cause otherwise yer gonna spend the rest of your life in this icecube." Snorted the smaller shadow.

"Numbuh 4." The quiet voice sounded irritated. Then, returning to him. "He has a point. You are not exactly in a bargaining position. However, aside from that, the matter has certain points to it. It may be time to lay aside your grudge, and simply consider what is the best thing to do."

There was a short moment of silence as Heinrich thought. He was fairly certain who these three were now. And the quiet voice had said one or two others might be in trouble. Who the other one was did not interest him, but the emphasis on laying aside his grudge made it fairly certain that they needed his help with Abigail.

He nodded. "Explain it to me again. Vhat do you need mein help for?"

A short pause, and then the quiet voice came through the darkness again, sounding slightly embarrassed. "We have something of a problem."

* * *

"What kind of problem?" Leaning back in his chair, rubbing his chin with his hand, Hoagie did his best to look contemplative. Despite some grumpiness at being woken up so early, he felt smug at having been invited to this session. It let him in on the important decisions, and yet he didn't have to bear any of the responsibility.

"A courier joined the fleet just this morning, bearing important despatches from Spinachia." Spinachoza unfolded a crinkling parchment, stopping a moment to frown at Hoagie's feet thrust up on the table. "It indicates that the Moores are gathering up in full strength. Brother Lettucola thinks they may be planning an attack."

"Impossible." Vespinachuci frowned. "The Moores, they have no ships, no fleet. We destroy them in last attack, _verdad_? Is impossible they come across the Straits again."

"Yes." Spinachoza tugged at the loose skin hanging beneath his neck. "But possibly they have gained some new allies, who could carry them across."

The captain's eyebrows shot up. "_Si_, that is possible. But where…?"

"Um, guys?" Hoagie felt very confused. "No offense, but that message is probably a couple days old. I got a feeling it might be outdated already."

"That is what makes it so important." Spinachoza turned his burning eyes on Hoagie for a mere instant. "We may already be needed there. We must return to repulse the Moores immediately."

"Return?" Hoagie sat up, his feet sliding from the table. "B—b—b—but hang on just a minute! We can't leave right now! It's the middle of the night! Everybody'll be awful grumpy at being woken up so early!"

"A sailor of His King's Navy," Vespinachuci spoke with dignity, "Ever is ready to assist his country. He understand the call of duty, even as you, or I." He smote his chest.

"Oh, come on." Hoagie snorted. "How bad can these Moores people be, anyway?"

Almost immediately Hoagie wished he hadn't said it. The other two fell silent, and turned on him. Spinachoza's face showed nothing definite, the only thing you could say was that his face was so expressionless as to achieve a whole new expression. It seemed almost deathlike in its very immobility. But it was nothing to Vespinachuci's face.

The Spinachian captain stared at, or rather past, Hoagie with a strange mixture of disbelief and disembodied wrath. Though his anger did not seem focused at the small boy, Hoagie felt suddenly very small and scared.

"So!" He said, hiding behind a sudden smile. "Where are we going to again?"

* * *

"The Candy Bar." Came the quiet voice.

"How is it you come to know of zat?" Heinrich could not hide his surprise.

"We have sources." The voice did not seem to want to discuss it.

"Are you sure Numbuh 5 won't mind about that, by the way?" This voice was new, a high-pitched, slightly accented tone. "I told her…"

"Silence, Numbuh 3!" The quiet voice barked.

Heinrich restrained a small smile. Numbuh 5. Indeed. So this was about Abigail. More and more interesting.

"In any case," the voice regained control of itself. "we do know of it, and all we need know is the location." There was a slight pause, and then the voice continued in a slightly more disinterested tone. "We could, of course, find it through the use of our satellites, but that would take time, and time happens to be of the essence."

"Huh!" snorted the short shadow. "Like Global Command would let us do that anyway."

"I said shut up!"

"Zo." Heinie said, just as if he had not heard this last exchange. "Vat you mean to say is, you do not need me, but I could make things easier for you."

"Exactly." The words were accompanied by a light sigh. "You may, of course, refuse if you so desire, but I must ask you to take a look at the larger picture involved here."

* * *

"Yeah, yeah." Hoagie grumbled. "But I'm still not crazy at working like this so late at night."

Vespinachuci cocked a dark eyebrow. "My son, you are not thinking clearly. Look at all the men," He indicated the dark bustling deck with his hand. "You do not see any sailor shirking his duty, do you?"

"No." Hoagie snorted. "But only cause you have that one big guy with the whip standing over them like that."

A cloud passed over Vespinachuci's face. "As you say, yes. But we cannot allow the lazy to receive the same reward as the diligent, nor can we let the fate of the ship hang upon merely the whims of men, _verdad_? The bos'un is not the most… _que es la palabra_… the most gentle way to ensure the men do as they should, but he is needed nonetheless." He turned to Hoagie. "Have you never wished for someone, one to make you do as you should?"

"Well…" Hoagie frowned. "I have my mom."

"Of course!" Vespinachuci smiled, but it seemed a little strange. "The bos'un, he is much like your mother!"

"Hey! He is not!" Hoagie turned swiftly. "Sure, mom's a little chubby, but that's not any…"

"_Que?_ Oh, no, no!" Vespinachuci waved his hands wildly. "_Lo siento_… You must forgive me, my son. I did not mean… I…" His voice suddenly seemed overcome by either tears or laughter, Hoagie could not tell which. "I feel… I beg pardon… I…" he gasped, then descended into convulsions again. "Oh, _por Dios_," he finally wheezed out, wiping his eyes. "No, no, that is not what I mean. I intend to say, they play the same role."

Hoagie did not exactly know how to react to this, and a sort of uncomfortable silence settled over the two.

* * *

Heinrich finally broke the silence, with a somewhat knowing smile. "You say you need my help vit one of your operatives, but you haf, vit und notable skill, not said vhich one. Who is it that you need mein help with?"

There was a long and somewhat awkward silence. The two shadows looked at the middle one, apparently waiting for him, but he himself seemed a trifle unsure. Heinrich waited in delightful patience, becoming more certain of himself each moment.

Finally it came out. "The operatives," the middle one said, in an official and somewhat hasty manner, "who we have lost contact with, are Numbuhs 2 and 5 of Sector V. Their real names, are of course, sooper secret information not to be entrusted to a criminal such as yourself…"

"Abigail Lincoln!" Heinrich spat out the words with a mixture of venom and relish. "Zat is who you speak of, is it not?"

"Well…"

"Und vhy do you seek to hide this from me?" He continued, without waiting for the quiet voice to finish. "What else do you seek to hide from me? It is not enough you ask me to betray mein old friends und shipmates, not enough you hide that I must help mein old rival, but what else have you not told me?"

* * *

"Hey, captain?" Hoagie had spoken for the first time in a minute and a half, and the tall Spaniard glanced at him with mild surprise. "Could I ask you a kinda personal question? There are still a couple things I don't get."

"You have but to state it, and I shall answer." Vespinachuci lifted his chin proudly.

"Uh… right." Hoagie had still not quite gotten used to the captain. "You're the captain of the Spinach armada, right?"

"The Royal Admiral of his Majesty's Most Holy Armada, Emissary of his Healthiness Bedecine the Fourth, and Right Honorable Member of the Knights of St. Felix." Vespinchuci nodded. "Yes, that is me. Why do you ask?"

"Well, I was just wondering." Hoagie toyed with the cord around his waist. "Why do you work so hard for Spinachia, when you hate the stuff? You never did quite explain that to me."

Vespinachuci, for once, was silent.

"I mean, you said the king made everyone. But the king himself said he didn't like it. And now that I'm here, I find that actually, Father Spinachoza is the one who forces everyone to eat it. But none of that really means anything, because he stays in the Inquisition castle all the time, and his men aren't everywhere, and…"

"What you mean to say, Brother Hoagie?" Vespinachoza asked him, rather shortly.

"Well…" Hoagie stuttered. "You guys are at sea so much of the time, you wouldn't have to eat spinach at all. So why do you? I mean, if you don't have to…" His voice trailed off and he looked up helplessly at the captain.

Captain Amerigo Vespinachuci did not reply immediately, but sat in thought a moment. His dark gloved hand stroked his rich brown beard and tugged absentmindedly at his olive ears. He studied the boy thoughtfully for a long while, and when he replied, it was in a high, somewhat abstracted tone, as if he was still thinking of the answer as he said it.

"It is… difficult to explain. Like I say earlier, I have no love for the Spin-ach. I eat for many year, yet no like. Is greasy, and slimy, and tastes like… like…" He gestured vaguely. "Ah, you know what I mean." He sighed.

"I no like the Spinach. Yet I have seen and I know that the Spinach is the best for me, yes? It is through the blessing of Spinach that our people have grown strong and great."

"Perhaps I explain. When I very small, Spinachia fighting war, big war. The chocolate people, you know, the ones we speak of earlier, the Moores? They take over half of Spinachia. The Moores, they love the sugar, the candy. Perhaps you hear of the people of the Sugar Sands? They live there now. The Moores, they say, you eat only what you like. They always eating more, more (that's what we call them, you see,) because they always wanting more, more. The chocolate people, they do whatever they feel like."

"But the Spinach Inquisition, they say, no, you must eat always what is good for you, what is right. So they fight the Moores. They unite the people of Spinachia, and under the blessing of the great Spinach, they fight the chocolate people, and drive them from our shores." Vespinachuci gave Hoagie a questioning glance. "You see? It make sense."

"K—i—i—inda." Hoagie was cautious. "But I still don't get it. You don't like Spinach. I think you would like candy. So why do you serve Spinach?"

"Aaaah!" Vespinachuci pounded the railing with sudden passion. "No! NO! _Usted no comprende nada! Usted_…" he stopped and drew a deep breath. "I sorry. You not understand. I explain more. The question is not what you like to do, but what you should do. Perhaps I not like to eat the Spinach, but I should, so I do."

"You see…" the captain paused and pursed his lips. "When I young, my family keep old inn. We…"

"That will be enough, captain."

Hoagie and Vespinachuci started apart. Father Spinachoza was standing just out of the shadows, a curiously somber look on his long, pale face. How long he had been there, it was impossible to say.

"There is no need to go over that again." Spinachoza nodded at Vespinachuci, who seemed nervous. "Trouble yourself about it no more."

The captain nodded and relaxed.

"I have some important information I must relate to you." With a convulsive jerk of his neck, he nodded to the cabin. "Kindly wait for me in the cabin a moment, and I will tell you."

* * *

"We have told you all we know ourselves!" The voice spoke quietly still, but there was an undeniable urgency in its tone. "There is nothing more we're hiding! The only reason we didn't tell you that is because we figured you wouldn't feel so ready to give help if you knew."

Heinrich said nothing. He sat and stared at the dark.

The voice waited, then continued. "Heinrich, we know how you feel about Numbuh 5." 

A small smile curved the fat boy's mouth.

"We know the rivalry you two had, the way you've chased each other across the globe, the mess-up with the rabbit business, the reason why you came after her the other time, we even know how she rescued you and brought you back here a couple months ago. And we also know, it's not easy to forget all that and work all of a sudden to try and help her."

The voice took a deep breath. "But you have to, Heinrich. It's the best thing for you, the best thing for her, the best thing for the KND, but more importantly, it is the RIGHT thing for everyone."

"You're not a hero. You're a candy hunter. You seek the sweet, the juicy and the succulent, what you want and desire. According to what we know, you're never thought about what you should do. Well…" There was a vague gesturing of the shadows at the wall. "Look where it's landed you."

Heinrich looked around and grimaced.

"But you can change that. For once, you, Heinrich Von Marzipan, have a chance to set aside your own goals and work for a greater one. To do what you should, rather than what you would."

A much longer pause. Not even the other two voices were speaking now.

"What will you do, Heinrich Von Marzipan?"

* * *

There was a short interlude of silence, and then the tall priest turned to the short boy.

"As for you, brother Hoagie." He said, "I might suggest you get your experiment together. We may need it by morning."

"Sure." Hoagie was still staring at the door to the cabin. "But, ummm… what was the whole thing…"

A sigh escaped the priest mouth, like a light hissing of steam. "Brother Hoagie, there are many stories of the Reclamation, some happy, others not so." He bent down, quite a distance for him, and stared at the boy. "All that you need know is that events moved so that the captain came to understand he could no longer act completely as he wished."

Hoagie stared back at the priest. "But… how did…"

"No more." The priest stood back up, and with a great sweep of his green robes, he turned and entered the cabin.

* * *

"Zere is no more that needs to be said." Heinrich looked down at his hands. "As und matter of fact, I feel you haf misunderstood me."

The shadows moved, disturbing the patterns of light. He could almost say they looked confused.

"Mein thoughts haf run on many things within these walls." He cast a look back toward the hamburger photo and the poem scrawled on the concrete. "Many time has mein mind thought through those very thing that you now tell me."

He looked back, a strangely penetrating gleam in his eyes. "Dere are more things between Abigail Lincoln und meinself, many more den you haf said." His lips curved into a smile, almost more sad then happy. "But it is true, that looking back, I see that she has been mein only true friend, and the one who has always seen me for what I truly am."

A sudden frown rumpled across his face, but he conquered it and moved on. "These thoughts haf not been pleasant, und I haf longed for a chance to show meinself worthy, to redeem meinself. I was angry because you did not tell mein this, und so I might have been cheated of such a chance."

There was a momentary silence, and then the quiet voice spoke. "And now?"

* * *

Hoagie was still standing out on deck as the captain emerged from the cabin. Without looking, he heard Vespinachuci walk over and lean against the railing next to him. The two of them stood staring out at the stars

Strangely, neither felt an inclination to continue their earlier conversation, and they spent some time in quiet contemplation of the reddening sky before Vespinachuci spoke.

"We will very much need your ship, brother Hoagie. It is early still, but you like to go, start it up, so that ships, they no need to pull? We will get there much faster."

Hoagie thought about it, shrugged. "Yeah, sure. I can do that."

* * *

"And now?" said the voice, when Heinrich did not immediately reply. "Now, do you feel ready to help us find your old friend, your old enemy, Abigail Lincoln?"

With a shrug, Heinrich smiled at the shadows. "I bear no grudge." He said.

* * *

YEEEHA! All through the boring stuff! Now to the yummy filling!

Things will pick up soon, promise. Many thanks to the faithful few who still read this and REVIEW! If you're one of the newcomers, then please review also! Flame it, Fave it, I don't care! Just let me know!

Nigel acts kinda out of character here, but I needed it to get across SOMEHOW. Ideally, this would be Numbuh 5 saying it, but obviously, she's not here.

Oh, haven't done this before, but figure I should. KND is property of Cartoon Network and Mr. Warburton, and "Ich grolle Nicht" is property of Heinrich Heine (seriously), and Schumann after him.

Next Chapter: Global Command closes in on the renegade sector, but the rescue team manages to get away. Still, there may be something even the great Nigel Uno has forgotten about…


	14. Broken Mirrors

It was midnight, and all was quiet in the Sector V treehouse. The TV room was empty. The snack bar was empty. The flight bay was empty. No one could be found in any of the bedrooms or any of the equipment sub-levels.

Deep in the control room, surrounded by thousands of blinking lights and flashing screens, Nigel Uno sat in a ripped old easy chair. His head was leaned forward in meditative silence, and the blinking lights gleamed off his cold sunglasses as if he did not even notice them. He did not start at the sudden beeping from the radar warning system, nor did he jump as a dull boom shook the Treehouse.

Nigel Uno did not move, but his left eyebrow did cock upwards. "They're early." He noted.

* * *

Wally raised an eyebrow as Kuki ran up. "Hey! What're you so early for?" 

"Hey Wally, hey Heinie!" Kuki waved happily as she bounced up the creaking dock toward the dark boat at the end. "Numbuh One told me to run over here and tell you guys to get going!"

"Vhat for?" Heinrich cocked his head, puzzled. He sat in the front of the boat, under the careful guard of 4's mustard pistol.

Kuki shrugged as she jumped in, letting the boat dip slightly in the dark waves. "I dunno. He was looking over some files on the computer and he just told me to go down here and go with you guys.'

"That vas not der plan!" Heinrich looked rather alarmed.

"It's what Numbuh 1 said!" Kuki answered, looking very earnest

Numbuh 4 shrugged. "Ah, whatevah. I was getting bored of sitting here anyway. Let's shove off."

Silently and swiftly the boat vanished into the darkness.

* * *

Nigel turned to the door and nodded familiarly at the shapes materializing from the darkness. "Ah, Numbuh 44. And Numbuh 44. And Numbuh 86. So pleased to see you." 

"Not for long, you won't be, Numbuh One." The global tactician snarled. "Figures you'd be in the computer chamber. Been spending a lot of time in here lately?"

Nigel shrugged. "I suppose so."

"Whatcha been doing?" Fanny arched a dangerous eyebrow. "Checking the radar, or just making polite conversation with the thing?"

"It's better than talking to some people." Numbuh 1 just barely restrained a smile at Fanny's furious expression. "Which reminds me… What did you come here for, again?"

Numbuh 86 signaled the twins, and they moved on either side of Numbuh One. "Nigel Uno, you're under arrest for insubordination, conspiring with known KND enemies, releasing prisoners without authorization, and releasing information to ex-KND operatives."

"Such as…?" Nigel raised an eyebrow.

"Tommy Gilligan." Fanny snorted. "And ya should've gotten someone else. The boy's a-BOUT as sneaky as an elephant in a cherry tree."

* * *

Tommy Gilligan crouched low in the front of his Tommyboat as the dark shapes of the towers on the shore drew closer. _Once again, as the world cries out for justice_. He thought. _The Tommy is called to bring justice to the… un-justified. Or something._ He frowned and crouched lower in the Tommyboat, wishing it didn't look so much like an inner tube. _The last hope of the Kids Next Door rests in his capable hands, for if he fails, the world fails with him._

For a moment the thought actually frightened him, but he shook it off and continued. _Deep within the fortress of the enemy, lies a poor, forsaken operative, denied justice by all the world. In his darkest hour, he cries out to the Tommy, and… Ouch!_

A quick jerk of his foot drew it back from the spiny green weeds that seemed to line the shore. They might not hurt so much, but they were grosssss.

With a little sigh, Tommy straightened himself out and continued to paddle forward, being careful to keep his feet high up. He wondered if he should have done this. Mom would be awful angry if she found out how late he was past his bedtime, and this wasn't exactly the most 'Tommy-like' work. Besides, Numbuh One had never exactly helped him before.

_But wait! The Tommy gives justice to all! Wherever children cry for justice, the Tommy will be there! _ And besides, it was so coooool to do stuff with Hoagie and his pals! And Sonia had been all gapey and wide-eyed when he had told her at lunch!

_Yes, the Tommy would do it!_ Tommy straightened up in the inner tube, forgetful of the weeds. _The Tommy will save the day as never before, and kids for ages to come will remember the name of the Tommy as a harbinger of hope and justice! For he is a rumor in the shadows, a whisper in the darkness…_

The black night was suddenly split apart by a piercing white beam of light sweeping back and forth across the waves.

* * *

"But you still didn't catch him." Nigel pointed out. 

"Don't look at me, BOY!" Fanny sneered at him. "We had him covered from Day One. Your little plan never had a chance of getting past us."

Leaning back in his chair, Nigel risked a grin. "But you still didn't get him."

"We could have if we wanted to!" Numbuh 86 screamed at him, livid with rage. "In fact, we almost did get him! The only reason we didn't pick him up is because the operative watching him forgot to tell us in time!" Feeling that a glare at Nigel was not getting anywhere, she moved it onto 44 and 44, who shifted nervously. "Anyway, it's not like we even need to worry. That little squirt couldn't rescue a hamster in a block of cheese! He won't even get as far as 3 and 4." She smirked. "_They_ at least have a girl along."

Nigel ignored her. "You're a little early." He noted. "I didn't think Kid's Next Door Artic Prison would piece it all together for another five minutes or so."

"Of course they wouldn't, with that BOY in charge there." Fanny snorted. "But as Global Tactical Officer, I figured things out a lot faster than…"

"Fanny, stop it already." Numbuh 362 pushed her way through the surrounding troops. With a curt nod, she motioned 44 and 44 back and faced Nigel. "We didn't have to wait for that, Numbuh 1. Numbuh 60 told us all about it before they even bothered to search."

"Numbuh 60?" Nigel could not hide his surprise. "But how did he know?"

* * *

"I just talked to him for a minute while we were leaving Artic Prison." Numbuh 4 leaned against the side of the boat, comfortable, at ease, as the boat slid through the water. "Talked over some of the old days and the stuff we usedta do." 

"You used to know Numbuh 60?" Numbuh 3 gazed at him, wide eyed. "When was that?"

Numbuh 4 cast an annoyed glance at her. "Back in basic training, whaddaya think? We was the top wrestlers in the place. Anyway, I just thought'd I'd talk to him for a sec, and he was real friendly, even asked what all we were doing down by the Artic base and everything." Numbuh 4 smirked as he looked over at Hienrich. "Cool guy, Numbuh 60. Got a lotta grit, knows how ta get things done. A real man, ya know?"

Hienrich, who seemed a little bored by the conversation, shrugged. "Vhatever."

Wally frowned, feeling that he was not getting a proper degree of respect from the boy. "How much longer before we get to your cruddy Candy Bar, anyway?" He asked. Straightening up, he hefted his pistol for emphasis.

Hienrich glared at him, but shifted on the seat a trifle uneasily. "Very soon. Your Kids Next Door motorboat goes very fast. We should be coming in sight any moment now."

* * *

"We should be picking them up annnny minute now!" 86 sneered into Numbuh One's implacable sunglasses. 

"Fanny!" 362 snapped at the girl.

"Oh, I highly doubt that." Numbuh 1 did not smile, but neither did he appear daunted. "By this time, 3 and 4 should be well into the staging area, which we were told was somehow stealthed against KND sensors. That is why we have never been able to locate Stickybeard's base." He tilted his head contemplatively. "And if they leave that area, they should be protected by the Cloaking device Numbuh 2 installed on the boat. He was working on it just before he left, you know."

362 glanced sharply at 1, then at 86. The redhead's mouth opened, closed, and her eyebrow twitched rather dangerously, but she said nothing.

"And Tommy has rather… unorthodox methods." Numbuh 1 pushed his glasses up on his nose in a completely unnessecary gesture. "If you could find him, I'm sure you already would have."

"NOW LISTEN HERE…!" 86 burst through the soldiers.

"86! Outside! Now!" 362 shot orders at the girl. "Take a squad to Numbuh 2's room and look for evidence of this cloaking device. Move it!"

86, for once in her life, almost disobeyed a direct order. "B.. But… You're not going to just let him…"

"NOW!" 362's eyes widened.

86 flinched and ducked back through the ranks, stopping only to throw a hasty salute at 362 and a venomous glare at 1.

* * *

Tommy shot up from under the water, jumped up on the shore, ducked behind a bush and rolled to safety. _Pretty good._ He smirked to himself. _The unjust seek the Tommy with all their unjust might, but their strength is as nothing before the awesome…"_

A sudden flare of the searchlights atop the buttressed tower suddenly drove the Tommy back under the bush.

The glaring lights swept back and forth across the beach, then returned to study the sea. Yellow goggles peaked out from under the shrubbery, and then, satisfied the danger was past, Tommy dashed across the shore. A quick splash into the moat, and there he sat for a moment, treading water. The lights swept past once more, and then he leapt out and clambered onto the bridge and through the gateway. He paused in the shadow of the wall for a moment before starting a dash across the courtyard.

Cape swirling behind him, small arms and legs pumping, The Tommy shot across the desolate patch of land separating the outer wall from the citadel. _The Tommy is an unseen hope. _He thought. _A whisper in the night, the dark flicker of a shadow in a forgotten corner. His enemies seek for him in vain, for he is little more than the night itself, in its silent cry for vengeance and just… YIKES!_

The Tommy threw himself on the ground and lay still, eyes keeping careful watch on the shadowy forms of guards on the wall.

Satisfied they were not looking at him, he crawled on his belly toward the gates. _The Tommy adapts readily to the unexpected._ He thought. _Though he was not told about the many watches of the unjust, he eludes them with all the elusion of justice itself._ He allowed himself a few delightfully eloquent sentences about how stupid Numbuh 1 was for not telling him about the guards before, then returned to normal. _Silent as a shadow, the Tommy approaches the gate of the unjust citadel._

'**The gate will be closed, and probably locked**.' He heard Nigel's voice in his ear as clearly as the day he had come to the house. '**Don't try to get in through there, but look around by the base. If it fits the standard design for their bases, it should have an alternative entrance. They call it a sally port, used to attack the enemy during sieges. It'll be locked, but you should be able to pick it with Numbuh 2's TOOTHPICK device.**'

Tommy wriggled up to the cold stone wall and jumped up. He felt pleased at locating the port so quickly. _Having found the secret entrance, the Tommy now puts his flawless skills to work to pick the lock._ He thought

All the same, he felt nervous as he maneuvered the tiny device into the keyhole. _Okay Nigel, you better be right…_

* * *

"Okay, Nigel." 362's eyes were no longer furious, but her voice lost none of its authority. "So you pulled one over on us. Congratulations." Stepping forward, she stared hard at him. "Now that you've had your fun, you need to tell us exactly where your agents are, call them, and recall them to base." 

"And why would I do that?" Numbuh 1 arched an eyebrow.

362 blinked for a moment, but her gaze did not waver. "I know we've made a mess of this whole thing, Nigel, but I tell you that we will get 2 and 5 back…"

"No, no." Nigel seemed a little disturbed by her answer. "Not that. I mean, when they come back, the only thing you'll do is probably court-martial and decommission the lot of us." He thought. "Maybe you'll throw us all in the Artic prison, but considering we broke someone out of there already, I rather doubt it."

"I would be right to do it." 362 tipped her chin up, still glaring at him. "You've disobeyed a clear directive and endangered a vital Kids Next Door undercover operation."

"Yes, you would." Nigel looked at her, a little puzzled. "I know. That's why I don't see why I should call back 3 and 4."

"Because they're in danger, and because as an operative of the Kids Next Door, it is your duty to recall them!" The commander ground out at him. Her voice was firm as stone, but her eyes were just starting to waver. "Please Nigel. We already have one crisis. Don't give us two to deal with."

"I'm trying to give you none at all." Nigel's sunglasses gave back her reflection. "You don't have to worry about my team. I trained them, they know how to handle themselves."

Something snapped in 362's face and she stared at him with a strange incredulity. "You fool." She whispered. "That's not what I'm worried about."

* * *

"That's not what I'm worried about, you idiot!" Numbuh 4 jumped up on the counter and shoved his pistol into the quivering bartender's face. "I KNOW they're not HERE, what I want to know is WHERE they are." 

"But I tell ye, I dinnae ken where they…"

"NOW, ya idiot!" 4's finger itched dangerously closer to the trigger.

"Butterbar." Heinrich spoke up from the door. "His name ist Butterbar."

"Whatever." 4 snorted, sparing just a glance away. "Now listen here, Butterball, you've got exactly ten seconds to tell me where those pirates have got to. I'm starting at one… twenty-three…"

"He also," came Heinrich's voice from the doorway, "has und assistant named Fingers"

Numbuh 4 looked up just in time to see an enormous fist coming towards him.

"Most of the pirates call him Butter's Fingers." Heinrich noted helpfully, as Numbuh 4 flew across the bar and crashed into three tables and thirteen chairs. "Und affectionate term, it vould seem."

Numbuh 4 growled as he got up off the floor, picking splinters out of his hair. "Thanks a lot."

'Fingers' stood at the far end, next to the counter, a massive, hulking giant. His flabby chin was covered with a stubbly orange beard, and a tattered blue tunic hung from his body. Two small beady eyes peered down at Numbuh 4.

Numbuh 4 got to his feet, swayed a little, and then steadied, fists at the ready.

The boards creaked under Fingers' heavy tread as he came forward. Somewhere behind him, Butterbar was squeaking out some pleas about 'not wrecking the place.'

A roaring filled the bar as the enormous thug descended on the boy.

Chairs splintered. Tables crashed. Orange blur dashed over blue ogre. Wood and metal rose and smashed in mad tumult as the two battled from one end of the bar to the other. Fingers' feet broke through the rough planking and splashed in the water just below. Wally flew backward and smashed into the wall, becoming hopelessly entangled in the narrow sticks of its frame. Back and forth the struggle raged, while just above could be heard the excited squeals of Numbuh Three and the terror-stricken exclamations of Butterbar.

In the interests of history, it is too bad that the fight did not last longer, as it might have been truly something to remember. Unfortunately, however, at this juncture, Heinrich, who seemed rather annoyed at the loss of time, grabbed Numbuh 3's weapon (which she had completely forgotten) and fired it at Fingers.

The teddy bear struck him dead in the chest. Fingers groaned once, doubled over, and crashed to the ground, smashing through ten chairs, two tables, and fourteen floorboards on his way.

Numbuh 4 dug his way out from under a smashed cabinet and looked once at the fallen giant. He glanced over at the other two. "Thanks, Numbuh 3."

"Huh?" Numbuh 3 looked down at the gun that was suddenly back in her hands before being elbowed into silence by Heinrich. "Oh! Right! You're welcome, Numbuh 4!"

"Enof of dat." Heinrich snorted, pushing his way up to the counter. "You! Butterbar!"

Two elderly eyes under a sprouting mass of gray hair peeped over the counter.

"Yes, you." Heinrich nodded. "Get out from behind dere."

The blubbering bartender crawled out from behind the table. "Ah, please ye kind sirs, take mae money and go, but dinnae harm me no more…"

"Silence, old vun!" Heinrich barked. "Ve haf no interest in your life!"

"Hey!" Numbuh 4 elbowed Heinrich aside. "I'll handle this, thank you very much! Now look here," He said, turning to the bartender. "We don't really care about you, we're after those pirates who were here. Just point us in the direction where they went, and we'll be on our way with no trouble."

* * *

"Listen, Numbuh 1." 362 was speaking slowly, in a slow, controlled tone. "Obviously we don't want to go through more trouble than we have to. The matter isn't official, I can tell you neither you, nor your team, will be court-martialed or decommissioned. Just recall them, and I promise you, there'll be no more trouble in this matter." 

"Give my team five more minutes." Numbuh 1 responded, eyes steady, unreadable. "And there'll be no more matter to have trouble with."

"You don't know that." She glared. "We've already lost one team to this problem, Nigel. One of our best. What makes you think your operatives can do better?"

"I trust my team." Nigel arched an eyebrow. "I know what they can do. And I know that they know their friends. Numbuh 20,000 is capable, but he didn't know 5 or Stickybeard very well. My men know both." He looked at her. "Your plan was good, but it didn't take the people into account. This should take care of things quite well."

Rachel blinked once, twice. "Nigel, _please_." She whispered. "_Now_."

* * *

_Now. Now! NOW_! Tommy put on a sudden dash of speed and shot across the dark hallway, just as the two guards turned. He flattened himself against the wall and held his breath, listening in tense silence. 

The steps continued, quiet, steady, unhurried. He allowed himself a small breath of relief.

_The Tommy has entered deep within the fortress._ He thought to himself. The _steps of injustice, they draw ever…. Hokey smokes, why on earth did I ever agree to do this!?_

He stopped the thought before it could go any farther. The sound of the shoes was growing louder, clearer. He heard the slight squeak of leather on the stone floor…

"_Oye! Francis_!" The sudden shout made Tommy jump, but he quickly calmed himself. It had come from the other guard further down the hallway.

The shoes stopped, then squeaked as they turned. "_Que, mi amigo_?"

"_Sabe el barca grande del cielo ayer? Que esa?"_

Shoes laughed. "_Oh, si! Es una arma nueva por la guerra con los Mores. Padre _Hoagie_ hace este_."

Hoagie! The word leapt out of the meaningless gibberish, striking Tommy upon the ears. He jumped to his feet and leaned to the corner, desperately listening for more.

"_Si? Yo pienso…"_

"_Oh, si, es una arma grande. Padre _Hoagie _esta un soldado del cielo_."

Aha! Tommy grinned. He didn't get the whole thing, but he'd heard the last word clearly. "Cielo." That one was easy, at least. The ceiling. Hoagie must be…

No wait. That didn't make sense. Hoagie couldn't be on the ceiling. Tommy stopped and frowned. This was hard.

"_Es interestante_." Came the voice down the hall. "_Muchas Gracias por informada, Francis._"

"_De nada, Salvador_." Chuckled Shoes. "_Buenas Noches_."

"_Y usted tambien_." The other guard replied, his voice already fading into the darkness. Shoes seemed to have forgotten his position, his steps came no farther, but began to walk back the hallway, away from Tommy.

_'Del cielo_.' Tommy thought. It must mean the ceiling, the top, the utmost floor. The top floor! Of course! They must be holding Hoagie in a dungeon at the very top of the castle!

Filled with new purpose, the Tommy dashed into the dark hallway. The Tommy would fulfill his mission.

* * *

"My team will fulfill the mission." Nigel Uno stated. His chin was up and his glasses implacable. "They will. Just give them a few more minutes, and you'll have no problem. You don't have to record this on the files, you can say 20,000 pulled them out." His glasses slipped for just a moment and he pushed them back up. "I'm trying to help you, Rachel. Why won't you let me?" 

"Because it's not that simple." 362 closed her eyes. "You fool, don't you see what the real problem is here?"

* * *

"It looks scary." Numbuh 3 whispered, eyes wide at the enormous black hull looming against the darkness. 

"_Behurigan_… Quiet!" Heinrich hissed. "It is a vonder ve haf gotten zis far wifout being noticed. Now silence!"

Numbuh 4 cast a quick look back. "'E's right, Numbuh 3." He whispered. "Ya gotta…"

"Zilence!" Heinrich shot a glance back at them.

Numbuh 4 glared at him. _I shoulda left him chained to the motor_. He thought.

"You two vill haf to be more quiet." The german boy hissed. "Clearly, you do not understand the dangers of zis."

* * *

"You're a good commander, Nigel, but you don't understand the dangers of undercover work." 362 rubbed her forehead as if nursing a sore. "You've only done one real covert ops mission, and that wasn't a real undercover operation… really a charade more than anything else. You danced around with the enemy and fooled them for a day, no more."

* * *

Tommy dashed around the corner. _The Tommy has fooled that sentry back there_. He thought. _Now, while he's gone, The Tommy will just pick the lock on this door, and then he'll be on the top of the tower!_

Hoagie's device worked wonderfully well. The door sprung open. Like a phantom, Tommy shot through and shut it behind him, locking it behind him. _That sentry won't know what happened!_ He grinned smugly. _Now, for…_

_Hokey smokes._

A huge black bulk hovered above the stone tower, a black whale against the blue ocean of the night sky. A few frail cords linked it to the roof, and the scattered lanterns guttering in the wind threw light against its wooden undercarriage, revealing strange and dangerous-looking weapons. The dull crash of the waves far down below was drowned out by a new sound, a whirring rasp of many thousand of propellers.

The Tommy gulped. _This is a lot different than the Tommy was expecting_.

* * *

"Real undercover work—spending weeks, maybe months, in a secret life—is a lot different than what you'd think." Rachel paced back and forth in the control room, between Nigel and her forces. "It's more tedious, sure, and there are more chances that you'll slip up, but there's something else, something you wouldn't think of until you meet it, until you come up against it yourself." 

Nigel raised an eyebrow. Rachel noticed and shot him an annoyed look. "I wasn't always in this job, you know. I used to be a black ops agent."

* * *

"I vasn't alvays a prisoner in the Artic base," Heinrich spoke in an angry whisper. "I vas once a vorld-famous treasure hunter. The line will hold." 

Numbuh 4 cast another anxious glance up. It looked a long distance from the tiny dingy to the railing high above on the dark wall. The rope, thrown up to the deck, swayed and knocked gently against the side.

Unable to look any longer, he turned his head down. He nodded. "Ok." He muttered. "3" He pointed. "After me. If it goes wrong, you get back down."

"But I…" Numbuh 3 looked from the line to 4 and back again.

"Kooks." Numbuh 4 stopped her. "ya gotta." He pointed at the german boy, who they had now lashed to the motor. "Heinie, she comes down, you get out of here. Fast."

Heinrich nodded curtly. "Ja."

Numbuh 4 drew a last deep breath. If he stayed any longer, he wouldn't be able to do it. "Okay." He whispered. "Let's go."

He hopped off the boat and grabbed onto the line, using it to climb up as he walked up the outside.

* * *

"Understand, I'm not talking about an outside danger." Rachel stopped pacing and gestured impatiently with her hand. "This is the sort of danger that comes more from yourself, more than anything outside."

* * *

_So_ _I can't depend on outside help here._ Tommy thought. _I need to work this out myself._ _If_ _I grabbed onto the line, I could maybe climb up to the deck and… nah. I'm not that stupid._

He cast an anxious look around. Now what to do? Hoagie didn't seem to be up here, and Nigel had said nothing about gigantic flying creatures.

Well, he reasoned, Kids Next Door would want some info on this new… thing, whatever it was. Maybe he could find out some stuff quick before he left.

A quick look around showed him some scaffolding erected on the far side. Maybe he could climb up that. With a whip of his cape, he disappeared into the darkness.

* * *

"Veterans of the service call it 'disappearing into your work'" Rachel smiled, a little sadly. "It's a somewhat humorous term." 

She pressed her fingers together. "Understand, Nigel, when you work for weeks undercover, you need to make sure your story is consistent. You need to make sure every fact hangs together and that you react how you're supposed to in every situation, even unexpected ones. In essence, you need to create a whole new persona for yourself."

"Good spies can do this naturally, even make the new persona so near themselves that they can slip in and out quite easily." A frown pained her mouth a moment, and then stiffened into a commanderly line. "But that's the problem."

* * *

Numbuh 4 hopped up on the deck and crouched low. His mustard pistol swept left, then right. 

Nothing.

He tapped his fingers against the railing twice. Kuki came clambering over, gasping to the wooden deck. "Oh yay! I was wondering when…"

"Shhh!" Numbuh 4 silenced her. "We need to find the lower decks. Come on."

The two darted over to the steps, staying as low and quiet as possible. Numbuh 4 peeked down the hatch, then turned back. "Okay, I'm going down there. You keep watch, okay?"

"But Wally.."

"C'mon, Kooks." Numbuh 4 gave a little smile. "We do this all the time. It's like a second nature or something."

* * *

"That second nature is a problem. When you have to be a person, another person, for weeks at a time," 362 began to pace again, "you have to constantly be pretending to be that person, feeling what they would feel, doing what they would do. And if it's almost a second nature, doing it for long enough begins to make it a first nature." 

She stopped, wheeled, and faced Nigel. "If you become a new person, with a new life, in a new world, with new friends, sometimes, Nigel, the new world feels better than the old. It becomes more you than then your first was. After all, who hasn't wanted the chance to restart their life, without any of the memories?"

* * *

Tommy stood on the deck, breathing hard. It looks quiet enough. He thought. Let's see what's all around. 

A quick jog across the deck, and he was at the steps. A quick run down, and he was amidst the workings. He could see there were thousands of tiny wheels around him, but what they were doing and what drove them, he could not see.

A jump down to the next level. Gears and wheels, turning grinding. Doubtless driving the rotors above. Tommy knew enough of 2x4 technology to get that.

Now another jump. This section seemed much more unstable, boards were lying around, hammers, saws, and nails were scattered with an air of obvious disarray. Guns and weaponry, obviously new, were bolted onto makeshift carriages, poking out of new-cut holes in the underside.

Tommy gazed about with childish interest. _I wonder if Nigel knows about all this._ He thought. _This is the sort of thing he and his friends wouldn't know anything about._

* * *

"My operatives wouldn't do anything like that!" Nigel jumped to his feet, eyes narrowed. "And if you thought they would, why'd you send them in? 

"We didn't think the mission would take so long." Rachel replied, steady as ever. "And we thought Numbuh 5 had sufficient experience to keep her and Numbuh 2 on track."

"Hmmph." Nigel adjusted his glasses. "And what makes you think differently now? Numbuhs 2 and 5 would sooner die than betray the KND! They're true and loyal, they'd never turn against us!"

"Nigel, Nigel." Rachel shook her head, eyes inexpressibly sad. "Are you so blind to the things right in front of you?"

* * *

Numbuh 3 was almost dozing off when Numbuh 4 came exploding out of the hold. 

"Go! Go!" he yelled, giving her a rough shove. "It's a trap, it's a trap! Run for it, Kooks!" He fired at a pirate face that popped out of the hold. "Get back to Numbuh 1, tell him we were wrong! Tell him… Oh, just get out of here!"

"But I… what…" Kuki stammered, she was still just waking up, and beginning to realize the deck was filling with pirates.

She felt a sharp tug on her turtleneck, and suddenly her face was yanked around to within inches of Wally's. "You need to get out of here, and you need to get out NOW!" he hissed. "Now get DOWN there!"

He did not wait for a reply, but half-dragged her to the side, still firing at the rushing buccaneers flooding the decks, and shoved her against the railing. "GO!" He yelled, turning to face the pirates.

Stammering, sobbing, still completely unable to understand even what she was doing, Kuki clambered over the side and began to descend.

* * *

Tommy was just turning to leave when he bumped against one of the guns. 

The cannon exploded into life. The sound rebounded against the walls and thundered upon the ceiling. It echoed up and down the staircase, and Tommy heard, or fancied he heard, the sudden sound of squeaking footsteps.

He dashed up the stairs to the deck in a moment. A light was on in the cabin, but he paid it no heed. Over the side he hurried, clambering down the scaffolding at breakneck speed. He felt the stone floor rise up to meet him as he landed.

Soldiers were coming out of the door. One of them gave a shout and pointed at him.

_Rats!_

Tommy did not even stop to thing what he was doing, he simply dashed away from the door, away from the ship. A light, kite-like contraption was sitting near the edge of the roof, facing out to the wild, open sea. He did not stop to think where it came from or where it came from, but, as quick as thought, grasped it with both hands and tossed it onto his back. With a wild yell, he jumped out into the night air.

* * *

"You of all people should know the danger." Rachel looked at him with almost an air of disappointment, or possibly sorrow. "You were there at the POOL incident."

* * *

Numbuh 4 shot right. He shot left. Stickybeard came at him and he dodged down and gave a quick jab in his general direction. Paying no attention to the thud and following curse, he whirled around and threw a fist into the face of a tiny red squirt who was coming at him, kicking out at the small blue squirt who was right behind him.

_Get outta here, Kuki..._

* * *

"The POOL incident?" Nigel's glasses slipped, showing nothing but confusion. "What does that have to do with this?"

* * *

Tommy felt the wind tug at his cheeks, twisting them into a smile. The breeze soared up, caught under his wings, stopped his fall. Slowly, easily, his kite tilted to meet the wind…

* * *

"Isn't it obvious?" Rachel looked at him, paying no heed to 86's sudden entry. "That was a negative world, Nigel, exactly opposite our own. Whatever they were, you were not."

"Yes." Nigel nodded, but his face was still confused.

"And whatever they were not, you are."

* * *

Shoot right. Shoot left. Duck. Bob. Weave. Stickybeard again. Knock out his leg. Fire at that stupid looking pirate. Pray Kuki's down to the boat. Shoot right… 

"That's enough of dat, baby."

* * *

"When you entered that world, you met a KND as evil as you were good. With your help however, you showed them how they were evil and turned them to the side of right." 

Puzzlement, and then slow comprehension, grew across Nigel's face.

* * *

The wind caught him, it held him, it was pulling him out to sea, to freedom… 

And suddenly something caught hold and would not let go.

* * *

"The mirror works both ways, Nigel. You were good, and they were evil. But Command has long realized an inherent danger. Even as the negatives had the potential to turn good, so the positives had the potential to turn bad."

* * *

Slowly, deliberately, Wally turned toward the voice, and toward the candy pistol that the owner of the voice held. 

Long leather boots were on her feet. A sloppy, ragged blue tunic hung from her skinny frame, and a sturdy black belt girt about her waist, into which a sharp candy cane cutlass was thrust. Her raven-black hair was bound up in a tight ponytail, and covered by a blood-red bandanna.

And her eyes were bold and laughing as they gazed at him.

"You can't beat me, baby." Said Abigail Lincoln. "You know you can't."

Numbuh 4 drew a long breath. "Mebbe not." He admitted. "But I'm sure gonna try. And anyway, it'll get Numbuh 3 back to Numbuh 1 quicker."

A sudden change flickered across Abby's face, and then she smiled again. "I wouldn't count on dat, baby."

* * *

Against the wind's pull, against the tug of gravity, against the very straining of his tiny feet, Tommy tumbled back to the stone roof. The fragile wood frame cracked as it hit the cobblestones, the fabric tore. 

Sobbing, whimpering, drawing out great heaving breaths, Tommy turned his head up to look at his captor.

Simple hemp sandals were on his feet, just poking out from a long green robe that covered him from head to toe. A celery stalk was thrust in one side of his cord belt, a pistol in the other. His orange-red hair was disordered and tousled as if startled from sleep, and covered only by a pair of sadly familiar yellow goggles.

And his eyes were troubled and shocked as they gazed at him.

"Tommy!?" Hoagie Gilligan asked, paying no heed as the guards ran up on either side. "What are you… What were you thinking? That model wasn't finished, if it hadn't been still tied to the roof, you might've…" he stopped and ran a hand through his hair. "What're you doing here?"

Tommy had only strength for one word. "H—H—Hoagie?"

* * *

Numbuh 4 watched, dumbfounded, unbelieving, as a pair of green sleeves came up over the railing. He gazed bewildered, shocked beyond all words, as they were followed by a frightened white face and a waving length of black hair. And as Numbuh 3 came hesitantly, timidly forward to him, he could do no more than shake his head, trying and miserably failing to ask why. 

She came close to him, casting fearful glances around at the pirates, trying to huddle into a little ball, pressing into him for comfort.

And Abby, turning from the two, raised her eyebrows at the figure clambering over the railing. "Been a while since we seen you on the _Sweet Revenge_, baby. You sure you wanna come aboard? I'm first mate, ya know."

Heinrich Von Marzipan shrugged as he holstered a mustard pistol. "I bear no grudge."

* * *

**TO BE CONTINUED...**

DunDundun! Oh come on, you didn't honestly think Heinie was on the level, did you? At the very least, if you'd seen CARAMEL, you should have known he was going to turn evil at some point. Though it was kinda fun to think how he'd interact with 3 and 4, and the part with Fingers was pretty neat.

Tommy is the most impossible character to write for. Fun, but impossible. I had no idea what he was going to do in the castle, kinda played it by ear. Don't ask me why the Spinach Inquisition has searchlights, they just do.

Yes, I've updated. If any of you look out the windows and see pigs flying, I shall not in the least be surprised.

I must apologize for this. I've gotten back to college, and life has been crazy recently, and I just kinda forgot. I'll try to do this every week, but every other is much more likely. But what the hey. I will do my best, and I **will** finish this. Someday. I'd swear to that, but I don't swear.

Next Chapter. Nigel, broken by the news he has sent his whole team to their doom, agrees to anything. As the forces of the Moores and the Spinachians prepare for battle, Command makes the decision to abandon Operation SEPARATION.


	15. Cutting Losses

**Cutting Losses**

Kuki Sanban, Numbuh 3 of the Kids Next Door, had never really liked the dark. Or at least, not unless she had her Sleepy-Night Rainbow Monkey along with her, and was wearing her Sweet Dreams Rainbow Monkey jammies. Then it was okay. But just plain dark, and worse, cold, wet dark that smelt of mold and barnacles and several kinds of stale odors, that she did not like.

She really wished Wally would say something. It had been some hours now since the pirates dragged them down here to the hold and left them tied to the center beam, and still he had said nothing. He was just sitting there, back to the pole, slumped over in the middle as if he had no strength to sit up straight. If it hadn't been for the ropes, he probably would've fallen onto the floor. He looked asleep.

Somehow, that was an even more disturbing thought. "Wally." She whispered. "Wally? Are you awake? I'm scared."

The groan from the other side of the beam was faint, unearthly, and a little angry. But it was wonderfully reassuring.

"When I get my paws on that jerk Heine, I'm gonna…" There was a little pause and something of a gulp. "Ah, fergit it. But he's gonna pay. One way or another. That cruddy idiot. He's no boy. We coulda gotten away if he hadn't been such a…" His voice faded off again.

"How'd you know it was a trap?" Kuki twisted in her ropes, trying to see the other side of the beam.

"Huh?"

"When you came out, silly. You came running saying it was a trap. How'd you know?" Kuki was desperate to keep Wally talking. She didn't want the darkness to come back.

"Oh…" The voice sounded tired, uninterested. "I found the jail. 20,000 and his men were there. They told me to clear out and bring reinforcements."

"Oh." Kuki thought. "Okay. Did they say anything about Numbuh 5?"

A snort echoed off the wooden walls of the ship. "Just that she was the one who jumped on them and captured 20,000. And that she told the pirates where their communicators were, so they couldn't contact Moon Base. Nothin' much."

Kuki blinked at the darkness. "Wait. Numbuh 5? But she's supposed to be on our side! I thought…"

"Aw, fer crud's sake, are you only getting that now?" There was a little creaking noise as Wally twisted in his ropes. "We were wrong. Numbuh 1 was wrong. Numbuh 5 didn't need rescuing. She's perfectly at home here.

* * *

Abigail Lincoln had never liked meetings. They took forever and talked over things that everybody already knew. She could bear through them as long as she could learn something, or if she could whisper catcalls while Numbuh 1 droned on…

Well. She didn't like meetings. But this one wasn't bad. At least she got to relax and lean back on the bunk while Stickybeard, Heinrich, and Long John leaned over the map on the table. And for some reason, it was a lot better than sitting in her hammock trying to ignore the effects of last night.

That had been one wiiiild party.

She had drunk way too much coffee. She knew that. Probably she should have restrained herself, but it had been soooo long since she tasted it, and it only lasted for so long. She had even tried a drop of that green stuff. Hoo baby! That stuff had a _kick_ to it! She'd offered Long John a taste, but he didn't want any, and the other pirates had just watched in awe as she downed the stuff. It had paid off though. When they had heard the commotion on deck…

Abby winced momentarily. She got up from the bed and began to hobble over to the table. "Hey, Sticky, can I have a swig of that mocha there?"

Stickybeard glanced up and pushed the steaming mug in her direction. "Help yerself, lassie. Ye looks like you could use it."

Long John looked over at her too. "Are you okay, missus? You look terrible."

"Ja, that she does." Heinrich nodded.

"Ah, it's the coffee." Abby shrugged it off. She threw her head back and gulped it down. Setting the mug back, she wiped her mouth clean. "It always happens once it wears off. A little more, and I'll be fine."

"By the powders, lassie." Stickybeard chuckled, "but it's a wonder how ye can keep the stuff down."

"Ya just need to get used to it, baby." Abby winked at him. "Now, what was we talking about again?"

Stickybeard chuckled and bent over the map again. "Well, lassie, we be heading for the Sugar Sands to pick up some friends of ours. They be needing some help for some enemies, and we owes them a favor or two. But first we be needin' to pick up…" And Stickybeard's voice began to rise and wall in a wave of monotone, a wave that she could drown her worries and fears in.

_It ain't nothin' to worry about anyway_. She thought, absentmindly fingering her necklace. _This sort of thing won't cause too much trouble._

* * *

Contrary to what one might think, Rachel Mackenzie, Numbuh 362 of the Kids Next Door, did not like rules. Or meetings. And meetings about rules, well… forget it. But they were important, and this one at least was dangerously crucial. She couldn't remember the last time she, 86, 60, 65.3, and 1 had all been in the same meeting about the same thing.

"The operation wasn't official, so no official action can be taken." 60 reminded 86. "That seems pretty clear to me."

"Aye, but the breakout was, so that can." 86 snarled. "And anyway, something needs to happen to this BOY fer screwing up like this."

"I don't see how your office handled it much better." 60 shot back. "According to your files, you hadn't even gotten a plan together yet to get 5 and 2 out of there."

"Of COURSE not!" Fanny screamed. "It's a secret operation! Do you think I'd put my plans down in the files?"

"I think you…"

"I asked 86 not to attempt a rescue until we knew more about it." 362 sighed. "It's dangerous to go in without any intel on a situation."

She just wished Numbuh 1 would say something. Ever since they had finally convinced him to contact his people, ever since they'd confirmed that the communicators were dead, Nigel hadn't said a word. Not in the treehouse, not in the whole long ride back to Moon Base, not in the holding cell where they'd kept him until they figured out they needed his help, and now not even in the meeting about the rescue of his team. If he would just say _something_, it would be mean he was at least listening!

"Anyway, this sort of thing just can't be blown off." 86 was still steaming. "Some kinda action has to be taken. This boy's gonna pay for it!"

"She has a point." Numbuh 65.3 spoke up. "Section 78.6, line 3.14 of the Kids Next Door Rulebook states clearly direct insubordination must be accompanied by a disciplinary action, regardless of the defendant's rank or status, unless the officer implicated chooses to overlook it."

"Exactly!" 86 turned triumphantly. "Now, you see…"

"Aren't we getting a little off-track?" 60 cut in. "I thought we were going to talk about how we're getting one sector and two operatives out of a danger zone, not about who we're going to blame for the whole mess."

"Numbuh 60 is correct." 362 nodded before Fanny could reply. "We're here to talk policy, not punishment. We have a bit more information now, because 88 called back in, and Numbuh 1 handed in the transcripts of his teams movements." Fanny growled, but 362 silenced her with a wave. "So. We know who we're fighting, and we know where they are. Now. Any ideas?" She glanced over. "What about you, Numbuh 1?"

Numbuh 1 lifted up his head, looked at her almost listlessly. "Yes, sir. Sounds good." His head flopped back down to the desk.

* * *

"Sure, sure." Hoagie nodded, somewhat distracted. "Sounds great"

Hoagie had recently decided he hated meetings. This was strange, because usually, he loved them. They made him feel big and important, like he had a role in what was going on. But when the meeting was mostly about a battle, and partly about an invention, and his whole mind was screaming questions about something entirely different, well...

He wished Father Spinachoza would just hurry it up and finish the meeting. He simply HAD to talk to Tommy. What on earth was he doing here? Why had he come? And just what should Hoagie do with him now? The whole question was incredibly agonizing.

"Our fleet in the Mediterranean has reported a large degree of pirate activity in that area." He heard the voice drone. "They have suddenly slackened, and yesterday a merchantman came into port with reports of being robbed. It seems fairly certain they are headed for the Straits of Gibralter."

"The Moores allies we fear, yes?" Vespinachuci asked.

"Most likely." Spinachoza nodded. "It wouldn't take much to get them to…"

Why? It made no sense! Tommy was the Tommy now, he was supposed to work alone, he wasn't supposed to keep following Hoagie around! Especially while he was on a special undercover…"

Hoagie stopped and frowned. He _was_ undercover, wasn't he. Goodness, he'd just about forgotten about that. But how had Tommy found him then? His family thought he was at some flight camp or something like that. How could Tommy have…

"Brother Hoagie? Do you agree?"

Hoagie glanced up. "Sure, sure." He nodded again. "Good idea."

Father Spinachoza eyes looked skeptically at him. "You seem a trifle distracted, brother Hoagie."

"I am well, Holy Father." Hoagie dragged his mouth into a smile. "I am meditating as to the nature of the battle."

"I hear you capture intruder last night." Vespinachuci spoke up. "What is to be done with him, may I ask?"

"Oh yes." Spinachoza frowned in thought. "I should assign one of our brethren to question him and inquire as to what he thought to gain. He is not a Moore, nor a pirate, but it is possible he is in league with them."

"I have anticipated you in this matter, Holy Father." Hoagie spoke up. "I have already asked a member of the brethren to speak with the prisoner this afternoon."

He had already decided that whatever else was going on, he needed to talk with Tommy. _Something_ weird was going on.

* * *

"…So we meet up with Ahl Shugar and his boys over by here, and then we just need to carry them across the Straits." Stickybeard stood up above the map and grinned at all present. "Arr, but tis' an easy job, for as much as he be paying us. I hear the Sugar Sands has gems the size of eggs, they do!"

Abby frowned. "Careful, Sticky. The Moores have wealth, yeah, but they're tricky folks. Ya need to watch em' or they'll turn on ya."

"Ja, is so." Heinrich nodded. "They vill make deal, but vill they keep to it? That ist und other question."

"We'll keep an eye on them." Stickybeard waved the concerns off. "But I don't think they're gonna be thinking about that too much, hahar. They gots a lot staked on this operation."

"Will we have enough people to…" Abby raised an eyebrow.

"We'll have plenty." Another wave. "Don't worry yerself about that. Now, ye best be all getting to yer quarters. We got a big day on the morrow, and ye should all be rested up for it!" The captain thumped on the table heartily to emphasize his point. "Now, avast ye!"

The ship's officers filed out of the cabin into the night air, salt breeze stinging their cheeks. Stickybeard mumbled a few words to Heinrich about "good to have ya back aboard," and turned back to his cabin.

Abby was just descending the steps to the deck when she felt a meaty hand on her shoulder. Turning, she met the troubled expression of Long John Stupid.

"Miss, kin I speak with ye for a moment?" He asked.

Abby felt a little worried, but gave a shrug anyway. "Sure, baby, shoot." She had a vague idea of what he was going to say. John had been acting strange ever since the coffee raid, and she felt that the idea of the Pearly Whites was weighing on his mind.

"Miss, it's about the captain." John played around with his fingers a minute.

_Oh boy, here it comes. Abby don't know how she's gonna…_

"See, the captain came to me this morning, y'see, and he asked me to plot a map fer a ship being sent to the Candiribean." He looked at her anxiously to see if she followed him so far. "I did it, and I came jest before the meetin' started to give him it."

"Okay." Abby was puzzled. So what?

"Well, when I came in, he wuz writing a letter, y'see, like with letters and all. Now I can't write miss, (me brother never taught me), but I knows how to read them letters, and he was writing a letter about somethin' being gotten, and how he needed somethin' else now."

"Huh." A quick glance off to midships told Abby there was no one else. She hoped John would finish it up soon, this seemed immensely boring.

"Well, I didn't think much about it right then, miss, but he got to talking just now about how we ain't goin' to the Candiribian, we're goin' to the Straits, and it got me wonderin, and then I remembered what I heard last night."

"Oh, last night?" Abby shifted uncomfortably. She had almost forgotten about that.

"Yeah, when I was swabbing the decks (cleaning them, miss), and I was jest cleaning all the coffee stains by the captain's cabin, when I heard a couple voices."

"Really?" Now she was listening. That she **had** forgotten about.

"Yes miss!" Long John nodded enthusiastically. "And they were the same ones as before! Ye remember the ones that…"

"Yeah, yeah, that said they wanted Heinie to find the Pearly Whites." Abby waved him to silence. "Abby remembers. "The same voices? You sure? What'd they say?"

"That was the funny thing." Long John frowned. "The one voice, y'know, the gravelly one, wuz talking about how he'd help out the captain, but only if he had 'the goods' wid him. He never said what 'the goods' was."

"Huh." Abby frowned. "Yeah, that's funny, shor 'nuff. When was this, Long John?"

The big pirate shrugged. "I dunno. Last night, after all the fracas with the two kids up on deck."

"Oh yeah." Abby frowned. Another unpleasant reminder. That was something else she needed to take care of.

* * *

"So. Just one more thing to take care of." 362 frowned across the table, with her best meditative look. "What are we to do now?"

There was a moment's silence. Fanny and Patton glared at each other, 65.3 looked down and twiddled his thumbs, and Nigel just sat there, head still hung over limply.

"Any thoughts?" 362 looked about. She decided to give it another shot. "Numbuh 1, any ideas?"

The head came up. The eyes stared at her, sunglasses slipped from their defensive stance. "Whatever you think is best, supreme leader sir."

"I think we oughta just run in there, blow the ships, grab the operatives, and cut out." Fanny turned to 362. "It'll take me a little more than twenty minutes, tops."

"Too obvious." 65.3 spoke up, not looking up from his fingers. "That'd have to be official. We can't take overt action."

"And it would advise both groups to our interest." 60 pointed out. "The whole point of Operation: SEPARATION was to get them to battle each other. Once they know we're still in the fight, they'd join up and smack us down."

"Whadda we gonna do, then?" Fanny sneered. "Undercover stuff? That's worked reaaal well so far, hasn't it?"

There was just the smallest movement from Numbuh 1, like the tensing of a dog that is about to be kicked.

"If we could just pull them out of there, we'd be fine." 65.3 raised his head and pointed to the glowing map. "Reports indicate both forces are headed for a direct confrontation. We don't have much more to do."

"But that is the problem." 362 gave a wry little smile. "Pulling them out."

86 snorted. "Only two were actually KND operatives and they were disobeying orders anyway. Let 'em stay."

"You're forgetting Numbuh 20,000 and his team." 60 glared at her.

"And theoretically 2 and 5 are still active KND operatives." 362 grinned shamefacedly. "Not to mention Tommy is a Kid in distress, so as an organization we are bound to help him."

"THAT we could do a pretty overt strike for." 65.3 mused. "But we'd have to be sure he'd keep his mouth shut."

"Yeah right." Fanny snorted.

362 sighed. "A pretty little problem, it seems. Well, if we could somehow pull off an exact surgical strike with assurance it wouldn't go awry, I think we could…" She stopped suddenly.

The others looked at her. Even Numbuh 1 glanced up. There was a strange look in her eyes, and she seemed to be listening to something else.

"Operatives." She said, in a somewhat hasty and detached tone. "Might I ask you to leave the room for a moment? Something unexpected has just come up."

"Wuh-Wha…?" Numbuh 1 watched, absolutely bewildered, as the other three nodded and got to their feet, almost as if they were used to this. Numbuh 86 looked decidedly nervous. "What… I don't…"

60's firm hand gripped him by the shoulder and pulled him roughly to his feet. "C'mon, Nigel." He said, with a stiff grin. "Let the lady have her girl time."

* * *

"So that's the only problem. I just need a little down time, that's all." Hoagie grinned reassuringly at the tall priest.

Father Spinachoza frowned worriedly at him. "Very well, brother Hoagie. If you say so. Still, I must advise you to get rest as soon as possible. There is every reason to expect we will sail on the morrow, if these messages about the Barbary pirates turn true."

"Yeah, yeah." Hoagie nodded. "I'll do that. But first I just need to take a quick look at some things that need fixing."

"As you say." Spinachoza's frown did not leave his face. "Good night, brother."

"Good night, holy Father."

Hoagie turned and trotted off down the dark hallway, nearly running into Amerigo Vespinachuci, who halted and looked at him in surprise. "Que, mi amigo, and where are you running off to?"

"Uh…" Hoagie stopped and rubbed the back of his head. _Why on earth are there so many stupid people in these stupid hallways!_ "Nowhere particularly. I need to visit a repentant in the dungeon."

"Ah!" Vespinachuci's face cleared. "Then perhaps I keep you company, yes? I am going in much the same direction. I go to the docks, to give orders for our ships to ready for the morrow. Will you walk with me?"

"Uhh…" Hoagie gave a nervous shrug. "Sure! Sounds great!"

The two turned and walked down the hallway in silence, footsteps echoing against the dark stone walls. Vespinachuci seemed to be sunk deep in thought, contemplating plans for the battle. Hoagie, on the other hand, kept glancing to his companion, as if expecting some question or some other interruption. Once or twice he took a small green bottle out of his cloak and tasted it, but he always grimaced and replaced it immediately.

After some time, he could stand it no longer, and burst out, "Captain Vespinachuci, I have a question."

Startled from his thoughts, Amerigo looked down at him. A small smile curved his mouth. "Brother Hoagie, you are full of questions."

"Heh." Hoagie grinned. "Uh, man of science, right? I'm sorry, I know I keep bothering you."

"It is no trouble." Amerigo chuckled. "In the Spinach Inquisition, we are happy to answer any questions. We have nothing to hide."

"Okay." Hoagie struggled with his mouth for a minute, started once or twice, and then finally came out with the words. "What do you think you should do with a… well, hypothetically, with a… say, a brother… who misbehaved or something?"

He looked up. The captain did not seem inclined to answer immediately, so he continued, encouraged. "Y'know, in the family, not the monastery, like… say a little brother or something like that."

The captain's smooth, even tread continued on in silence for a while, and Hoagie, unsure of what to say, but still anxious for an answer, watched him nervously. His feet kept trotting, and his face, turned just slightly to the wall, seemed curiously blank.

Finally he answered, and his answer was another question. "Why do you ask me such a thing?"

Hoagie's eyes grew rather wide. "Well, uh… I… No particular reason, I… I mean, it's just a hypothetical question I'm considering for my… for my… my theological treatise. I just, uh… It's just a question." He finished lamely.

"You have no design with this question, you are certain?" Vespinachuci stopped and turned on him suddenly, eyes flashing. "You do not intend anything upon me?"

"I… Uh…" Hoagie's feet stumbled over each other as he backed up against the wall. "No, not at all!" His eyes flew left and right. "I… I just…" He faced front and gulped. "My brother is misbehaving and I need to know how to deal with it, okay!? That's all!"

Vespinachuci stopped. A shade seemed to pass from his face, and it loosened. "Your brother?"

"Yeah." Hoagie nodded. "He's… he's just misbehaving and I just… well, I don't know what to do."

Vespinachuci whirled, and, without a word, strode down into the dark hallway. Hoagie, sensing there was more to be said, hurried after him, bare fat feet pounding the pavement.

"You won't tell anybody, will you?" He asked. "I mean, I don't really want… uh… I don't want anybody… uh… to know… that I'm having problems with him, and I'm not sure whether to tell him to behave or…"

"I" Vespinachuci's voice bounced off the stone walls. "should be happy merely to have a brother."

Hoagie stared at him, too dumbfounded to form questions with his lips.

"You remember I speak of family, yes?" Hoagie nodded, although it made no difference, Vespinachuci still faced the wall. "We own inn on the border of Spinachia, between the Moores and the Spinach Inquisition. My father, he dead already…"

"Yeah." It was completely unnecessary for Hoagie to reply, but he did so anyway. "In a sea battle off of Broccolitian."

"Windstorm, my friend." A sad smile curved the edge of what Hoagie could see of the captain's face. "He was lieutenant in Spinachian Armada, drafted to help with war. He die, my mother no longer like the Spin-ach, so she move to borderlands to operate inn. You see?"

"Yeah." Hoagie nodded, still unnecessarily.

"Well." A sigh. "So, my father dead. I need to help _mi madre_ with the looking after of my family. Help with me little sister, the baby. I do the odd jobs around the inn, help the customers." He took a quick glance over, and Hoagie saw his eyes were hard. "This long time ago, you understand."

Hoagie shrugged. "Yeah."

"Well." Vespinachuci turned back to the wall, his feet still walking. "Just so you know. Now, my family, we serve both the Spinachians and the Moores, because battle go back and forth so much. The Spinachians, sometimes they get rowdy, and sometimes they not very pleasant, but they all right. And the Moores, they get rowdy more often, and a little wild, yes, but they very… well, very friendly."

There was something of an edge to Vespinachuci's voice as he said this, and Hoagie raised an eyebrow. But he didn't really have time to comment, because the captain kept right on.

"Oh yes, they very friendly, as long as we feed them and give them drink, yes, but one time, when they drink all and we have no more to give, they get angry. They get up from table, they smash, they destroy." Vespinachuci's speech was coming in heated gasps, and his feet were moving at a nearly unbearable clip. "They slash with the sword, they break down the doors. They sicken the air with blood, with smoke. I no can see, and I fall to the floor, feeling my way. The floor, she is covered with glass, and with splinters, and I find my mother there, her hair clotted red. I hear the crackling of flames, the crashing of the inn, the screams of my sister…" Vespinachuci made a strange gulping noise. "I… I hear them scream."

He came to a sudden stop and stood, chest heaving, dark locks hanging loose about his face, mouth twisted around his white teeth. He stood, half-bowed over, lanky frame heaving with his breath.

Hoagie stared at him, and shifted back and forth on his feet awkwardly. He twiddled his thumbs, stared up, down, and along the hallway, rubbed his neck, and swallowed once or twice.

"That's… um… well, wow… uh… that's… uh… that's bad. Yeah. Wow."

Vespinachuci just threw a disgusted look at him.

"Uh…" Hoagie tried to think of something intelligent to say. "Your whole family, huh?"

With another disgusted look, Vespinachuci rose back to his full height, gathered his cape about him, and strode off down the hallway. Hoagie simply stood against the wall, listening to the footsteps squeak into the darkness.

* * *

"There're just some things you don't ask about, kiddo." Numbuh 60 pulled a grape soda out of the fridge and tossed it to 65.3. Turning to Numbuh 1, he offered him one, but getting no response, shrugged and opened it himself. "Orders is orders, and commanders are commanders."

"Don't call ME kiddo!" Numbuh 86 glared at him. "I'm just saying, I'm wondering what these reports are that she keeps getting, and why we can't be in on them ever! What, aren't we trusted enough?"

65.3 shrugged. "Protocols indicate that the Soopreme Commander is privy to a great deal of information and operations that do not go outside of the immediate department they are related to." He let out a little burp. "Even senior chair members are not to be included. It's clearly stated in Section78.3 of bylaw 93.576"

"You should know that, Oh great Tactical-Lady-Sir." 60 sniggered. "You're the one who likes all these top-secret operations that KND never really got into before."

"YOU shut up!" The red-head pointed at the amused 60. "I don't see why the Soopreme Leader can't trust some of her old friends in on some of the intel she gets. It's downright…"

"Aw, shut up yourself." Grunting, 60 crumpled up the can and aimed for the basket. "It's her job, it's what she gets to do. Live with it."

"It's not THAT you stupid BOY, it's that I can't see why WE can't be allowed in on…"

The doors whooshed open in the middle of her sentence, leaving Fanny drowning in a sea of silence with an open mouth and an empty passionate gesture, all in front of Numbuh 362 as she stalked into the lounge.

60 and 65.3 immediately straightened and saluted, 65.3 carefully hiding the can behind himself. 86 snapped her mouth shut and jumped to her feet. Numbuh 1 made no reaction at all.

"Intelligence has just come to light." Numbuh 362 spoke calmly, feet solidly placed, arms crossed behind her back, head held high as if speaking to a crowd of four thousand instead of four. "It indicates that the Spinach Armada and the Candy Pirates are headed for a clash, as expected. This means that, end-wise, Operation SEPARATION has fulfilled its goal, and as such, is considered finished."

She held up a hand to forestall 86's question. "The battle should leave both incapitated and unfit to defend themselves, after which it will be easy to take them out, but until then, Global Command is considering the matter closed and further action unnecessary."

"The operatives…?" Numbuh 60 ventured.

Numbuh 362 looked down for a moment, but then raised her gaze to the black-haired boy. "The operatives knew the risk when they entered. To attempt to recover them would warrant more danger than the attempt is worth. Kids Next Door is abandoning the project, and the compromised operatives will have to deal with the situation."

Numbuh 1's head rose up slowly,

"You're abandoning them." Patton repeated, eyes intent on his commander.

362 shrugged. "There is every reason they will survive the battle, and then a rescue should be significantly easier to attempt."

"But you're abandoning them."

"For the moment…" 362 nodded slowly. "…yes."

* * *

Abby's feet carried her across the deck. She hardly heard the thumping of her boots on the hard wooden deck as she strode toward the prow, her mind frantically grasping at the fringes of different jobs. She had to find out more about these strange voices. She had to get down and do something about 3 and 4. She had to get her sword for the battle tomorrow, and sometime tonight, she needed to get some sleep. But before she could do any of that, she simply had to get some things talked over with Heinie.

With solid, determined steps, she walked straight up to the short, fat silhouette on the prow. She faltered momentarily at the stairs, not sure of how to proceed. Not coming up with anything, she simply walked up to the railing, leaned up against it just next to him, and stared silently off into the distance. Hand on chest, she fingered the necklace around her neck, trying to form the words.

In spite of, or perhaps because of, the many things on Abby's mind, Heinrich was the first to speak. "Zo. You are the first mate now."

"Heh. Yeah." Abby gave a little smile. "Happened kinda during the whole thing with the coffee derek. Sticky needed someone to lead the attack. Too bad, Heinie, but you're too late for that one. I beat ya."

"Hmmph." Heinrich arched an eyebrow. "I never had any desire for that in any case. I vas only ze cabin boy, before, und I left to be out on mein own. I would not return to that which I have flown."

"Oh yeah?" Abby half-turned to study him. "Dat so? Then how come you still on board here? How come you didn't jest hop aboard that Kids Next Door motor scooter and split out of here?"

Heinrich frowned a little. He seemed something at a loss. "Vell… I needed a place for the night, of course. My resources abroad are not vhat they vunce vere. Und vun vishes to see how vun's old friends are doing."

"Uh-huh." Abby grinned. "Sticky did seem glad to see you again." The thought suddenly hit her as significant… Long John had mentioned Heinrich had some role in the deal.

"Yes." Heinrich nodded coldly. "I imagine so."

There was a short silence, and this time, Abby was the one who spoke. "So how long you stayin' with us, Heinie?"

Heinrich seemed to think this over carefully for a moment or two. "For the next week or so, at least. Until ve reach a suitable port for me to begin again."

"Seems a bit long." Abby thought her next question over carefully and finally voiced it. "You sure you don't mind staying here dat long?"

"Abigail…" There was a little pause, and then Heinrich turned fully on her. "I haf thought much in prison. I am no longer your enemy."

Abby turned, slowly, to face him. "Really?" She raised a cautious eyebrow. "You sure about dat?"

"Yes." Heinrich nodded deliberately.

Then drawing closer, he whispered in a hoarse hiss. "But I am also not yet your friend."

Slowly he returned back. "Dere is no hate between us, you and I. But much has yet to go before all returns to as it was. Until then…" He bowed. "Auf Wiedersehen."

Abby watched his dark form fade into the ship and disappear below decks. Looking away, she caught sight of the necklace she was fingering, and let go of the caramel on the string.

It dropped back into place, bouncing to rest near a chincy plastic trinket resembling a neon- colored monkey.

* * *

Nigel was all the way to the hangar bay before the voice stopped him.

"Numbuh 1." It said. "Wait."

Nigel glanced around, his head still heavy, but his eyes with a curious glint. "Wait? I'm returning to my Sector, as ordered."

"As if." A snort. "You're hotwiring one of the attack pods to get into that battle."

Nigel straightened up immediately, pushing his glasses back on his nose, body held erect. "I wondered if you suspected that." His hand lowered discreetly to his sock.

"Hard not to." The voice originated from somewhere in the shadows of the MOSQUITO. "You spend that whole meeting slumped over, hardly replying, and then you walk out right after the announcement of intent." The voice paused, then noted. "You can always tell the steps of a person who's made a decision. They're much clearer."

"Clever of you." Nigel gave a curt, hard chuckle. "Want to explain that decision to me, as long as we're down here?"

The voice paused. "Well, you think you sent your team to their doom, and you know your own standing in the KND is done for, so you figure you might as well make for a last rescue, and if you die…"

"Not that decision." Nigel shook his head irritably. "That one's obvious enough. Everybody knows it, they just don't want to say it."

"Nigel, it's not…"

"I was talking about the other decision." Nigel said loudly and clearly. "Want to explain that decision?"

There was a silence. It wasn't exactly unprepared silence, the voice seemed to have been expecting this question, but still wasn't sure how to respond to it. "Well…" There was a slight clearing of throat. "Commanders aren't always free to follow their wishes, Nigel, you know that. Even they have to take orders."

"Numbuh 362? The Soopreme Leader of the Kids Next Door?" Nigel snorted, backing slowly to the SCAMPER behind him. "I highly doubt it. What orders does she have to take?"

"Nigel, you knew yourself it was the best decision, the ONLY decision, that could've come out of that meeting!" The voice rose sharply. "There was no other option!"

"Maybe not." Nigel jerked his head just slightly. "Maybe I'm being unfair. But that still doesn't mean I have to like it."

"No." The voice admitted. "But it also doesn't mean you have to follow your operatives example and rush off to confront the threat."

"Perhaps." Nigel backed up to the door of the SCAMPER, feeling for the handle. "But I think it does."

He took a breath. "The Kids Next Door never leave behind their operatives, and I never leave behind my teammates. Not even if it's more tactically useful to just stand by and let them blow each other to sourdust." He found the handle, then frowned as he realized it was locked. "But the others were right. Kids Next Door can't interfere. So the only option…" His eyes located a functional SCAMPER just behind the shadow he was talking with. "…is to take action, not as an operative, not as Numbuh 1, not as anything connected with the KND, but simply as Nigel, a concerned independent, who isn't doing an operation, but just trying to save his friends."

Slowly, carefully, he stepped from the locked SCAMPER, towards the unlocked one, towards the shadow.

"So what are you going to do? Try and stop me?"

* * *

"I just gotta ask you a quick question, John, and then I'm gonna let you go. You don't have to stop for very long. But I wanna know, are those two down there tied tight?"

Abby Lincoln looked up anxiously into the sleep-beleagured face of the pirate as he fumbled in his brain for an answer. "Oh, yes miss, they're tied tight, they ain't gettin' away."

"You sure?" Receiving a nod, Abby licked her lips, casting the next question through her mind once more before asking it. "How about the ropes? You use good ropes?"

"Oh yes, miss!" John gave a sleepy nod. "Real good ropes! We tied em' with all that new licorice rope we got down there. That stuff's real good and strong, ain't nobody getting out of it!"

"Okay, thanks John." Abby nodded. "ya can go back to sleep now." John grunted and rolled over, leaving Abby to think.

_Licorice. Numbuh 4 should chew through that in two seconds flat._ She thought. _And then he'll get Numbuh 20,000 and the others loose, and then they'll all get outta here. They'll tell Numbuh 1 and the others to forget about this project…_

She frowned and stopped that thought. _ They'll go_. She told herself. _They'll go and everything will be fine. And I don't have to worry about that any more._

* * *

"Stop you?" The voice seemed rather sadly amused. "I've been trying to do that from day one and it hasn't worked yet."

"No…" And the voice stepped out of the shadows. "Actually, I'm here to come along and help out."

Nigel looked the figure over. Tall, well-built, with blue eyes grinning out from under a steel samaurai helmet and a black facemask covering the face. Jet-style combat boots, two holstered pistols, and a fightstaff, all in a dark black-and-red combat black-ops suit.

He raised an eyebrow. "Haven't seen you in your old spy gear for a year or so, Numbuh 362. Or should I call you Numbuh 206?"

"Neither." The black face mask was pulled down to show an only slightly amused face. "For this one, just call me Rachel."

* * *

**Epilogue**

Kuki hated the dark. But she hated the feeling of those hard slimy things those nasty pirates had tied over them almost worse. And they kept moving! Numbuh 4 kept moving around on his side and make them pull her all over.

"Numbuh 4, could you stop that please?" She whispered. "It's kinda scary."

There was a little pause, and something that sounded like a spit. Then: "I'm trying to eat through the ropes, Kooks. These dumbbells just tied us with some Licorice stuff."

"Oh!" She fell silent. "How's it going?"

"Not so good." Came the grim response. "This licorice tastes awful. I think it's that black stuff. I never could stand black licorice."

* * *

**A/N**: Ooh hahaha! See, I told you I'd get all this together!

Actually, this part needed a bit of rewriting to get it to work, but hey, it's here. I'm kinda shocked at how long all these chapters are. I used to pull out a pretty good 6 pages, and here I am doing nearly twice that amount. I am both sad and grateful for you poor souls who struggle through all this to get to the end.

Now that you have… **READ AND REVIEW!!!** I forgot to say this last time but fortunately most of you did it anyway. Reviews are the life of my existence, the food upon which my soul feeds, the light in my dark dungeon of… Well, you get the idea. But unless you review I have little way of knowing you read this thing!

Oh! And while you're at it, put down guesses about what will happen and what's going on and stuff! I'm trying to work in some things that I heard will come up in the KND season, so take a look at some of the stuff here.

Anyway. Hold fast and persevere, for the end is in sight! I've looked over some of my old papers and I realize how far off track I've gotten but we shall return home again someday, I promise! And as evidence…

**NEXT CHAPTER**: It's the epic clash between the Armada and the Pirates! But when old friends meet in the face of battle, what will transpire?


	16. Conflicted Interests

**Conflicted Interests  
**

* * *

The room was completely dark, except for the faint glow from the table in the middle, just barely sufficient to outline the four figures around it.

The tall one at the head spoke first, and his voice came in a harsh, garbled tone, as if distorted. "Things are going beautifully according to plan."

"If you say so, sir." The voice came from a shorter, darker outline, but the voice had the same distortion. The red light from the table glinted off a pair of sunglasses. "To me, this would seem to be complete chaos."

"No chaos is complete." The reply, again distorted, came from the foot of the table and also glowed with sunglasses. Its form was paler, and long hair seemed hung about its face. "All chaos is ordered."

"Whatever." The face opposite the second voice snorted, giving the curly hair atop his outline a shake. "The point is, how are we supposed to know that things are going the way we want them to?"

"Trust me on this one." The tall one responded. "Our operative has been behaving wonderfully. There is every reason to suppose we will be successful here."

"We could still take some precautions." The dark outline urged. "Surely some measures…"

"Perhaps you are right." Mused the tall form. "I shall think it over."

* * *

The cabin was uncomfortably silent, save for the constant rumble of the engines and the gentle beep of the control panel. Clouds rushed by the window outside, a white blur of motion.

Rachel shifted on the seat and glanced over at Nigel. He had insisted on flying, and had been rather stubborn about her choice of flying craft. But Rachel had been equally stubborn. A SCAMPER was too unwieldy a craft to make an effective strike. It was fine for Sector missions, but otherwise too slow and obvious.

Outside of that discussion, and some polite talk at the beginning, little had been said between the two. Rachel had not asked about the plan, and Nigel had not asked why she had come. She wasn't sure whether to be relieved or disappointed about that, but it wasn't something she could really explain anyway, so she let it go.

But she had to say something. This silence was getting on her nerves. "So." She asked, leaning against the control panel. "Do you have a plan?"

Nigel started and looked over. "Of course!" He answered, annoyed. Rachel gave a little amused smirk, but she did not comment.

The silence settled back into place and rested for a moment or two before Nigel spoke again. "How long has command known about this POOL thing?"

"POOL? Oh yeah, that. Well…" Rachel leaned back a bit. "…Hmmm. I don't know. One of the analysts came up with it during an archival procedure, but it made enough sense to warrant caution, and Numbuh 86 insisted we keep our eyes on it."

"I'll bet she did." Nigel grinned. "But why didn't you ever tell us?"

"Well…" Rachel cast about in her mind for an answer. "It was just a theory. We didn't actually ever think it would come to anything. Besides, what were we supposed to say, something like _your opposites sides turned good so we think you guys might turn bad so be sure not to turn bad whatever you do_?"

"I see." Nigel frowned.

"Besides." Rachel gave a reassuring little smile. "The analyst predicted that whatever happened, Numbuh 4 would NOT turn evil."

Nigel threw a look at her. "He's taken leadership of my sector several times and has a hearty disrespect for rules."

"He's also pretty slow on things." Rachel grinned. "That could be a reason. But that's not what the analyst said. As part of his philosophy of good turning to evil, it also included evil turning to good. Negative Numbuh 4 never turned good, so how could Positive Numbuh 4 turn evil?"

Carefully, she studied Nigel as she said the next words. "It's a mirror. Each person's behavior in that world is the exact opposite of what it would be in this world."

Nigel did not answer, and another uncomfortable silence settled over the cabin.

_I hope he realizes,_ thought Rachel, _that that means that Lizzie could be among the first to turn evil._

_I hope she realizes,_ thought Nigel, _that that means that Fanny could be among the first to turn evil._

* * *

"It is necessary to realize, Brother Hoagie, that all men have the ability to turn evil." Father Spinachoza stood upon the deck of Hoagie's air-ship, breathing in the sea-air. "No man is perfect, for even as in the worst man there is some good, so in the best man there must of necessity be some evil." He gestured to the ships down below. "We of Spinachia take great pride in our civilization, but we must be ever mindful of the fact that were it not for the Green Leaf, we would wallow in dissipation and want, even as the men we now fight against do." He turned to Hoagie with a smile. "One must never think oneself beyond corruption. Do you understand?"

"Huh?" Hoagie looked up from the railing. "Oh! I mean… Sure! Yeah!"

Uncomfortable under Spinachoza's gaze, Hoagie took refuge in studying the fleet beneath them. He was not exactly in a mood to discuss philosophy today anyway,

The meeting with Tommy had not gone very well. Hoagie could not understand it. Tommy liked Spinach himself, though mostly as an emulation of his older brother, so there was no direct conflict. But when asked to agree to serve the Spinach, Tommy steadfastly refused.

_I_, he had said,_work alone_. _I am… The Tommy!_

Hoagie supposed he should have expected that response, but it was still a shock, maybe because it was the first time he could remember that Tommy had refused to do something with him. _Most of the time he's hanging around me so much it's downright annoying. _He frowned_. Now all of a sudden he's taking this 'alone' stuff so seriously. What's with that?_

_More importantly_, spoke up a new voice in his head, _why does that bug you so much? I thought you wanted to be left alone, you should be happy, right?_

_Well, yeah._ He responded. _But… I don't know, I guess it's just awful sudden. I'm just surprised, that's all._

_Sure_. Came the voice back. _ Or maybe you've always liked him worshipping you, and you're upset that all of a sudden you're not a god to him anymore._

_Oh, shut up!_ Hoagie growled at the voice irritably. He wondered momentarily if he was going crazy. _I'm not jealous or anything, it's just surprising! I'm just not used to it, alright?_

_Or maybe,_ the voice continued, seemingly oblivious to himself, _maybe you think you're not doing the right thing and you want his approval._

_Be quiet! I know what the right thing is and I'll do it!_ Hoagie tensed his eyes, glaring at the fleet. _I'm working undercover, okay? Hey, I… I did get the pirates to fight the Spinach, didn't I? That was my mission, wasn't it?_

_Yeah._ The voice conceded. _But that's more because of a lucky accident than anything you did. And anyway, you're helping the Spinachian side. You are hoping they'll win, aren't you?_

_Well… _Hoagie stopped in mid retort and frowned. _Okay. Maybe. But still…_

"Do you not agree, Brother Hoagie?"

Hoagie blinked and looked up at Father Spinachoza, who smiled and repeated his question. "Do you not feel that even the best man will have struggles against the evil in him?"

"Oh yes! Yes, most definitely!" Hoagie nodded hastily.

"And so it is also in the world." Spinachoza gestured out at the sea. "Even in the best of worlds, there will always be evil, and while there is evil, good must strive against it."

"Oh yes." Hoagie nodded. "Makes sense." _What on earth am I supposed to do anyway…?_

"And no one must shirk from this conflict." Spinachoza frowned at the glowing sea. "Not even those who would consider themselves men of peace."

He glanced down sharply. "Is your celery stalk sharp, Brother Hoagie?"

"Huh?" Hoagie glanced up, startled from thought. "Oh! I mean, yeah, I sharpened it with the grindstone just this morning."

"Good." Spinachoza nodded benevolently. "Make sure your Broccolibuss pistols are primed also. Many a tight spot have I gotten out of through the timely discharge of a pistol."

* * *

"Abby don't like this." Abigail Lincoln frowned at the fleet behind. "Twenty-something ships and every one of 'em crawling with Moores. Not a happy situation."

"Ja." Heinrich clapped his telescope shut, handing it over to her. "Ze captain says he haf enof men to cover all of zem, but I am not so easy in mein mind."

"What you said." Abby agreed, lifting the telescope herself. "And Abby also don't get where all these new hands come from, either." She focused on the distant horizon, scanning for trouble. "Jest yesterday we was screaming fer more to man the top sail, and all of a sudden, people ain't no problem at all? It don't make sense." There was not a sail in sight, only empty, endless ocean.

Beside her she heard Heinrich give a slight cough. "The captain haf many friends. Perhaps he send to them. Or maybe he offers more candy. Is difficult to say."

"Dat's true." Abby nodded. There was a flying fish bouncing above the waves. Fascinating. "Still, it seems funny somehow."

"Excuse me, missus?"

Abby turned from the sea, handing the telescope over to Heinie. "Hey, John, howya been?" She grinned up at the bumbling giant. "What's new?"

"Nuttin' miss, except the captain wants to see ye up on the poop deck." Long John played around with his nose. "Says it's about the battle."

"Gotcha." Abby nodded, starting off, just pausing to ask. "By the way, John, did you get the prisoners breakfast?"

"Oh yeah!" John nodded. "They're being nice and quiet down there. They didn't like the food, but they said thanks anyway!"

Abby frowned. They hadn't gotten loose yet? But Numbuh 4 had always…

She stopped. No time to think about that. Sticky needed to talk with her. She was just moving away when there came a call from the masthead.

"Sail ahoy!"

* * *

"What are they doing now?" Came the distorted query from the dark shadow. "I thought they were supposed to battle once they met like that."

"They **are**." There was the glint of braces in the red light as the curly-haired shadow smirked. "If you knew anything about battle, you'd see they're drawing up their forces. It's hard to maneuver ships once the battle begins. Placement in the beginning is everything."

"Exactly." The tall smile leaned forward. "From this point, it's largely out of our hands. All we can do is sit back and watch."

"Completely out of control, then." Affirmed the dark shadow.

"Out of _our_ control." Pointed out the pale shadow. "Not out of Control itself."

"But outside of anything we can do."

"Yes." The tall shadow nodded.

The four watched silently as the ships on the screen stopped moving. A string of colors ran up the mast of the lead Spinach ship.

"Now comes the fun part." Grinned the tall shadow as the two lines began to close upon each other.

* * *

"_Todo hombres abajo_

!"

Gumballs tore through wood and water, ripping the deck to shreds. Men collapsed to the ground, covered in gooey gum, unable to move. Hoagie leapt to one side as one unusually large one smashed in the dead center of the poop deck.

"Stand fast, Brethren! Captain, another shot to the head ship!" Spinachoza roared, splinters flying about him.

"_Si_!" Spinachoza dove beneath decks. "_Soldados! Disparen a la barca en la parte! Por Spinacha! Disparen!"_

The ship shook as the cannons roared, sending another salvo of brussel sprouts into the air toward the oncoming fleet. Hoagie had no time to see how they hit, for again he heard, "_Abajo! Todo hombres abajo_!", and threw himself to the deck.

Again gumballs came whistling down upon them, burying themselves in mast and main. But this time there was something new. The air suddenly took fire with an electric blue glow as an enormous beam of light scorched past them just to the left.

Blast it. Hoagie thought. Where on earth did he get another one of those?

"Brother Hoagie!" The call woke him from his battle-daze and he struggled to his feet, pushing past sailors, soldiers, and monks on his way to the front.

"Yes, Holy Father!?" He gasped.

Father Spinachoza was lying on the deck, his leg encased in a blood-red blotch of gum. Several monks were frantically pulling at the stuff, trying to free the priest. Spinachoza pointed at him. "You must take your ship and take off immediately! Go straight for the head ship! That is the second salvo we have taken from that cannon! We cannot risk another! Send your men onto the ship and destroy it!

"But… how do I…?" Hoagie dithered, playing with his fingers. "We've never…"

"NOW!" The priest screamed, and Hoagie turned and fled.

* * *

"Vegetables! They be shooting vegetables!" Stickybeard screamed in unbelief. "That's treachery, that is! Why, I…"

"All hands down!"

Abby threw herself to the deck, as another screaming salvo of brussel sprouts ripped into the Sweet Revenge. Pirates were running, yelling, screaming, and the green vines were everywhere.

"That does it!" Stickybeard heaved himself onto his foot and stump. "I'll be salt-swabbed before I let a cursed vegetable get the best of me! Fire the big gun at them again! And hit it this time, by the powers!"

"_Oui, mon capitan_!" Nough and Latier rushed about the looming gun, adjusting the arch, angle, trajectory. "All is in readiness!"

"Then fire!"

The deck was suddenly etched in stark blue and white as the pillar of crackling energy appeared at the nozzle of the cannon, tearing through the air, over toward the ship fast approaching them…

…and over and past its bow, smashing into a small skiff that was doing some flanking action.

Stickybeard clapped his hand to his brow. "By the powders! Are ye blind, or just drunk?"

"Cap'n!" The call came from the crows nest. "There's summat going on back behind the fleet!"

Abby leapt to the mast, clambering up the ropes lining the sides, and made it halfway up before stopping to peer out at the seething battlefield.

Sticky, puffing and blowing, came up next to her. "Can ye see it, lassie?"

"Uh-huh." Abby pointed a hand out.

Slowly, incredibly, the immense and ponderous bulk of a ship was raising itself above the swaying mastheads of the Spinachians.

"But as for what it is," The girl shook her head. "Abby shor' don't know that."

* * *

"The Spinachians used that ship of theirs faster than what I thought." The dark shadow spoke, rubbing his finger over his mouth.. "I thought they would keep it in reserve."

"I think it's in response to the cannon on the _Sweet Revenge_." Pointed out the curly-headed one. "They couldn't have been expecting that."

"Probably." Nodded the dark shadow. "Perhaps this battle will go quicker than we expected."

"Fascinating, in a way." The pale shadow mused, leaning more into the light as he studied the unfolding battle. "The forces of Order and Chaos, met in the great struggle against one another."

The other shadows glanced at him. He looked up.

"Generally speaking, you understand." He arched an eyebrow. "On the one hand, we have the disciplined, the orderly, the ones who do what they think is right. On the other, we have the passionate, the chaotic, the ones who do only as they feel is right."

There was a silence. Then, from the tall shadow. "You are weird."

* * *

"Wow." Hoagie leaned over the railing, watching the ships moving out on the ocean below. "I kinda thought they'd all be firing at us, since we're all so high up and they gotta be scared, but there's not a shot. Weird."

"Is possible their cannons not able to shoot up here, _senor_." Pointed out the heavy-set seaman assigned to Hoagie. He was standing a good distance from the railing, and kept glancing about, apparently expecting something to break off. "The cannons, they are very set in place, not able to fire upwards."

"Hmmm." Hoagie raised his eyebrows. "Well, that makes stuff easier for us, I guess."

The seaman shifted anxiously and cast another glance about the ship. "Should we not fire, Senor?"

"Huh? Oh! Yeah, right away!" Hoagie turned, nodding. "Fire the cannons on the, uh… umm…." He pointed. "What side is this again?"

"Starboard, _senor_." The seaman's face showed neither amusement nor exasperation.

"Right! Fire the cannons on the starboard side, toward that ship in the middle there." Hoagie pointed. "And tell the topmen to rig the sails like I told them—the 'parachute' thing. We're going to go down a little."

* * *

The brussel sprouts came screaming from the skies, slashing through sail, rigging, and floor. Pirates reeled and clutched their middles as the leaves exploded about them. Sailors gathered around the holes, slashing at the curling vines desperately with their swords.

Abby dodged under Bubbleosa's lanky frame and came panting up to the captain. "Three of them vegetables landed square in the cannon, cap'n! Nough and Latier said it'll take a while to get it clear!"

"Curses!" Stickybeard thumped across the deck at high speed. He stopped and hollered down the hole. "Keep a'firin' at that lead ship across there!" Resuming his stumping, he glowered down at the grim girl. "Only thing to do, use the two swivel guns at front, turn them to face up. But those'll hardly put a dent in anything!"

Abby shook her head. "Cap'n, we gotta get that thing! It's tearing into the whole fleet up there!"

Stickybeard champed his teeth together. "I'm thinkin', lassie, I'm…"

"All hands down!"

Sticky and Abby threw themselves to the deck. Another screaming salvo shuddered through the ship, sending splinters flying, but Abby noticed something odd. This time, there was also a rattling sound, as if of many tiny shots.

"No!" Sticky leapt back to his feet. Half the crew on deck were rolling on the ground, and the planking was covered in tiny green pellets. "Peashot! They hit us with peashot!"

"Peashot?" Abby frowned, jumping after the captain as he charged back to the hatch leading below.

"Small pellets packed tightly together in place of ordinary shot that…" Sticky stopped at the hatch and yelled. "John! Get one of those cannons up here! …sweeps the entire deck. Like a whole battalion of pistol fire. We call it sour-grapeshot."

"Whatcha going to do with a cannon up here?" Abby hurried after him. "They're fixed, they can't point upwards!"

"They can if I lash one to the main mast." Sticky growled. "It'll shake the deck to pieces, but if I can get a decent shot or two at him, it'll be worth it. Now help me with these swivel guns!"

Abby gave a last glance up at the ship as she rushed after the captain. It was pretty low in the sky.

* * *

"I thought you said the ships couldn't shoot upward!" Hoagie yelled, throwing a lever. "Where are all of these gumballs coming from?"

"We are much lower now, senor!" The seaman pointed far out. "The ships just beneath us, that we fire at, they cannot hit, but those at the edges, they have enough angle to reach up to us."

"Good thing they're such terrible shots at such long range, I guess." Hoagie picked at his teeth nervously. Gumballs sailed to port, aft, starboard, but none hit. "Still, if any of them sink in a good hit, we're sunk. There aren't a lot of backup systems on this ship. Why are they all shooting at us, for crying out loud? There's a whole fleet of Spinachians out there!"

"We are flying,_senor_." The seaman pointed out. "We are somewhat prominent, yes?"

"I suppose I could go higher." Hoagie's fingers tapped the edge of the lever nervously. "But that would make our shots much less accurate. We're pushing it as it is." He turned to the seaman. "What if we…"

The two were suddenly thrown to the floor as the whole deck leaned to one side. The whirring of the propellers took on a strained, asthmatic sound.

"_Por madre de D_…" The seaman shook his head and lumbered to his feet. "Now what happen?"

Hoagie was already up and throwing levers and pressing buttons. "Somehow we've got an anchor! It's pulling us down on the…. Uh…" His face twisted in confusion. "on the… Oh, whatever, on the right side! The side that's leaning down!"

"Starboard."

"Whatever! But it's dragging us down, and setting all the propellers off! It could send us crashing down! Someone must've gotten a line caught onto us!"

* * *

Abby clambered up the rope, sword clutched in her teeth, pistol rubbing against her leg. Her arms and legs flew over the cable, toward the dark hulk above, and the open mouths of its guns. Behind followed four-and-twenty able-bodied seamen, armed to the teeth.

A simple hook loaded into a swivel gun and a steady hand to guide it had been all that was necessary. Done with that, it was just like boarding another ship. Incredibly fast, incredibly frenzied, incredibly risky, even if they were boarding toward the hull, where there were no cannons.

Only a few more feet… two feet… one foot… six inches… up, over… and she was on the deck, gun and pistol in hand.

It was remarkably empty, except for a score of odd-looking propellers, a number of enormous wooden wheels, and a husky seaman with twenty-two sailors behind him charging toward her.

* * *

"Boarders?!" Hoagie stared out the window with amazement, as his hands worked feverishly among the levers and buttons. "So that's where the cable… but how did they… Oh whatever!"

He paused a moment, looking at the control panel. "Can't correct this from here. The hamsters are doing all they can already. Cable! Need to cut that cable!"

He grabbed at his celery cutlass as he dashed for the door.

* * *

The deck was a seething rage of battle. Abby felt once again the glorious fury of battle on her as she whirled and dodged. The husky seaman was up against her. His slow, guarded fencing might not match the fire of her fight, but it was infuriating hard to penetrate.

She saw an opening and took it. Gleaming celery met the point of her peppermint. She tried two strikes in succession. He met both. Hearing a yell behind her, she whirled and slashed through a seaman before whipping back to block a strike.

The blood thundered in her ears, pounding in every vein of her. She ducked low, slashed at his feet, whipped back up, stabbed at him…

* * *

Hoagie followed up with a quick slash to the belly. Paying no heed to the groaning pirate, he continued his charge across the deck, ducking under pirates' legs, elbowing them, even simply stepping aside for a moment as they roared past. He needed to get to that cable.

It was on the... right side, because that was the way the ship was lurching. The pirates were mostly toward the back, although they were slowly working up forward, so they must've come from...

There it was! But he would have to get through the pirates to get to it!

A plan occurred to him. A quick jump, and he was clambering to the topsail 'parachute.'

* * *

Slash, slash, block. Back up a step, feint, press on. Duck low, slash…

Blast! Celery again!

No problem. Step back, lurch forward, leap up, slash down. Miss. Kick, rebound. Slash left, right, over the back. Block. Step back…

The entire deck whipped upwards, throwing the whole party to the deck.

* * *

Hoagie was fighting two pea-sized pirates who kept muttering French phrases at him. Both were extremely skilled, fast, and clearly deadly.

Hoagie had never felt so elated.

Climbing over the awning had been the best idea ever! And even if these two had caught sight of him, he had still managed to cut the rope! Now the ship was flying again, and there was no way for any more pirates to get on board!

Hoagie was feeling pretty good.

* * *

Abby got up first, and clubbed the seaman with her sword. With a fresh yell, she threw herself at the line of green-clad sailors.

* * *

A quick punch to the face, and the blue one fell to the deck. That startled the red one long enough for Hoagie to slash him in the legs.

Hoagie grinned and then leapt forward. Now to the battle.

* * *

Abby was fighting, slashing, breaking. Her sword arm was tiring, but she was as fiery as ever. Steps behind her. Turn, and discharge a pistol, then whirl back and club the sailor coming at her with it. Throw it away and keep on.

* * *

Hoagie ran forward. The main problem seemed to be coming from that pirate in the red bandanna. His hand slid to the pistol in his belt.

* * *

Abby saw a little green movement out of the corner of her eye. Her hand shot down to her belt.

* * *

Hoagie's pistol came up...

* * *

Abby whirled, pistol in hand…

And they froze.

For a moment they stood there, each staring at the black hole of the pistol facing them. The pirates and sailors, recognizing the standoff, backed off slowly.

Slowly, slowly, Abby's eyes left the pistol. Slowly, slowly, they traveled over the short green monk standing in front of her. And slowly, slowly her tightened eyes widened in astonishment as she saw the smirk on his face slowly, slowly collapse into dismay.

"Uh… N… N… Numbuh 5?"

"H… Hoagie?"

No one can know what might have happened next. No one can know how the recognition of a fellow agent might have affected them. No one can know whether the pistols tilted upwards to relax, or to aim better at the other.

No one can know, because at that moment, the skies were torn open by a yellow streak of vengeance. The air was burnt apart by a blast of hot air as an aircraft thundered past. And the whole fight upon the ship was blown apart by red-clad boy of sunglasses, a boy who leapt from the aircraft to land fully upon the deck, a sword in one hand and a mustard pistol in the other.

"Numbuhs 2 and 5 of the Kids Next Door." Stated Nigel Uno, bringing his sword up in a defensive posture as the other two turned to face him. "You are hereby ordered to return to your sector, pending investigation into your activities."

Hoagie and Abby stared at him, uncomprehending.

* * *

The four shadows around the table started slightly. The dark one leaned forward. A slight squeak came from the curly-headed one. The pale one made no sign, but his hand rose to his mouth in a uncharacteristic gesture.

The tall shadow spoke first, and his voice was slow, a trifle hesitating.

"That" he said, tapping his chin contemplatively. "was not supposed to happen."

* * *

**A/N**: Sorry to throw another wrinkle into this already twisted plot, but actually the shadow-people is part of the official KND plot, I think. If you've seen WHITEHOUSE, you might know what I'm describing.

There's more detail about sea-battle here than is really probably necessary. I find action tends to drag in a book, but I needed to get through it someway. I tried to be realistic as well as cartoony. I don't think I succeeded very well at either, but that's your decision, not mine.

Speaking of which…**READ AND REVIEW!** Your reviews are half the reason I am working on this and not another quarter-dozen things I should be doing! Tell me what you want! What you hate! What you love! What you simply don't understand! Shoot, tell me you read it and I'll be happy!

Thanks to all who have reviewed, you have no idea how it helps me. I'm hoping to get this tied up before the new episodes air in November, which is all but impossible, but I might as well hope.

I have a treat for all of you, a pic of 2 and 5 when they meet. You can find it if you search SEPARATION 2 and 5, but here's the link. .com/art/Separation-2-and-5-67504985

**Next Chapter**: 1, 2, and 5 fight it out atop ships and wheels in a towering homage to Pirates of the Carribean. Who will stand, who will fall, and who will run?


	17. Betrayal

**Betrayal**

**

* * *

  
**

On the sea below, explosions shook the battlefield. The ships, freed from the bombardment of the flying ship, went about their murderous duty under the darkening sky.

Up above, the pirates and seamen had woken from their pause and returned to the struggle. The fight flowed around the three in the middle, a blur of pistol explosions, sword slashes, and enraged roars. Yet in the center, the three stood perfectly still, facing one another.

Hoagie's eyes were nearly popping from his eyeholes. "N… n… numbuh 1? But… you weren't… I mean, how did you… I mean…" His sword wavered downward to the deck. "What's going on here?"

Nigel's sword was out, gleaming in the hot afternoon sun. "I'm here to bring the two of you out of here, that's what's going on."

"But this is…"

"Like sourballs you are!" Abby's sword whipped toward Nigel. "Dere's a battle going on down there! You think Abby's just gonna up and leave everybody to fall and burn like that?"

Hoagie frowned.

"Your whole mission was to get them to fall and burn." Nigel stated, raising an eyebrow. "You've done a good job. Now let's get moving. The ships can take each other out from here."

"Aw, the mission can go to…"

"No, wait, hang on!" Hoagie's hand brushed through his hair. "Listen, uh, Numbuh 1, I… we can't just… I mean, there are friends of mine down there!"

"Same thing here." Abby glared from one boy to the other. "Abby's got a whole ship full of mates down there countin' on her, and she ain't leavin' them behind just cause you decided to shove in on here, Baldy."

"Care to remember how I got bald?" Nigel's fingers clenched around his pistol. "Listen, you two, the mission was to get these two to fight each other and wipe themselves out. This was what you were always supposed to do." He took a step forward. "Now if you come with me, now, Global Command might take that the excuse that you were always working to do this. They might excuse the whole thing with the agents they sent in, they might overlook…"

"Aw, SHUT UP!" Abby's sword swiped up and straight at Nigel Uno.

Hard, 2x4 wood met and blocked her attack, and she found herself staring at a placid pair of sunglasses. Hoagie, still standing apart, watched the two, somewhat frightened.

The fight still raged around them, like a sea in storm around an island of quiet. Abby stared at Nigel, and Nigel at Abby.

Finally, Abby spoke, and the words from her mouth came stiff and terse. "Abby is not leaving her friends to die here. Not by you, not by the Kids Next Door…"

"Hey, you guys, cool it for a sec…" Hoagie stepped forward.

"And ESPECIALLY not by you!" Abby's pistol was up and clicked into position. Hoagie stopped. "Abby is angry enough to find you was the one shooting at her friends, so don't push her! Sourballs, she thought there was somethin' funny about this flyin' ship. What you thinking of, anyway, Numbuh 2?"

"Well, I… I…" Hoagie dithered a little. "It was just a sort of… project… It kinda…"

"You and your ship are going DOWN, baby!" Abby screamed. "Abby's sick of all you people butting in like this! If you would just go away, things would work out just fine!"

"Well, uh…" Hoagie stepped back a step or two. "I just… I mean… weren't we…"

"First Numbuh 20,000." Abby stepped toward the frightened boy, eyes blazing. "Dat was bad enough. Then you guy jumped onto my ship jest when Abby was having a good time! Finally, Abby gets up here, and Abby finds you've been wailing on my mateys the whole time!? And then YOU show up!" Abby whirled back to face a glaring Nigel. "If you people could just stay to yerselves, and not mess around with things, this wouldn'ta happened!"

"Fine." Nigel spoke calmly and coldly. "Numbuh 2, help me with Numbuh 5 here. After that, we can all just leave and forget about this."

"Fat chance!" Abby snorted.

"Leave? Here?" Hoagie stepped back, eyes wide. "I… ah… I can't… I mean… my projects, I'm…" He looked about the ship as if seeking help. "I'm… Padre… I have a…" He gave it up and faced Nigel decisively. "I… I mean… I've got… , There are…I can't just just leave them."

Nigel stared at him. "Numbuh 2, who do you think you…"

"I… uh… I'm Brother Hoagie." Hoagie replied, bringing up his sword, an expression of mixed resolve and distress on his face. "And I… I kinda have to defend this ship."

Nigel looked from one to the other. He sighed, drew back a step, brought up his sword. "I really didn't want to believe Rachel on this one." He said. "But if this is really the way things have gone…" His eyes hardened. "…then this is the only way to go."

The three stood, swords out, pistols at the ready, in the midst of the swirling battle.

"Abby's here to take down the ship, and if you get in the way, you too."

"I'm here to take the both of you into custody. You can go either easy or hard."

"I… really don't want my ship wrecked. Are you sure we can't find another way to do this?"

A peppermint sword lunged through the air toward him.

* * *

"Clarify." The dark shadow at the table frowned, staring at the pale one. The other two exchanged glances. "You don't think we should interfere?"

There was the hint of a shrug from the pale shadow. "It's not something that was in the original strategy, but as an event I find it rather interesting. And I don't think it will cause any major difficulties." He cast a glance toward the tall shadow. "I think we should we remain observant at this point."

There was a silence. The three turned to face the tall shadow at the head of the table.

After some thought, the tall shadow nodded. "Very well." It replied. "Let us see how our friends interact."

* * *

"Think about this!" Nigel yelled, slashing down furiously at Abby, pausing only to block a wavering attack from Hoagie. "They're your enemies! They're**our** enemies! It's not worth to turn on all of us for them!"

"Oh, Abby's thought about it shor nuf." Snarled the girl. "She's thought about it, and maybe it ain't. But if you wouldn't keep nosin' around here like you is, she wouldn't have to turn on anybody! Things were jest fine around here before all you people started to pop up all over the place."

"Listen, I…" Hoagie made another futile attack at Nigel's back.

"We were worried!" Nigel blocked an attack at him and struck forward. "Command didn't even know where you were!"

"And what made you think Abby had to be looked after?!" Abby screamed, leaping high, discharging a pistol harmlessly into the wood. "Abby can look after herself jest fine!"

"You sound like me, six months ago." Nigel's eyes narrowed. "Second in command or not, you still need the team as much as any of us."

A foot suddenly slipped out from under Nigel's guard and kicked him full in the face, sending him flying through the air. He crashed, with a grinding crumble of wood, into an enormous wheel attached to the main propeller.

Abby jumped after him with a scream and landed directly on top of him. Her sword flew down, Nigel's blocking it at the last minute.

"DON"T you DARE tell Abby about what she needs and doesn't need!" She screamed into his face. "None of you at the treehouse has ANY idea about what she goes through, about what Abby has to do! Livin' with your hero an' your worst enemy all together, spending every waking moment on your guard, living an act!" Her other fist came out and began to pummel Nigel in the face. "You don't have any idea what it's like! Abby's done tons of missions apart from you guys, missions you people don't even know about! Heck, she's pulled you guys outta more scrapes than she can remember! She don't need you people atall!"

"Numbuh 5! Numbuh 1!" Hoagie came hurrying up. "That's the central differential gear you've landed in! If it breaks…"

Abby's arm came out and grabbed him, yanking him into the wheel and close to her face. "YOU shut up too! Cryin' out loud… You got even less an idea of what Abby goes through! You don't understand her at all either!"

"Uh… huh?" Hoagie blinked at her. "I never said I did! Can we just calm down and…"

"Exactly!" Abby yelled at him, shoving him down to the floor of the wheel. "You… you're always… you're always asking questions about this or that, and trying to show how this ain't right or that ain't right. You try and make everybody happy, make 'em laugh with those stoopid jokes of yours! You ain't anything like Abby!"

"I know! I know!"" Hoagie nodded frantically, trying to get through. "But this wheel we're in…"

"Fer cryin' out loud, yer more like CREE than anything else." Abby snarled. "No wonder the two of you… the two of you get on… so…" She drew a breath and whipped her sword down, slamming Hoagie and his celery stalk to the ground. "WHY DON"T YOU JUST GET OUTTA HERE!?"

"I… Look, Numbuh 5…" Hoagie looked around frantically. "I just… I…" Something seemed to click in his face and it cleared. "Listen, Numbuh 5, I just try to lighten up everybody sometimes!"

Abby's eyes hardened. The reddening sky of the sunset lit her frame dark against it.

"Well… you know. Everybody's always so serious all the time, always trying to be cool and stuff. They never take a moment to lighten up, or anything!" Hoagie gulped as the sword inched closer to him. "So… I dunno. I just figure people could stand to lighten up sometimes and… and… I dunno. Just… people like you. You know?"

Abby growled, eyes narrowing, but the sword did not press forward. "You wouldn't say that if you was in Abby's shoes. Abby doesn't have time to be all reckless..."

"Then what're you in the pirates for?" Hoagie cocked his head. "Isn't that all what being a pirate is about?"

There was a silence. A low groan sounded from Nigel, just behind them

"I… Abby…" Abby backed up a step or two. "Abby jest… she was jest having… it was kinda fun… Abby can't…"

"Of course." Hoagie frowned. "I guess, maybe if you had the chance to relax and stuff…"

"It ain't ANYTHING like that!" Abby reared back and swept the sword down, but Hoagie rolled left and jumped to his feet.

"No, seriously! Hoagie was speaking fast, frantically, his sword flying in a desperate attempt to defend himself. "You never give yourself a chance to relax! I mean… yeah, you sit and read and stuff, but you never tell any of us anything of what's going on in your mind! I didn't know about half the stuff you just said until now!" He ducked under a particularly vicious swipe and stood upright. "I mean, you say we don't understand you, but how are we supposed to if you never tell us anything about yourself?"

"Shut UP!"

"But how do you…"

The conversation was interrupted at this moment by two noises. One was Nigel standing to his feet, bruised and broken, but very much still in the fight.

The other was the sound of cracking wood as the enormous wheel broke from it's holdings and began to roll across the deck.

* * *

"Hmmmm." The tall shadow leaned forward. "That's interesting."

"Three people, doing a swordfight, in the middle of a turning wheel." The curly-headed shadow laughed. "That's gotta be the craziest thing I've ever seen."

The other three looked at him.

"What?"

* * *

Abby's feet stumbled quickly back over the bumped, uneven wood turning wildly under her feet, her arms flailing about in a desperate attempt to make a strike at Nigel, who was running like her, and just barely blocking her reckless strikes. Hoagie could be just heard on the far side of the wheel, frantically scrambling up the side. She had a vague impression of sailors on the dark deck running around screaming, and of the whole ship tilting rather strangely, but she had neither time nor inclination to check it out.

"You were my lieutenant!" She heard Nigel scream. "My second in command! You were the one who GOT me into the Kids Next Door, for crying out loud!"

"Abby only joined the KND cause her sis was in it!" Abby screamed, sword extending in a wobbly slash. "Cause she wanted to follow her sis no matter what!"

"H.. Heh.." came Hoagie's panting voice from the far side. "Sounds kinda like Tommy in the…"

"Shut up!" Abby slashed at the air. "After her sis left, Abby kept on cause she was trying to do better than her sis, trying to beat her! But she's got a better idea now." A slow smile spread across the girl's dark face. "Now, she thinks she's just gonna make a new life, and fergit all about her dumb sis. Who needs her anyway?"

"Oh please." Numbuh 1 backpedaled rapidly as the red and white glittered in front of him. "As if that really solves anything."

"Can't… exactly… forget about these things… either…" Hoagie was just visible, coming upwards in something of a running crawl. "I've… been…. Guys, we should really get off this thing…"

"And you!" Nigel threw a glance over his left shoulder. "We've been friends since nearly kindergarten! Why'd you do this, Hoagie?"

"It… was…" Hoagie panted. "I… It's not… you don't… I don't want to do this… Nigel… But… it's my duty."

"Aw, fer crying out loud…" Abby groaned.

"Duty!?" Nigel nearly turned, except a strike from Abby reminded him of his position. "Your **duty** is to the KND, Hoagie! Not the Spinach Armada!"

"But…" Hoagie was nearly up, and he struck at Nigel, who easily dodged. "I owe it… to them…" He looked pleadingly at Nigel. "If I go with… you… now… the armada could fall… and… with it… most of Spinachia… They're… depending on me…"

"Always trying to look like the hero, huh?" Abby was back in the conversation. "And you don't think about these things, you just do whatever you're told…"

Hoagie shook his head. "You haven't met these people, you don't know how important this is… to them and… WHUAH!!!!."

A rut caught one of Hoagie's sandals, sending him sprawling backwards, and he barely managed to grab hold of the wheel, once again climbing up the far side. "Guys!" He panted. "We really need to get off of..."

A sudden jolt rid his statement of any meaning. With a crashing shudder, the wheel threw him free to the reeling deck, while Nigel, knocked off balance by the sudden jolt, stumbled face first into Abby, sending her falling through a hole into the inside of the massive wheel.

Hoagie watched, dazed, as the enormous wooden wheel went careening over the side of the ship, into the darkening sky far down towards the water below.

"Oh dear." His eyes looked rather dazed.

A seaman ran up to him. "Cap'n! The propellers aren't working with that wheel gone! We're going down, fast!"

THAT roused him. "Rig the parachute topsail! Fold out those emergency awnings I had made! And find some rope! Maybe I can break our fall!"

* * *

In reeling, unbroken, untouchable air, the wheel raced toward the dimly glittering sea below. Chips and splinters flew from it, unable to keep up with the wild race of its fall.

Inside the wheel, gravity had been suspended. Falling with the wheel and as the wheel, Abby and Nigel flailed about in the wheel.

"Numbuh Five, you are an Operative of the Kids Next Door!" Nigel shouted against the wind. "You cannot simply leave!"

Out came Abby's long arm, grabbing Nigel by the throat, bringing him up close to her

"Always about the Kids Next Door…." She hissed. "Always about being the leader…" She shook her head. "Can't you ever look at the people around you?"

She tossed him from her. "Abby ain't no operative. Abby's a pirate."

And then the wheel hit the sea, and all was wood, and water, and pain, shooting pain.

* * *

"Hmm…" The tall shadow drew back a little. "Well, it appears you were right, Numbuh 7. That was worth observing."

"I do not make many mistakes." Observed the pale shadow, grinning slightly. "In any case, I thought it better than making our presence more obvious than it is already."

"True." The tall shadow seemed troubled. "That reminds me, we need to come up with a better cover for our…"

"They could be dead, you realize." Spoke the curly shadow, rather sharply. "And we have observed Nigel Uno too long to loose him now."

"They're not dead." The dark shadow pointed. "Look."

* * *

Nigel's hand groped wildly in the water, seeking an anchor in this encroaching, suffocating, void. The water pressed in, the water surrounded, the water choked, air burst from his lungs…

And a hand shot down and grabbed him.

* * *

Abby flailed about desperately in the water, her sword dragging her to the bottom. In a fury of passion, she ripped it off and strove anxiously, desperately for the freedom of air beyond the pressing prison of the ocean…

Several hands shot out and caught her in their strong grip.

* * *

Gasping and choking, Nigel stumbled onto the side of the yellow assault craft, which sat like a bouncing bubble on the waves. Pulling with all her might, Rachel hauled him out, over the edge, crashing into the tiny vessel. It rocked in a most disturbing fashion.

Coughing, Nigel gazed at her bleary-eyed. "Rachel?..." He croaked. "Did… did you get…"

"We saw you falling." She offered. "I dived down and went after you."

"Oh." He nodded. "But… The others?"

"Oh… that." She gestured to the rear of the craft, nearly shrouded in darkness. Packed in tightly were Numbuhs Three and Four, as well as Numbuh 20,000 and his team of SEALs.

Nigel's face offered a weary grin.

"It worked fine." Rachel smiled. "With all the fighting, no one noticed me sneaking down to the brig and breaking them out."

"Guess you've still got some of that old spy in you."

Rachel shrugged. "Finding 3 and 4 was harder. And getting out wasn't easy either. But I don't think anyone noticed us. We shouldn't have any trouble getting out."

Numbuh 20,000 lifted an eyebrow. "Sir, if you want my opinion…"

"Blowing the ship to smitereens is not an option." Rachel spoke sharply. "We're trying to get out without further compromising the situation. Now just sit still." She looked over at Nigel, who was still coughing. "Are you alright, Nigel? How did your part go?"

Nigel shook his head, staring at the floor. "I… I couldn't convince them…" He mumbled. "Hoagie's all caught up in his new responsibilities and duties, and Abby…" He shook his head. "…She's stuck by her new friends."

"That might be a problem." 20,000 frowned. "I heard some of the pirates talking on the way out of here."

* * *

Gasping and choking, Abby was hauled out of the water, up and over the side of the jolly boat. She rocked back and forth with the cold, shivering, rubbing her chest to keep herself warm, and turned to look gratefully at her rescuers…

And they pounced on top of her, pinning her arms behind her back and holding them down.

* * *

Five minutes later, a wet, bedraggled, and licorice-bound prisoner was hoisted onto the deck. The sailor threw her to the floor with a crash, and as she struggled to her feet, she faced…

"Mein sweet child, but I fear I cannot have you running about the ship uny more. It is very dangerous to the vessel." Heinrich Von Marzipan smiled sickly at her. "And I must confess, I do not think you vill look kindly on mein plan."

"Heinie!" Abby surged forward, but the pirates grabbed hold of her, held her back. "Just what in the Sam's Hills do you think you're doing? I'm first mate aboard this here ship!"

"Oh, so you veeeere!" Heinrich stated enthusiastically, as if he had just remembered that. "That's right. Oh well. As it happens, that no longer makes a difference."

"Heinie, you better let me outta these ropes this instant, or Stickybeard's gonna be awful…"

"Stickybeard?" Heinrich looked somewhat confused, then his face cleared. "Ah, yes! Ze captain! Well, the decision is somewhat out of his hands, for the moment. There isst und new captain here now."

"New… cap'n?" Abby blinked.

"Captain!" Heinrich called, back toward the dark shadow of the mast. "We haf und prisoner who does not remember you! Vill you remind her?"

Slowly, out of the shadow of the mast, into the gleaming silver of the moonlight, stepped a tall, ragged shadow. His coat hung from him in dirty rags, faint trails of wispy black beard hung from his dark face, and his two eyes burned like coals in his skeletal face. He reached a long, bony hand out, and stroked his chin as he contemplated Abby, who stared at him unbelievingly.

"Not remember me?!" Said the captain, seemingly hurt. He stretched the whole of his dark, bony skeleton of a frame to the skies and let out a loud cackling laugh. "But how kould ye fergit Ol' Black John, missie?"

* * *

**A/N**: Yeah, this chapter stinks, but I'm writing really fast. I hope to do better on the next couple ones, as there's some fun stuff that goes on. I was hoping to get in some neat interaction between the three of them, but it ended up being pretty Abby-centric. Oh well. Worked out well enough, I guess. Still…. If I have time, maybe I'll come back and rewrite it. Write me if you have ideas on how to improve it.

On that note.** REVIEW!** Hey, you've gotten this far, you might as well tell me what you thought. Don't even have to tell me who you are, you can just submit something and vanish into the internet. All manner of comments are appreciated.

I have one more picture of this: Nigel, Hoagie, and Abby fighting on the wheel. Had to draw that. I think this'll be the last. Here's the link. .com/art/Separation-1-2-and-5-69716150

Next Chapter: The pirates seek to renew the power of an ancient curse, and Abby is forced along to watch. But the Spinachian Armada also knows of the curse, and they don't plan to let it happen!


	18. Breaking the Curse

**Breaking the Curse **

* * *

  
"Black John? You're sure you heard that name right?" Nigel stared hard at the SEAL team leader.

Numbuh 20,000 snorted. "I didn't get into this job because I'm deaf, sir. They were talking right outside my cell. I heard the whole thing."

"So he's in control of the ship, then?" Nigel asked, eyes alert. "Stickybeard has been taken down?"

20,000 inclined his head. "Not… _exactly_."

* * *

Steps sounded in the dripping darkness of the hold. They were long, plodding footsteps that came on fat and reluctant feet.

The small, dark girl lashed to the beam in the center looked up, a glaring fury in her eyes. She could just hear enough of the steps to recognize the identity of the visitor, but could not see beyond the glaring radiance of the lantern hanging just above her.

Slowly, haltingly, the massive girth and bushy red hair of Stickybeard crept into the circle of light.

With a grunting sigh, he eased himself into a crouch just in front of her, avoiding her glare all the while. For a moment he sat there. He thumbed his lip. He tugged his beard. He rubbed the back of his neck. "So…" He coughed. "Er…" Taken with a sudden idea, he grabbed hold of a sucker in his beard and yanked it forth. "Burpleberry?" He proffered, holding it forth with a wide grin.

Two hazel-brown eyes burned into him.

"Er… Right." He let his hand fall to the ground. "Eh… Look now, lassie, ye have to understand…"

"Abby doesn't have to understand anything." The words came short and terse out of the dark girl's mouth. "If you're still captain, den let Abby outta here. If you ain't, well… why the heck aren't you tied up down here too?"

"It…" Stickybeard let out a wheezing sigh, again rubbing his neck. "It… ain't so easy to explain, lassie."

With a little groan he left his crouch and sat flat on the floor. "It was about three months ago, ye see." He said, toying with the sucker in his hand. "Ol' Sticky was sitting in his cabin, counting his teeth, when in the door waltzes old Black John, as easy as ye please."

Sticky frowned at the floor. "He came to me with an offer, lassie."

* * *

"So that's a problem?" Rachel glanced from one to the other, confused.

Nigel drew a breath in. "When we were trying to find the pirate base, we consulted some… uh… archival references left behind by our former teammate, in hopes she might have mentioned something critical."

"You looked in her diary?" Rachel's shoulders sagged in disbelief.

"It was the only alternative we had at the…"

"Do you have any idea how creepy that is?"

"Well, yes, but…"

"Oh my word, did you even think how she would feel about that? I mean, a diary is like a girl's private life put on display! You don't just go rooting through it to find answers to things! Why, if someone did that to…" Here Rachel stopped for some reason and reddened. "…well, never mind. But what in…."

"In any case!" Nigel continued, speaking loudly and placatingly, "We found a number of references to a 'Candy Bar', which we decided was the base. But we also found a very long entry detailing an encounter with a pirate captain named Black John. Apparently he was responsible for Heinrich's strange 'disappearance' last year."

"Oh really!" Despite herself, Rachel was interested. "The analysts are still trying to puzzle that one out, and Numbuh 5 never did file a satisfactory report."

"Yes… Well…" Nigel inclined his head. "Apparently Black John wanted Heinrich for some ceremony at a strange island in North Dakota, and took him for that purpose. He was wanted to cure Black John and his men of some curse."

"Curse?" Both 20,000 and Rachel reacted to this, earning them a strange look from 3 and 4. "What do you mean a curse?"

* * *

"An ancient pagan malediction." Spinachoza frowned at the letter in front of him. "Apparently witchcraft is afoot."

Hoagie looked up at the unexpected word. "Huh?"

Spinachoza sighed and tossed the paper over to Hoagie. "This is a dispatch from the castle. It came in the midst of the battle."

"Yeah, about that." Hoagie frowned. "Sorry about the way my ship went down so hard and swamped half the armada. I mean, it scared away the Moores…"

Spinachoza waved his hand dismissively. "I told you not to worry about that. I have talked with your men, they agree there was nothing you could have done." The two of them were sitting in the gently rocking cabin of the flagship. Spinachoza's leg was swathed in bandages and rested on a stool. "As it happens, though, that may not have been why they left. Read that."

Hoagie did so, as Spinachoza continued speaking. "It reveals the confessions of one Madam Zucchini, a certified soothsayer, who has been tried for witchcraft recently. She confesses willingly, and has given a full account of her doings." Spinachoza cracked his knuckles. "She did this without even compulsion, so perhaps the Inquisition shall be merciful. It is hard to say, however."

"Huh?" Hoagie looked up again, not exactly liking those last words.

"Regardless." Spinachoza rubbed his eyes. "Among her confessions is the matter of advising a certain personage, by the name of Black Tom, with her knowledge of heathen gods. She says he wished to be free of a curse that forced him to walk the earth as a skeleton of licorice, due to an act of greed where he had stolen all the riches of a single island." Hoagie looked up in disbelief to see Spinachoza frown. "Advising a ghost is questionable behavior to begin with, but apparently this was the ghost of a pirate captain."

"Pirate?" Hoagie's mind was bothering him. Hadn't Abby mentioned this once before?

"Yes. She gave him a mystic herb, which he was supposed to plant, in order to gain humanity again. But apparently something went wrong."

* * *

"So he never got a chance to plant it." Rachel mused. "Heinrich stole it, and then he caught Heinrich, and then Numbuh 5 rescued Heinrich. But what happened to the seed?"

"The… diary was a little fuzzy on that point." Nigel admitted.

"From what I heard from the pirates," 20,000 offered, "Apparently Heinrich hung onto it. Guarded it with his life from that day."

"And…?" Rachel prompted.

"And Black John knew it. He went to Stickybeard with an offer."

* * *

"It weren't a bad thing Black John was wanting, lassie, I'd been wanting to free Heinrich meself fer a year or so, and he was just wanting to live a normal life. Besides, the man can't die! How was I supposed to say no?"

"He offered ya the Pearly Whites, Sticky. I know about that bit." Sticky's face jolted open in surprise, but Abby's remained much the same. "Don't feed me all this stuff about being caught by surprise and all, you went with him 'cause he could offer ya teeth."

"I… It were a while ago, lassie." Sticky looked down at the floor again. "I didn't know ye would be coming to help. And me last few teeth had been on me mind a bit lately."

"You dern fool, there is no Pearly Whites!" Abby nearly stamped in frustration. "It's an ancient Aztec Legend, but there ain't no such thing! John's playing ye for a fool!"

Stickybeard seemed a little taken aback, but shook it off. "Ye can't know that. Why, the Kandy Krowns of King Kandacruchalan were legends, but they be sitting in this very cargo bay!"

"You're lying to yourself, Sticky!" Abby screamed. "Listen to me! If they'd existed, I'd know where they are!"

"And since ye don't, ye figure they can't." Sticky sneered. "Yer a smart girl, lassie, but not even ye can know all that goes on in the world. Besides," and here his shoulders slumped a little, "I had nothing to lose! Me teeth were all but gone! If it sank, I'd be none the poorer."

Abby stared at him. She tried to imagine the captain, looking upon the end of sweetness, looking upon the end of everything he had devoted his life to. Of course he would make a deal.

Quietly, she nodded. "Okay." She said. "Abby understands that. But what about now?"

* * *

"So why is this important right now?" Hoagie looked up from the paper, slightly irritated. "It says here she did all this years ago."

Spinachoza shook his head. "We captured one of the pirates. He said they pulled out not because they were losing, but because they suddenly got a new captain, with a new plan."

"New plan?" Hoagie frowned. Why couldn't Baruchli just come out with it?

Baruchli looked over at him with something like surprise. "Actually I was more interested in the new captain. But you are right, the new plan is rather… important. They wish to return to the island and complete the ceremony."

"So?" Hoagie snorted, indicating the letter. "You said it's a curse, and they're trying to get loose from it. What's wrong with that?"

"Well, there is the fact that such occult practices are directly against the Order's doctrines." Baruchli frowned. "But look at the curse in detail. It makes them skeletons, but it also makes them immortal (essentially). The seed is only guaranteed to restore the licorice to the island, make them human again, and, under ordinary circumstances, make them once more mortal."

Hoagie rolled his eyes. "Right. Isn't that part of being a human?"

"Yes." Baruchli nodded. "However, our pirate friend says the plan the captain has adopted is something of a… deviation."

* * *

"The plan originally was to just get Heinrich, take the seed from him, and use it to restore Black John and his men to life." 20,000 stated. "At least, that's what it sounded like."

"Fanny did mention Abby's report on them being interested in Heinrich." Rachel nodded. "Apparently that's why he attacked the Artic Base in the first place. Well?"

"When Heinrich came back, the captain signaled Black John, who was already on the ship, as a skeleton in the hold. Sticky'd already agreed to take the Moores over, so he figured he might as well keep on with that, but he wanted John's help." 20,000 indicated the dark sea stretching on all sides of the lightly bobbing ship. "I'm guessing they decided to ditch things once they saw they were losing."

"That would make sense." Nigel nodded. "But what are they doing now?"

* * *

"Now…" Stickybeard took a deep breath. "Things have… changed kinda sudden-like."

Abby studied him. Sticky was taking his time. Not a good sign.

"I sent to Heinie with the seed down into the hold, where I figured John could talk to him and get the seed and all." Sticky frowned. "I ain't exactly sure what happened, but somehow Heinie worked it around somehow. Black John's doing exactly whatever the boy wants, and all his men too! And me own boys… Well, ye saw how things are up there. They always did like Heinrich, and he's an old friend of theirs."

"An' not just some newcomer like Abby." Abby gritted her teeth. "Yeah, Abby sees all that, but how does that make a difference wid you?"

"Lassie, I can't help ye!" Sticky clapped a hand to his brow and stared out at her pleadingly. "I've got half a dozen immortal pirates on me ship, and me own crew is half in rebellion already!" He stepped back and glanced away. "I be cap'n now, sure, but it be cap'n in name only! If I turn the least from what me ol' cabin boy says, I have me ship torn straight out from under me!"

* * *

"On the way up, I heard all the pirates talking." Rachel spoke slowly. "They were saying something about a promise that Heinrich had started just making to 'the new guys--',

"Black John and his men" 20,000 nodded.

"--but had somehow extended to the whole crew."

Nigel's eyes shot over to her. "What kind of promise?"

She shrugged, a hint of distress on her face. "Not sure. But it must've been pretty big, because as far as I know, only one disagreed, and they threw him overboard. Hate to think what they'd do to anyone else who disagreed. But with that kinda support, what could anyone do?"

* * *

"You could loosen these ropes." Abby spoke slowly, calmly. "You could leave a little dagger down here and just walk away. No one would know about it."

Stickybeard looked at her, stroked his beard, moved forward, and moved back. "I…" He shook his head. "I… I just can't…" He coughed awkwardly. "John… he might… lassie, I got me teeth…"

"Dang it, Sticky, Abby told you already, them Pearly Whites is just a legend!" Abby exploded with impatience. "Yer selling yer soul for a chance that don't exist!"

Sticky took another step back. He looked at her once more, and bit a lip, thinking hard as his thick fingers toyed with his sticky, sugar-clotted beard, covered in it's assortment of caramels, suckers, peppermints, and gum blobs.

He ran his tongue over his teeth, his few remaining teeth that hung to his jaw, and he shook his head. "I… I… I be truly sorry, lassie." He said, and fled.

"But why does Abby have to stay down here!?" Abby screamed at the steps retreating into the darkness. "And what's all so important about this plan of Heinie's?"

* * *

"The prisoner says that the new pirate captain has someone else to help him now." Baruchli frowned at his sandaled feet. "Someone who understands the ways of the Aztecs who put the curse in the first place. Someone who thinks he can alter the terms of the curse to his own purposes"

Hoagie groaned. He noted, for the first time, how much a dramatic streak Baruchli had. His head was reeling with crashing ships and turning wheels and eyes of old freinds that glared at you over cold sunglasses, and his mind was only half-interested in this rather mundane matter of pirates and witchcraft. Why couldn't Baruchli simply get on with it? And where on earth was Vespinachuci?

"Apparently," Barcuhli droned on, "they plan to return to the island and repeat the ceremony, except with the slight difference of somehow avoiding the mortality part of the curse."

Baruchli paused before continuing, in the most placid voice imaginable, "Essentially, they will make themselves both human, _and_ immortal, and then probably go on to lay waste to the world as we know it."

Hoagie's eyes shot open.

"Being immortal, it will be essentially impossible for anyone to stop them." Baruchli pointed out.

* * *

"We need to follow them, at once!" Nigel turned to the control panel, and began to flip switches.

Rachel's gloved hand came out and stopped him.

"Nigel." She said. "We can't. This ship is only made to carry two people, and we have at least eight onboard. We're barely staying afloat."

Nigel stared at her.

"And we can't really signal headquarters either, because neither of us are supposed to be here." She pointed out.

Nigel groaned and let his head fall onto the control panel. "Why didn't we take a SCAMPER?" He moaned.

* * *

There was a silence in the rocking cabin. Nothing could be heard except the creak of timbers.

Hoagie finally spoke. "So, what're we going to do?"

* * *

No one said anything for a bit, simply watching Nigel. Finally, Numbuh 4 spoke up.

"So wot are we gonna do, anyway? This is kinda boring."

* * *

Abby sat for a long time in the quiet darkness, listening to the drip of water from the rafters. She listened for the pirates above. She listened for the cries of argument, the clash of swords and battle.

She listened for the sound of repentant footsteps, descending the ladder to set her free.

But none came.

Quietly, slowly, terribly, the skinny frame of the small black girl began to shake convulsively. Her head slumped down, and her shoulders heaved up and down, as two thin rivers of ice traced their way down from her immovable eyes.

"What is Abby gonna do?" She whispered to the darkness, and received no answer.

* * *

"Do?" Baruchli looked up. "Oh. Yes, I see. Well, we cannot simply allow the pirates to complete the ceremony, so we will call out the Armada(or what is left of it), and attack them at the island."

"How're we gonna do that?" Hoagie didn't know if he liked the sound of this plan.

Baruchli shrugged. "Wait until they are all on the island, and then bombard it into oblivion. It should be sufficient to kill them all."

"All?" Hoagie looked up. "We're planning to kill them all?"

"We must." A curt nod came from the priest. "Any survivors would be immensely dangerous."

"But there might be good people among them!" Hoagie sat up straight in his seat, the letter falling unheeded to the floor. "Misguided people, friendless people, people who don't even know what everyone is doing!"

"People who, willing or not, will be free to loot and plunder the world unless we stop them!" Baruchli turned on him with a burning stare.

"B… But…" Hoagie gestured helplessly. "what… what about… they have… There could be girls…kids among them there! We can't just…"

"We MUST!" Baruchli's voice silenced him immediately. "Listen to me, holy brother. I do not make this decision lightly. The pirates have Captain Vespinachuci with them. They captured him during the battle and doubtless have him imprisoned aboard their ship even now. Our barrage will likely kill him as well as they."

Hoagie froze at this new information.

"Captain Vespinachuci is a dear friend of mine of many years, but I know that were he to know of our predicament, he would urge us to attack, rather than loose the world to the pirates!" Baruchli closed his eyes. "I do not wish this, brother, but I have no choice!"

Hoagie said nothing, but simply stared at the floor, thinking.

"The fleet sails tomorrow." Baruchli pushed away from the table. "We will immediately pursue the pirates and surround the island. Fortunately, we now have the location, from Madame Zucchini's confession."

"Shall I prepare my ship?" Hoagie spoke to the floor.

"No." Baruchli straightened upon his feet. "Return to the castle and repair. Your ship has suffered many damages. It must be made safe."

"Yes, Holy Father." Hoagie nodded, quietly, obediently.

Baruchli winced. "I have told you." He opened the door. "Do not call me that. No one is holy, save God."

"Father?" The query stopped the tall priest as he prepared to step out the door. The small, fat monk seemed to be deep in thought. "Do you know how they plan to accomplish this ceremony?"

The priest shrugged. "I do not know. Experience would lend me to guess at a human sacrifice of some kind, probably female."

And he passed into the billowing night.

* * *

"Well," Rachel leaned forward and pressed some buttons on the console. "Our engine still works, so even if we can't fly, we can still move in the water. But we'll have to go slow, because the ship's not exactly built for sea travel, and we don't want to sink her."

"That won't get us there in time to do anything." A frown creased across Nigel's face.

Rachel straightened up and locked eyes with him. "It's better than not getting there at all."

Nigel shrugged. "Good point."

* * *

It was dark and quiet deep in the bowels of the ship. A dim light filtered from the top of the steps, faintly outlining the form of the iron cage and the massive man inside. His head hung over as if no longer possessed of strength, and his arms hung useless at his sides.

He did not change position for the soft patter of sandaled feet, nor for the gentle creak of the door as it swung open, nor even for the awkward clearing of throat that signaled the newcomer wished to speak.

"Um… Hi." Brother Hoagie Gilligan shifted his feet on the rough wooden floor. This was much more difficult than he had thought. "You're the pirate we caught, right?"

There was little movement from the dark form of the giant, but a sound did come forth. "Yes."

"Great!" Hoagie smiled, rubbing his hands nervously. He cast a glance over his shoulder. He had little time, he knew. "Uh… listen." He decided for a direct approach. "I need your help for a little… something."

The pirate still showed no sign.

"I've got this… uh… friend… back on the pirate ship, who I think might be in trouble." Hoagie pressed his hands together, studying the ends of his chubby fingers religiously. "And I want to go help her. But I…"

"Are you talking about miss Abigail?" The head lifted up rather suddenly.

"Uh… well…" Hoagie reminded himself not to be so direct in the future. "Yeah, I guess so. But how do you…?"

The pirate's huge form lumbered into the light. "Missus Abby was nice. She wasn't mean, like everybody else. Is she in trouble?"

As he heard the words of the simple question echo in his eardrums, Hoagie suddenly felt very small, and somewhat afraid. "I…" He hesitated. "I think so. But I need your help to go find her. Will you…?"

"She was real nice." Nodded the giant pirate. "If she's in trouble them… then I'll… I'll help ya, for what you need."

"Great!" Hoagie smiled. This had been easier than what he'd thought. "Okay, now follow me, mister, uh… what's your name again?"

"Long John Stupid." Came the answer, as they crept out of the door together.

* * *

**A/N**: Weehaa! I'm actually getting this more or less done! I think I'll miss the launch date for the shows, but that can't be helped, really. I think they'll be three or four more chapters, and that's it. My many thanks to all who read, reviewed, and generally tagged along so far here. I'll try to have another update on Thursday.

Again, **REVIEW!!!** I crave reviews! Reviews of any kind! Positive, Negative, Constructive, Red, Yellow, Black, or White, send 'em at me! Let me know!

**Next Chapter**: Oblivion threatens both sides, and the Kids Next Door are powerless to help. What can Hoagie do, with no crew except one man of doubtful intelligence?


	19. Drawing Lines

**Drawing Lines**

* * *

"Perhaps you wish me to confess you, _senorita_? I am not a holy man myself, but perhaps…"

"Fergit it, baby."

"But in such a…

"Abby said to forget it!"

The other finally fell silent, and Abby breathed a sigh of relief. She had no idea who the olive-drab man in the goofy clothes was, or why they'd pulled him onto the island shore with her and the others, but ever since they'd plopped him down next to her by the tree, the man had down nothing but talking about confessions and last rites.

For some crazy reason, the man seemed to think they were about to die.

"Please, senorita, I do indeed think…"

"An' I think you should shut up!"

That was the other thing. The man kept calling her a sea-noor-eetah, whatever that was supposed to be. It was immensely distracting, especially while Abby was doing her level best to decide what exactly Heinie was doing by that hill in the center. He appeared to be drawing lines in the sand, but surely there must be more to it than that.

She simply had to find out what this plan of Heinie's was, and if none of the pirates would tell her, she would simply have to find out for herself. So far, all she knew is that the symbols he was drawing were Aztec in origin. But that didn't tell her much. Goodness knew there were enough spells the Aztecs could do.

Off to the side, she could see Stickybeard nervously fumbling with his beard. The paunchy candy pirate had been avoiding her gaze all day, and she didn't suppose that was going to change with time. Black John stood next to Heinie, studying the runes carefully, nodding as if he understood it all. The rest of the crew congregated in a disturbed crowd around the hill.

"_Muchacha_, it is most dangerous to enter the second life without first confessing one's…"

"Shut up!"

Try as she might, Abby could not see Long John Stupid anywhere. _Where the heck is he?_

* * *

"Where did you say this island was?" Hoagie bent over the chart, studying it closely. Outside he could hear the thunderous roar of the propellers, churning the air violently. "We need to make as straight a course for it as we can, if we want to beat the Armada there."

Long John kept glancing out the window, clearly uncomfortable with the whole "flying" thing. "The cap'n said it was somewheres off the coast of North Dakota." He offered. "Umm… Does this… this here ship… does she… go very fast?"

"Of _course_ she does!" Hoagie raised his chin in indignation. "Well…" He lowered it and sighed. "Okay. Not really fast. Not as fast as a SCAMPER, or anything. But she goes a lot faster than the rest of the Armada, I'll tell you that much, and a lot straighter. But the Armada left a little bit before I let you out of that cell, and at least a couple hours before we managed to get the whole ship in working order. They've got a good headstart on us."

"Uh-huh." Long John nodded, but he was clearly not thinking about that. "Does… does she tend to stay… up? While she's going so fast?"

"Oh yeah." Hoagie grinned. "Awesome, huh? So long as the hamsters down below keep running around in their little wheels, we should be fine."

John gulped. "Yes…Yessir."

Hoagie turned back to the map, his mind working rapidly. "Okay. North Dakota. We can work with that. Now, while we're just flying like this, it shouldn't be a problem, but when we get there, we're going to have to do some dodging, and for that, I'm going to need your help." Hoagie looked absentmindedly over the gauges. The repairs he'd made had been extremely sparse, and hardly enough to keep the ship flying. That one wheel…

"Kin I do anything right now, Cap'n?" The giant behind him shuffled his feet awkwardly.

"Oh!" Hoagie thought about that a minute. "Sure. Go down to the bottom decks and toss out a few cannons. It should lighten the ship and make it easier for us to get there."

The huge pirate played about with the end of his nose for a moment, nodded, and disappeared out the door.

Hoagie sighed as the door slammed shut. He seriously doubted they could get there much before the Armada, and completely doubted whether they would be able to do anything once they got there. What was he supposed to do, dodge past the whole Armada, land on an island full of pirates, dodge in there, run up to Numbuh 5, and say _Hey, I think these friends of yours are planning to sacrifice you?_

Hoagie rubbed the back of his neck. _Something like that, I guess_. He let out a nervous chuckle.

* * *

Aztec. Abby thought to herself. What kinda Aztec spells would Heinie know? And that in some kinda circular pattern? Something to do with the licorice that used to be on the island, probably, but what kinda…

"Once more I implore you, senorita, to consider! At the least allow me to…"

Abby sighed, and stopped the man with a glare. The two had more or less worked out a system by this time.

She went back to studying the circle. Circles were usually involved in group ceremonies, ones that spread out in all directions. There was a little hill in the middle, where she supposed they were going to plant the seed, and jutting out at various angles were a few twisting lines. She really wished she could see more of it.

Especially of this one line that went right up to them and onto the tree. _That_ one bothered her.

"Perhaps even a few small words of solace…"

"Shut it, baby."

Abby leaned back and thought a moment. Once more she looked over the crowd. Nough and Latier seemed to be in some kind of argument. Bubbleosa was talking to one of the skeletons. Stickybeard… She couldn't see him. Good riddance anyway.

Two pirates near the front were talking. A few words floated over to her.

"…I was just happy to be human, but immortal? We kin go wherever we wants! Take any candy, and eat anyting!"

"Arr." The other agreed. "That be a truth. I can't want to go out again on the sea, feeling the sun on me face… Y'know? Like old times? It seems a century since I tasted something other than licorice."

There was a pause, and then… "It _has_ been a century, ye fool."

"Whatever." The other snorted. "A few more minutes, and years won't account for nothing no more."

"But what about…" The voices descended into some discussion of gambling debts and interest.

Immortality. Abby frowned. The human part had been obvious, but the immortality? What kinda ceremony would take a curse and make ya…

Hang on. Aztecs. Ceremony. Immortality. Curse.

Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

Oh no.

"Please, _Senorita_, may I at the very least pray for your soul along with mine?"

"Uhh…" Abby frowned a minute. "Yeah. Abby thinks you'd better."

* * *

"Ship to Port!" Came the call from the lumbering giant at the head of the ship.

Hoagie yanked at a lever and twisted a few knobs, his pudgy hands a frantic blur of motion. "Tilt the awning a few hooks up!" He yelled in the bullhorn.

Cannonballs whistled lazily about them, ripping holes in canvas, shredding paths across the ship's wooden sides, smashing deep into the vessel's thick underside.

Any notions Hoagie _had_ had about fighting the armada had been dashed about five seconds into the battle. A full broadside from foremost ship had turned most of the lower deck into shreds. The cannons were completely unusable.

The propellers, by some miracle, were still functioning. The Spinachians were much better shots than the Pirates, but so far, no crucial devices had been hit. Hoagie was pulling out every single pilot trick he knew to dodge the fire, but the ship just simply wasn't built for it.

"Ship to Starboard!" Came the call.

"Which side is that!? Left or Right!?" Hoagie screamed in the bullhorn.

There was an ominous thud below, and the floor shook.

"Right." Hoagie nodded, slightly panting. "Right side."

* * *

Abby had been struggling for some time now, and the ropes were just as tight as ever. Tighter, if possible. And now, one of them was holding her arms in a _really_ annoying position. Maybe if she could rub it against the tree behind them…

The dark man beside her spoke up, for the first time in a while. "Is there anything you wish me to do, to prepare for what is coming?"

The tree had uncommonly smooth bark. Drat. Abby stopped and looked at him. "If you don't mind, Abby'd much rather simply try to find a way to escape it all."

The man shrugged. "Very well, senorita."

"Abby has a name, y'know." Her hands groped about on the ground. No stones.

"Ah. Abby." The man's dark form bowed, as much as it could, anyway, with the ropes. "And I am called Amerigo Vespinachuci."

"Abby thought you looked familiar." Maybe if she fiddled around with the knots a little… "Ain't you the idiot who took over the school that one time?"

Amerigo bowed his head. "Indeed so. One of many acts in my life."

The knots weren't budging. Maybe something else. "Awful stupid if you ask Abby."

"_Muchacha_, do you know who you remind me of?" Amerigo asked, with astonishing irrelevance.

Abby looked up from feeling at loose bark fragments. "Not really."

"You remind me of my sister." Amerigo stared off into the darkness. Abby shrugged and continued at her work, but the man kept going. "Stubborn, headstrong. She was… how you say… Passionate, yes?" She caught just the hint of a laugh from him. "Of course, she have only six years when last I see her, but…"

"Six years?" Abby grunted. She had gone back to the tree idea. "Well, how old is she now?"

"She died." The answer came quietly, painlessly from the man's lips, but something compelled Abby to look around sharply. He was still staring at the pirates milling about the hill. "She killed by Moores, many years ago."

Abby looked at him for a good moment. "Sorry ta hear that." She commented, turning back to the tree.

"She killed with my mother." Amerigo did not seem to have heard. "In our home. My father, he gone, but I, oldest, I should have… the responsibility is mine…"

The tree was being no help at all. She shook her head. "Look, baby, this ain't the time for a therapy session, okay? Sorry to hear about it, and all, but… Aw, fergit it." She began to fumble with the knots. "Probably not much you could do about it anyway."

"I could have died." Came the quiet answer. "I could have tried harder to defend them. And even if my mother and sister are not my fault, my brother is."

"Brother, huh?" _Man_, these knots were just _impossible_! Who on earth tied them? "How'zat?"

The silence that greeted her question was a little strange. Abby didn't pay much attention to it at first, but as she gave up finally on the knots and realized that Amerigo still hadn't said anything, she looked up at him.

His face was still, and his eyes were stone, but the long black beard that jutted from his chin was trembling in an odd manner. His gaze was locked out somewhere, past the stars above.

"Yes." He said finally, and yet did not really seem to be answering Abby. "Yes, it is good that I should tell you." He blinked a few times and then turned his eyes down towards her. "I should tell you." He nodded. "Never have I said this, not to the holy Father, not to my men, not to my own priest in my darkest penance. But death, she comes, and I would not go to face the Spinach with my sins unconfessed."

Abby lifted an eyebrow, but she had no time to comment, for the strange man began again to speak.

"My family, they die, I tell you this, yes? But not all dead. My brother, he only baby, he playing in basement when house burn down." The man's dark eyes blinked again, but kept on. "I wake up, I find him, crying in house, I take him away, to Madrid."

Amerigo let a smile lift his face a moment, but it was quickly stifled. "Madrid, she is seaport, you understand? I find small room there, take small jobs lifting things, loading ships. I take care of my brother. He grow big, strong, follow me around everywhere."

_Heh. _ Abby thought to herself. _Sounds like Hoagie and his little bro… _She stopped, a thought striking her.

"For time… is good life, you understand? I like to live, to help my brother, to show him how things are, in the world. I like to see him grow big, see him do his own jobs, take care of ship while I gone, all that." Amerigo let another frail smile cross his face. "I like… for a time."

His head dipped down in a sigh and came back up, a stern, determined frown on his face. "But as I get older… things… change." He took in a deep breath. "One does not always want to be followed around. One wants to be one's own man, go out, meet girls, meet friends. My brother… he becomes a pest."

Abby was listening. She wasn't even checking the knots anymore.

"So I leave him behind. I go out, I do things with my friends." He sighed. "I live my own life. I forget that I am Jose', the son of a murdered mother, the brother of Maria and Juan. No, I am a man, my own man! I woo women, I earn money, I..." Amerigo's face contorted strangely, but he mastered it. "I drink. I drink much. And I forget."

_It's like… candy's the only thing that makes life happy sometimes, you know? It helps you forget all the problems you have._ Abby heard a voice echoing in her head.

"But my brother… he worry. He worry bad. And I know he right, but…" Amerigo shook his head. "I not want to face it. I not want to stop, to remember, because is so much easier to forget."

He bent his head, staring at the ground. "One day." He said. "My friend, Josef. He come to me, with position on ship. I can take, earn much money, have good time with my friends." Amerigo shrugged. "I half-drunk already. Job gets me money to buy more. I go where no one knows me, and where I know no one." Amerigo sighed. "I escape my past. I escape my brother. I escape myself."

"So you took the job, huh?"

"I took job." Amerigo's words came out a little faster now. "I took job, I escape brother, I escape myself, the Jose', but, oooh, I no escape past. My past, she haunts me. She haunts me with burning dreams of my mother, of my sister. And she haunts me with images of my brother, staring mournfully at me, as he starves to death in the gutter." Amerigo's words came out in a shuddering sigh. "I drink to escape the nightmares, but still they come. Still they cluster. Drink empties me into oblivion, but when I awake from it, they are there." There came a curious, gulping noise from him.

"Perhaps I would still do so, if I not drafted into Spinachian Armada. The holy Father, he speak to us, about redemption, and works, and I see my way." His head lifted up, a curious gleam in his eyes. "I no longer be Jose', no longer be drunk. I be Amerigo, and I not try to forget. I remember. I keep in my mind all I have done, all I have failed, so that when it comes again, I _no_ fail."

"You see…" He turned his gaze onto Abby, and she could not help be struck by the burning passion in his eyes. "I no allow myself to forget what I am. My sister, my mother, they killed by Moores. My brother…" Amerigo gave a grim smile. "I… kill him."

Nothing but silence greeted the Spanish Captain. Abby looked at him, and stared, and all around them the meaningless crowd of pirates.

"So it is fitting that now I die."

* * *

Hoagie was running around on the lower decks popping water bottles into drink dispensers when he heard the loud, cracking sound.

His eyes grew wide. "Uh-Oh." He dropped his load, bottles scattering in all directions, and grabbed onto a pole as the floor beneath his feet began to swiftly tilt. Brooms, boards, splinters, bottles came tumbling past his feet as he struggled upwards toward the ladder and climbed sideways out.

Popping his head out onto the deck, Hoagie sighed as he saw a large wheel roll down the deck and smash its way through the railing. "Eh. Figured that'd break." He looked a little disappointed. "Oh well. Fun while it lasted."

He glanced up. Long John was reeling about on the deck, grabbing frantically at ropes. "Oops. Hey, Long John!"

The pirate twisted around and threw him a hasty salute. "Hey, cap'n! The one big wheel thingie broke, and…"

"Yeah, yeah!" Hoagie nodded. "Okay… ah… You just get beneath decks, and hang onto something!" He looked about. "I'll… I'll… Hmmm…" He looked about. "Shoot, I'm not sure what I'm going to do about this."

* * *

Neither one had said anything for a while. Abby apparently had given up on the whole rope thing, and they were both now dumbly studying the ceremony going on in the middle. Amerigo simply sat, staring at the dark circle of the trees.

At long last, Abby broke the silence, clearing her throat in an unnessecarily loud manner. "As… as long as we be doin' confessions and all… do ya mind if Abby lets somethin' off her mind?"

Amerigo started slightly and looked over at her. "By all means." He smiled.

"Abby… Abby don't have a lot to say…" The small girl stared at the ground in a furious manner. Her teeth were unmercifully biting her lip. "She ain't done a lot with her life, y'know? But… well, she's got some things that she'd like to get off her chest."

Amerigo said nothing. He simply watched her.

"Abby used to have an older sister." Abby frowned. "Well, still does, Abby guesses. They used to hang out and do all sorts of fun stuff together, an' Abby followed her everywhere."

"But… after a while… Abby's sis didn't want to play with her so much anymore. She wuz always talking about dances, and cell-phones, and boys." A chuckle interrupted her, and she gulped it back. "It's… it's kinda funny, really, but Abby didn't really like that. She tried to follow her around still. She didn't see why her sis should play with anyone, except her." Abby looked up at the sky, still smiling, but her eyes strangely shimmering. "She tried to own her sister."

"Well… Of course… Abby's sis didn't take to that too kindly. She told Abby to stay away. And Abby didn't take that too kindly either." There was another gulping chuckle. "So Abby started hanging out with a new group of kids too, just to show her sis she didn't need her."

"It… it wasn't really hanging out, though, you know?" Abby lowered her head. "She was just making friends to show she could. To show up her sis. And also… kinda cause it was what her sis had done." She raised her head, and gave her hair a little toss backwards. "Abby didn't… well, she liked all her friends, sure, but… she didn't really try to help them, or figure it out, or anything. She just played games like her sis had done, and that was it."

"There was some… she was kinda friends with." Abby smiled again. "I mean… Numbuh 4 was kinda neat just cause he was so stupid, and Numbuh three was… well, you'd have to know her." She grinned up at Amerigo, who did not respond. "And Numbuh 1 always had all sorts of great ideas on what to do, and he was really cool. Hey, Abby even kinda had a crush on him, once." This emitted a diseased giggle, that slowly died in the consuming silence. "Though that was a while back. And Numbuh 2… heh." Abby smiled. "He was fun. He was always needin' Numbuh 5 to rescue him, and he was always trying to help Numbu… Abby…, too, in different ways. He knew her sis and he was always thinking of all sorts of new stuff. And he was duuuumb, too." She started a chuckle again, but it ended in a sigh.

"But…" Abby shook her head. "Abby didn't really try to help a lot. She didn't really try to be friends, she just hung out. And that was it. They was supposed to be there, they were supposed to be friends. They was supposed to make her feel better. She…" Abby frowned. "She kinda just wanted to use her friends, too. As security pillows, or somethin'."

"_Muchacha_." Breathed the tall gentleman next to her. "I think you blame yourself too much."

"So one time." Abby took a breath. "Abby had a mission. She went off, became another person, lived another life. An' she realized she could fergit about her sis, become a whole new person. And her friends tried to stop her, tried to keep her from doin' it."

"And… and Abby didn't really take that too kindly. She yelled at them, and called them a whole bunch of things that wasn't true." Abby was still smiling, but it was at the ground, and tears were slipping down her cheeks. "And she told them to go away."

"See…" It came out with the same gulping sound. "Ever since her sis… y'know. Abby'd always been trying to be cool by herself. Always do everything without help. Be the strong one, the one who don't need help, y'know? The person who's always right, always strong, always cool. So she didn't want no help from anybody."

"So that why you tell your friends to go?"

"Yeah." Abby nodded, her head close to the ground. "An…. And now…" She lifted her head up a little, and she licked her lips. "Abby'd just wish… for once…" A gulp was bit back in her throat. "She just wishes… someone'd come to help her out…"

There was another long silence. The tall nobleman stared sadly down at the quivering form of the small girl tied beside him. Heinrich cast a suspicious glance down at them and them kept at his work.

Finally, Abby raised her head, and though her eyes were dry, her cheeks were not.

"So." She said, in a flat, emotionless tone. "Abby been trying to use people's lives ever since she's known them, and she never wanted to use her own to help anyone."

Another pause.

"Kinda ironic, then, that she's gonna lose it after all, ain't it?"

* * *

Father Spinachoza closed his eyes as the flying behemoth tumbled furiously down through the air, turning and wheeling in a most sickening fashion. "Brother Hoagie…" He whispered. "I told you to stay away…"

"Holy Father." Baruchli turned to the captain at his side. "The airship is crashing onto the island. There are two ships anchored there already."

Baruchli nodded. "Then the pirates have beaten us to here."

"Yes, holy father." The captain bowed. "Holy Father, if the exalted Brother Hoagie is now on the island as well, should we not…"

"No." Baruchli shook his head. "He knew the risks when he took the ship, and we are out of time already. As soon as we are in range, we must fire."

* * *

**A/N**: NO, this is NOT the end. The finishing chapter will wrap up the action tomorrow, I hope, before 8:30 (Not that it makes much difference.) I will probably also write out an Epilogue sometime next week.

Again, REVIEW!! YEEEHA! PLEASE! These recent chapters haven't been getting as much feedback, but I can't tell if that's cause they're going so close together, or cause they stink. If they do, by all means, tell me!

**Next Chapter**: Oh, just read it tomorrow, for crying out loud!


	20. Crossing Over

**A/N:** Quick insertion here to say how very, very sorry I am for the inexplainable delay in updates. I realize my last entry said this chapter would be up on Friday, and that it is now Wednesday. Well, I must plead the intervention of life, and that is all I can say. Something very unexpected came up on Friday, and I had to forego this, and this chapter took a lot longer than I thought.

This chapter will mark the end of the action proper. There will be one short epilogue after this, and that will be all. Thanks to all of you who've read so far!

* * *

**Crossing Over**

* * *

Coughing and choking, Hoagie stumbled out of the head cabin. He took a look at the shattered frame of his ship, at the twisted and broken awning. Even some of the propellers, facing out toward the smooth surface of the ocean, were broken off, though most seemed to have survived well enough. 

"Great!" Hoagie smirked. "No problem at all! Unless…" A frown crossed his face, and he began to run, then suddenly stopped as he remembered something. "Hey! Uh… John!? You okay!?"

From somewhere down below came a feeble moan that vaguely resembled a "yes, Cap'n."

"Good!" Hoagie beamed, jogging over to the hole and pearing about. Gears, wheels, belts… Hmmm, some broken, but it still should work. How much time… He cast a look out to sea. "Hey John? Are the hamsters okay?"

Again, an affirmative moan.

"Good, good!" Hoagie rubbed his hands. "Oh, Awesome! And are the wheels all together?"

A somewhat less affirmative moan. The pirate seemed to be in doubt, some were broken, some whole, some simply cracked.

"Oh, whatever." Hoagie frowned contemplatively. "It should be enough. Good thing I managed to get that emergency parachute harness all rigged, huh?"

A _much_ more affirmative moan.

"Okay, John, we gotta get moving! The armada's gonna be here in a few minutes, and we're gonna have to be outta here by then!" Hoagie jumped down, eying the escaped hamsters and a rather dazed John, who lay in a tangled pile of wood and hamster feed. "Here. Just let me set a few things, and then we need to go."

John stumbled somewhat slowly to his feet, as Hoagie dug out an alarm clock and carefully adjusted it on a shattered window pane. John studied his captain carefully. "Wha… Whatcha doin' that for, cap'n?"

"Hmmmm?" Hoagie turned around. "Oh! Oh… uh… nothing, nothing…" He smirked just a little. "C'mon, we gotta get a move on."

* * *

Numbuh 4 frowned darkly at the engine. "You _shoor_ that thing can't go any faster?" He asked. 

Rachel looked back, a trifle annoyed. "I believe you've asked me already, and yes, I'm sure. The boats' rocking enough as it is."

"At ease, Numbuh 4." Numbuh 1 did not turn, but the command in his voice was inherent. "Believe me, we're doing all we can with this. Numbuh 20,000's plan was a great help, but still…"

"Are they gonna be okay?" Numbuh 3 straightened up from the rear, rubbing her eyes sleepily. "We left them a long ways back, and…"

"They'll be fine." Rachel nodded. "They're going to radio headquarters and ask for pickup. Then they'll feed them a story about how they managed to escape the pirates and all that."

Wally frowned. "Kinda scary how quick Numbuh 20,000 took to that plan."

"He's a Black Op." Rachel turned back to the front with a shrug. "Comes with the territory."

* * *

Amerigo glanced over quickly as he heard Abby heave a huge sigh. She caught his look and smiled weakly. Neither had spoken much since the "confession" a few moments ago. Heinrich seemed in doubt over a number of runes at a certain point, and the pirates were starting to mutter. 

"Problem, _muchacha_?" He asked, with a gentle smile of his own.

"Eh… Not really." Abby gave out a good-natured grimace. "Just thinking."

"Such as?"

"Eeeh… just what I've been doing." Abby took a deep breath. "See, it was just… I got taken up with all my new friends too much. They seemed so friendly, so kind, ready to let ya do whatever you want, so long as you let them do whatever they want." She sighed. "Jest… complete freedom, you know? The only thing you had to do was trust and love your friends."

"It was… it was so completely different from what I usedta do. There, I had to watch all sorts of things, obey all kinds rules. I could do it well enough, its just… Abby never was much one for rules."

Amerigo raised an eyebrow but he was not given a chance to comment, for Abby kept right on going. "There ain't nothing wrong with that, mind you. At least," she smirked, "Abby don't think so. Sometimes there's just parts where the rules stink, and ya just gotta go on your own, ya know?" She smiled encouragingly at the admiral, who did not seem so certain. "But… I think I went along too much."

Abby stared at the ground, half thoughtfully, half lost in some disconlate train of thought. "See… rules stink sometime, yeah, but… a lot of time people do too." She let out a strangled chuckle. "That's what I wasn't getting. I figured I could trust these people, that they were my friends, that we… that I didn't need to worry about rules. Just so long as we do what we like and don't hurt anyone, we should be fine, right?"

"Wrong." Amerigo smiled at her. "This what I think too, once. What I once do, when playing with my brother, when leaving him later, when drinking to forget, I do because it is what I feel is the best thing… for me. That is why I join up with Spinach Armada so quickly. I think, I kill brother by my lack of control, so ever I live under my own control again."

Abby nodded. "Heh. Least you learned it in time to do something." She looked out at Heinrich who was going back to work. "Abby's seein' a whole bunch of things she didn't think about before, and she ain't gonna be able to do a lick about it."

* * *

"So, uh, cap'n…." Long John Stupid was obviously trying to whisper, but also obviously failing. "What're we doing here?" 

Hoagie looked back with a quizzical frown. "Rescuing my friends. I told you that already. Sheesh."

"Right, right…." John looked about, puzzled. "So… why aren't the rest of your soldiers helping us?"

As Hoagie made no response, John kept right on going. "I mean… shouldn't you have a lot of soldiers here, backing you up and all?" His brow furrowed in confusion. "Come to think of it, why were they firing at us?" He looked over. "Uhhh… sir?"

Hoagie turned around and shrugged lightheartedly. "I quit the Spinachian Armada."

"Why'd you do that?" John hurried after him as they approached the line of trees.

"Ehh…" Hoagie shrugged, pearing through the tight network of bramble. "Couldn't really handle it, to be honest. I mean," He sighed and turned around. "all those guys in there are _sooo_ into duty. They've got all sorts of ceremonies and traditions and stuff… you can't hardly breathe without doing something wrong."

"Why'd you join in the first place then?" Long john was looking very puzzled.

"It was a job." Hoagie shrugged. "I have to do missions command gives me."

"Cause it's your duty?"

"Well…." Hoagie ran a hand through his hair and gave it up. "Okay. So maybe I didn't leave completely because of that. I left… well… it's kinda hard to explain." He frowned.

"Okay, first off, Baruchli's an awesome guy." Hoagie looked pleadingly at the big pirate. "He's a great guy. I've hardly met anyone as devoted to what he does as that guy is—well, maybe one guy." Unbidden, there flashed through his mind a picture of a bald head and a pair of sunglasses. "And… I kinda like all the ceremonies, once I'm at the top. I get to feel important, and that's not something I get to do a lot."

"But…" Hoagie frowned at the ground. "The thing with Baruchli and the others is… they… they're… I just… They forget all about the people while they're trying to do their duty." He looked over at the pirate again and only got a puzzled frown. "They get so wrapped up in the greater good that they forget they're talking about people and not pawns and…. Eh, forget it…" He brushed it off and moved forward. "Anyway. It's just… Maybe they were right, but I just couldn't… I couldn't take the terms they were working with."

"Why, what…?" But Hoagie waved Long John into silence.

"Look," he grinned, pointing. "Pirates. Now all we gotta do is just find out where Numb… where Abby is."

* * *

"Hey! Bring him back here! What'cha gonna do with him anyway!?" Abby shouted furiously, struggling futilely against the ropes. 

Bubblosa, one of the two pirates pulling Amerigo from the tree, shook his head ruefully. "Sorry missus, but the cap'n says he wants the Spic away from the tree."

"Worry not,_muchacha_." Came Amerigo's calm voice. "I am ready to face whatever fate has been prepared for me!"

"But Amerigo…" Abby glared in frustration at the group. "That ain't…"

"It is my privilege to know you for short time! Adios!"

"That ain't… Abby sighed as the tiny knot of sailors disappeared into the crowd. "…what Abby's worried about." She shook her head_. Kinda selfish of Abby anyway_. She mused, eyeing the line that ran past her to the tree. _Suppose Abby oughta be glad…_ a soft chuckle escaped her. _ …oughta be glad that tall and dark over there is getting clear of the whole…_

_Aw, shucks._

_Abby don't care if that Amo, or whoever, is getting out or not! She don't care if he's getting out alive, or if they're taking him to do something else! _A sigh exploded out of her with the fury of helpless desperation._ She just wants someone here to talk to, for crying out_ _loud_!

Slowly, the girl's skinny body slumped over in defeat. Unbidden, tears swelled in her eyes, dripping to the ground.

Strangely, inexplicably, her thoughts turned to the last time she had been captured by the pirates. Her mind ran over their first meeting with the buccaneers, with how she had handled it, what had happened, how she had been captured…

"Achtung!" A sharp, clear call drew everyone's attention to the hill.

…and how the chubby arm had shot out of the sky to save her.

Heinrich waved his arms impressively. "Ve are nearly ready to begin!"

A whisper broke from Abby's lips. "Hoagie…"

* * *

"There she is!" Hoagie nearly giggled with relief. "Oh good, this shouldn't take much longer." Up on the hill, the one fat kid was yelling something about polar alignment or something like that. 

"Whatta we gonna do about the hundred thousand skeleton-people all standing around?" John whispered thunderously in his ear.

"Uh…." Hoagie frowned. "Oh. Good point" He leant forward. "Welll. Hmm… This could be a little more difficult. Maybee…." He thought hard a moment, then suddenly brightened. "We can creep up, and then shoot through the ropes from behind! Or cut them or something!"

"Yeah!" Long John nodded enthusiastically. "And then… she'll be all ready for us, and we can all just jump up and run out!"

"Oh." Hoagie frowned. "Rats." He looked up at Long John with a glare. "How come just when I get a plan going, you gotta come in with reality and spoil it?"

John looked down in confusion. "Huh?"

* * *

Polar alignment… so that's what they were waiting for. That gave her about four more minutes… Abby grimaced as she twisted her wrists in the bonds. …four minutes was not going to get her anywhere. These ropes weren't fooling around. 

Abby growled and began to rub the ropes up and down the tree. Hopeless or not, Abby was danged if she was gonna just let these pirates steal her lifeforce!

"…und if you vish to also become immortal, step into vun of the circles, und prepare for the process to begin!"

Dang idiots. All they could think about was some curse they were about to be rid of and about their own petty little concerns. Never mind the poor girl they were gonna kill to get it.

Now Heinrich was coming over. What did he want, anyway?

Abby waited until he was within two feet of her and she could not miss before spitting at him. Heinrich recoiled with a displeased but not unpleasant wince before recovering with an infuriating smile. "You realize, mein freund," he said, chucking her neatly under the chin. "That I bear no grudge, once this is complete."

"Heinie, whatta you up to here, anyway!?" Ropes strained and buckled as Abby seethed at her captor. "What're you thinkin' You oughta know better than to… " She snorted, twisting her arms again to get at the knot. "…shucks, even if this works, you're gonna be lucky if they don't take off your head for…"

"Luck, mein dear, has nutting to do vit it." Heinrich smirked. "Und I am not so blind as to not see the dangers of such a thing as I attempt, nor so dull as to miss the advantages of having und immortal group of followers."

"Assuming they follow you." Abby hissed.

Heinrich laughed "As to that," he adjusted his monocle gleefully, "it is not such a…"

_Numbuh 5!_

Abby's head started to snap up, then stopped, realizing something. Slowly, carefully, she lifted her head. Nonchalantly, her eyes began to glance around at the surrounding bushes.

_Numbuh 5! Can you hear me!? Nod your head yes if you can hear me!_

Abby glanced up at Heinrich, still going on about his plan, and gave a begrudging nod.

_Oh good! These ear things still work_! She could almost hear the relief crackling through the static. _Look, this is probably not the best time to talk to you, I know…_

Abby gave a short, irritable nod…

_Yeah,_ _yeah, I know! But… well... okay… I didn't have any better ideas!_ Hoagie's voice seemed a little whiny. _And I wanted to test to see if this worked, so I could work it out! And…_

"…my plan vill vork." Heinrich was back, staring at her with a despicable grin. "Und you vill help me do it."

Abby snapped back into attention. "Yeah, yeah, whatever." She snorted at him. "What makes you think Abby's gonna do it?"

Heinrich eyed her, a trifle puzzled, then laughed. "You haf no choice." He smirked, then strode back to the hill,

Breathing a sigh of relief, Abby bent her attention to the static crackling in her ear.

_So here's the plan…_

* * *

"We should be in range of the island within five minutes, Holy Father." The captain turned to the tall priest. "Once the whole fleet has been drawn up, we can commence full bombardment." 

"Nay." Spinachoza leant far over the railing, pearing at the distant form of land. "Each ship must begin firing as soon as they are in range. We cannot wait for a coordinated barrage." Fiercely he turned to the captain. "Send the word throughout the fleet. They are to commence firing as soon as practical."

The captain's face was momentarily masked by astonishment, but a glare from the priest recalled him to his senses. "Y—yes, holy father."

* * *

The pirates were milling about in nervous groups. Some were joining the chalked circles, others were nervously standing on the verge, and still others were arguing in tight coupled debates. 

The black, skeletal pirates, already gathered in their own circle, stood in an attitude of expectant impatience. Their captain, at the front, looked about, up, and down.

Heinrich von Marzipan, in the center of the turbulent sea of humanity, glanced up at the sky and bit his lip. He looked at his watch a quick moment and his hand groped at his pocket. With a sudden thought, he cast a wary eye toward Abigail.

She was sitting, calm and quiet, against the tree, but her eyes had the look of a caged beast—tensely still, expectant.

Hoagie, some ten feet behind Abby's tree, saw Heinrich study Abby a long moment before turning back to the sky. Slowly, Hoagie raised himself a few inches above the grass, sparing a hasty check to the right. A glimmer of tattered finery among the bushes showed John's position. He checked his pistol, and slowly leveled it with the twisted tangle of licorice that held Abby to the tree.

_This will work._ Hoagie thought, licking his lips. _This has to work._

* * *

Long John Stupid, some yards to Hoagie's right, had all his attention fixed on the pedestal in the middle when he felt a large hand clamp onto his shoulder.

* * *

With a last look at his watch, Heinrich cried aloud and raised his arms, the grotesque seed nesting in his palm. "Ze Moment haf come!" He cried. "Make your choice und choose your fate! 

With a sudden wrench of movement, the sea of pirates separated into a few fear-bound lakes. All stared expectantly at the chubby boy in the centre, the pale moonlight bathing the grandly horrible scene.

"Und now!" Heinrich could not resist a small chuckle as he spoke, arms raised above his head, legs firmly planted, moonight streaming down upon the hill. "Ze ceremony vill…"

In that moment several things happened at once. A cannonball came shrieking down through the air, plowing deep into the hill, knocking Heinrich completely off balance. A rather impressive yell came from the right of the camp, followed shortly by the explosion of Long John Stupid from the brush. The pirates everywhere began to shout and fire pistols.

And Hoagie's pistol jammed.

"Aw, sourballs!" Hoagie threw it aside and leapt up. "Have to go to plan B!"

* * *

Long John Stupid ran straight out into the open, paying no heed to the curses of the pirate behind him. Bullets were whizzing about his ears and all around him he could hear the crashing of trees, shattered by cannon. 

Long John had been supposed to stay where he was, and wait for Abby to break free of the ropes. Long John was supposed to wait until she came running, and then cover her by attacking anyone who came after her.

Long John didn't think he was supposed to be found by Stickybeard just before. He didn't think Abby was supposed to stay right there. He didn't think he was supposed to be out here.

Long John didn't know what to do.

So, on a sudden surge of inspiration, he turned, and charged straight at Black John.

* * *

Abby twisted frantically in her ropes as Hoagie came sprinting up. "What are you playing at, boy!?" She asked, as his celery stalk began to cut through the licorice. "You didn't say nothing about cannonballs!" 

"I didn't expect cannonballs for another two minutes." Hoagie grunted, sawing furiously at the ropes. "Spinachians must've done different then what I thought."

"Oy!" Hoagie's head snapped around to see a huge mass of red hair and lollipops charging toward them.

"Aw, rats." Hoagie deflated.

* * *

The fight with Black John was largely one-sided. Indeed, Long John got the impression that if Black John hadn't been so leery of stepping outside of the chalk circle, the skeletal captain would've beaten him to a pulp. 

As it was, Long John had only gotten socked back three times before he paused to take stock of what was going on. Black John was yelling furiously at Heinrich to get things finished, the pirates were running about or standing stock-still in their circles, cannonballs were still crashing all around…

…and Stickybeard had just emerged from the bushes, and was now running over at the tree where missus Abby and the monk-guy were standing.

Long John hesitated for all of five seconds before struggling to his feet and charging at the hairy captain.

* * *

Hoagie struggled in front of Abby, attempting to assume something like a guarding posture, as the red-haired captain came at them. Just behind them he could vaguely hear a huge disruption, and out of the corner of his eye he could see Heinie stumbling up the hill… 

And all of a sudden John came hurtling through the air, crashing into Stickybeard, and bowling full strength into the tree.

* * *

Slowly the darkness began to clear from Heinrich's eyes as he stumbled up. Shaking the cobwebs from the corners of his mind, he just dimly heard the shouting of Black John through the ringing in his ears. As he rose from the ground, he looked up, and saw the crowd gathered at the tree… 

Realization flashed upon him, and his eyes darkened.

* * *

"Will ye get off me, ye crazy buffoon!?" Stickybeard threw John off him. Cannonballs were still raining down, and Abby was shouting something about the tree. "I'm trying to help ye, by the powers!" 

Hoagie and John blinked at the captain. "Huh?"

"It took me a while to figure it out, but I have, and I'll be hanged if I'll let one of me mateys go like this!" Stickybeard huffed angrily.

Hoagie took a moment to digest this, then nodded and whirled around. "Okay, well, help me out here!"

"Hoagie, guys, get away from the tree!" Abby screamed "The line goes to the tree, the line…"

* * *

…And Heinrich's hand slammed the seed down into the hole.

* * *

A gasp went up from the crowd as the lines flamed into sudden light. They whirled about in runes, they whizzed in circles. The seed glowed with light, the circles gleamed and consumed the pirates inside, and the light of the moon poured down upon the whole. 

And the line reaching to the tree flamed up with green and deadly light. Hoagie, Sticky, Abby, and John, turned as one and gasped as the light shot toward them…

"JOOOOHN!!!" Something tall and dark dashed forward.

The light exploded in a world of green fire.

* * *

"That's a Spinachian ship up ahead alright." Rachel mused, staring through the binoculars. "But as to what they're… Hey!"

"They're bombarding the island." Nigel stated confidently, looking through the snatched pair. "They're trying to destroy everything on it."

"Forget the ships, what's with that light?" Wally made an unsuccessful grab at the binoculars. "The whole cruddy island is lit up!"

Nigel shifted his gaze. "Don't know. Looks like there's something growing at the top of the island, though. They must've…"

He was cut off by an exclamation from Rachel. "Everyone, look at the ships!"

The four operatives stared in disbelief as the distant forms of the ships lurched violently back. Keels lifted clear out of the water, and masts bent backward, breaking like twigs in the face of what looked like a veritable wall of wind gushing out from the isle. The lofty ships swept back, they turned and rolled over in the water, they fell in smashed ruin back onto the waves.

The four operatives could only stare, ringside observers to the destruction of the glorious Spinachian Armada.

* * *

Abby awoke to the sound of sobbing. Somewhere in her mind it occurred to her that she should be hearing cannonfire too, but she could not. She could only hear the crying.

She opened her eyes, trying to focus on the yellow blur above. Slowly it solidified into a very relieved pair of goggles, and from there into a very relieved Hoagie, who helped her into a sitting position.

The desolate smoking hill they had been surrounding a mere moment before was swiftly sprouting red stalks, a thin carpet on the still smoking earth. A few feet away lay two piles of fully human pirates, apparently knocked unconscious by the blast. Stickybeard loomed high above Hoagie, an equally relieved expression on his face.

And a few feet away crouched the trembling jelly of Long John Stupid, huddled over something dark on the ground.

And he was crying.

Abby straightened up, wincing at the pain lancing through her. Hoagie helped her into a seating position, bracing her back against the tree. She looked at him with a question in her eyes, and he nodded to the quivering pirate.

"Jim…" Long John Stupid was saying. "Jim…. What're you… what… don't go, Jim, don't leave me here… not again…"

"_Mi hermano_…" came back the whispered response. Abby blinked, realization gripping her. "You have lived without me for fifteen long years. Surely you learn to live by now, _Verdad_?"

"But… but…" tears were thick on the giant's voice. "But… not without you… I… never really…"

"Silence, _mi hermano_…" A coughing shook the form on the ground. "I sorry to leave you again, but I could not… I could not fail to protect again. I am happy…" Another fit of coughing shook the thin man, and he waited before continuing. "I am happy… that before I die… that I could finally protect my family… as I should…."

Abby straightened to her feet. Hoagie rose beside her, and she leant on his shoulder as they hobbled forward, behind Long John.

"You will do well, my brother…" Amerigo's smile was weak, parched, and his face terribly aged by many thousand years that had not been there before, but he was unmistakeably smiling. "You have strength, and you have friends. You… you will do well…"

John, eyes blurry with tears, could only nod.

"You will do well…" The whisper sighed through the dry lips. "I… always know… you… do… well…"

And the green eyes faded to dark, and the head lolled back onto the ground, and all that could be heard was the feeble sobbing of a gigantic child, who had just found himself.

* * *

**A/N: **Review.Please. The ending is the most important part of the story, if I messed this up, I might have well have skipped the rest, but I'd still like to know. 


	21. Epilogue

::EPILOGUE::

* * *

"Captain Amerigo will be given full honors and buried in the Spinachian grounds." Baruchli Spinachoza pressed the ends of his thin fingers together and pursed his lips. "His brother's request is most unusual, but I foresee no problem with it." 

"It's not even that unusual." Hoagie grunted, shoving the brick into his suitcase. "Shoot, you said you knew his name was James when he signed on, so what's strange about putting that on the tombstone?"

"His family name was James." Baruchli eyed the fat monk as he bustled about the room. "But his christened name was Amerigo, and usually the christened name is the one we put on the headstone."

Hoagie rolled his eyes. "Whatever."

"In any case." Baruchli continued, raising his voice. "There is no direct conflict, so all will be done as his kin desires. And I see there is no gainsaying your decision?"

"Nope." A slight jiggling of the calculator, and the lunchbox squeezed into place. "Actually," Hoagie looked up with a frown. "I'm surprised you want me to stay around. I mean, I destroyed half the Armada."

"And disobeyed a direct command, freed a Spinachian prisoner, and stole a weapon of the Spinachian Armada." Baruchli nodded calmly. "Yes. But you are still a gifted student of the Green Leaf, and most valuable to the Order."

"Oh, I see." Hoagie rolled his eyes again.

"And…" There was a pause as Baruchli worried his lip. "It seems the affair at Licorice Isle was more… complex then I initially believed."

Hoagie turned at the strange tone in the priest's voice. "Huh?"

"Well…" Baruchli stared at his fingers very hard indeed. "You allowed your personal interests to conflict with your duty and failed to think of the greater good involved."

Hoagie nodded. "And, as it happened, the curse did make them immortal. But?"

"But…" A frown creased the edges of Baruchli's face. "It seems I should have been more attentive to the nature of the curse."

"Heh." A grin tugged at Hoagie's mouth. "That was kinda funny. Those guys have gotta be furious with how things went there."

* * *

"Long John's okay." Stickybeard sat on the bunk, watching the small girl run stuff things in her sack. "But he's not going to stay on fer much longer. What with loosin' me best pilot, and half me crew, it'll be awhile afore I can sail the seas again, unless I can pull some kinda job. The curse shook up some of me best men."

"That wuz kinda funny." Abby snickered. "Who woulda thought the curse would turn out like that?"

Stickybeard shrugged, but there was just the faint suggestion of a grin on his face. "It do make sense, when ye think about it. Every curse has a cause, and a condition. Black John caused the curse by taking away the licorice from the island fer himself. It makes sense that the condition'd be that he'd keep the licorice on the island fer others."

"Uh-huh." Abby grinned. "But for the rest of his life! That I didn't see coming. If Black John wants to keep himself human, he needs to stay on that island as a caretaker, to keep someone from doing what he did."

Stickybeard shrugged. "It makes sense."

"Course it does." Abby rolled her eyes. "These curses always do, once you figure em' out." She could not help a chuckle. "But what's really funny is how he's immortal now, he's gonna be stuck guarding a load of candy fer the rest of eternity!"

Stickybeard nodded. "There do be something of a poetic irony in it, especially seein as how neither he nor any of his boys can taste the stuff without tastin' black licorice again." He chuckled, then sobered into a frown. "Though it is a pity how Bubbleosa and the others have to stay behind too."

He cast another thoughtful look at Abby. "Lassie, I know I done ye wrong in more ways than one, but are ye sure ye won't reconsider? We could use an able first mate aboard the Sweet Revenge."

Rolling the caramel necklace into a coil, Abby turned and gave Stickybeard one long, meaningful look.

He sighed. "Yeah. That be what I figured ye'd say."

* * *

"Numbuhs 2 and 5 both respectfully request they not be sent on any more undercover missions for a while." Numbuh 1's face had not the hint of a smile as he handed the mission folder over to Numbuh 362. "Aside from that, they have no issues, and are ready to return to active duty almost immediately." 

"If they want leave time, do let me know." Numbuh 362 nodded calmly as she looked over the paper. "I understand completely." Looking over the edge of the paper, something seemed to shift in her expression as she looked at him, and for a moment the commander slipped away. "Do you have the other paper I asked for?"

This time there _was_ a hint of a smile on Nigel's face as he withdrew a nondescript envelope from his sleeve. "Yes. A non-official account of what happened on the island, from both Numbuh 2 and 5."

"Good." Rachel picked out the envelope and looked at it ruefully. "I'll look through it and write up an official version to keep Global Command happy. Don't know where I'm going to put it after that, though. Can't really even put it in the Black Op archives."

Nigel shrugged. "Put it in your diary."

Rachel stopped and glared at him.

"Well…" He winced and rubbed his neck. "It should be usually safe…"

"Forget it." Numbuh 362 stuck it in with the other papers. "Anyway. It shouldn't take much work to fabricate. The version I told them—that Numbuhs 2 and 5 were just waiting to turn on Spinachian Armada and the Candy Pirates—isn't too far from the truth. And with the results we have here, Global Command shouldn't ask too many questions."

"The Candy Pirates are still there." Nigel pointed out. "Weaker, but still there."

"Yes." 362 nodded. "But on much better terms with us now. And Numbuh Infinity is already drafting a new treaty to work with the Spinach Armada. Operation SEPARATION has met and surpassed its expectations."

* * *

"On the whole." Baruchli looked up from his fingers. "Despite your disobedience, you have far surpassed any expectations we had of you. And…" Baruchli winced as he spoke. "Occasionally, a touch of insubordination is… welcome in the Inquisition." 

Hoagie raised an eyebrow at the priest.

Baruchli coughed as if insulted. "We do not think ourselves infallible, Brother Hoagie. We are prepared to honor opinions other than our own." He brushed his hands on his sleeve. "We encourage respectful dissent among the brethren."

Hoagie smiled and shook his head as he turned back to his work. "Thanks, but no thanks, Father. Even if the brethren would take me back, I really doubt the seamen would ever listen to me, after what I did to the fleet."

"Ah." Baruchli nodded. "True enough. I must ask, though, how that was accomplished. It was a weapon unlike any I'd ever seen, and if you truly mean to leave us, you must at least allow us to continue your work."

"Eeeeeh…" Hoagie thought about that, then shrugged. "It won't help you much anyway. It was just my ship, really. It crashed into the island sideways, and the propellers were facing you guys. I just set the hamsters to run at the right time."

A thin brown eyebrow cocked upwards on the priest's long face. "The propellers must have gone fast indeed to spur a wind of such strength."

"Got me there." Hoagie shrugged again. "I actually didn't think it would do that much, just knock you guys off for a while. I don't know why it reacted like that. The only thing I did different was the stuff I put in the water bottles."

"What did you put in them?" Baruchli looked at him.

Another shrug. "I don't even really know. Some stuff we grabbed from the pirates. It was all green and nasty-looking. They called it Monster, or something."

* * *

"Anyway, you boys still have some booty left over." Abby gave the captain a comforting smile. "The stuff we got from the coffee derrick, and the candy crowns. Ya should be able to keep the boys happy for a while." 

Stickybeard nodded, a trifle unhappily. "Aye, aye…" he sighed. "I know."

"And now, you and whoever didn't go with Heinie's offer can drop by the island and feast on licorice."

Stickybeard's face brightened at this thought. "Aye, that's so. And I still have a few last things that Father gave me. Perhaps there's still something fer old Stickybeard, eh? "

Abby did not reply. In fact, she said nothing more for a few moments. Her hands moved about, mechanically packing away her things into the tiny rucksack, but her eyes were narrowed, and her brow furrowed in thought. From time to time, she glanced over at the huge, silent captain in the corner.

Finally, she said, with a false nonchalance. "So… guess you didn't get those Pearly Whites, after all, didja?"

Stickybeard glanced over at her, slight surprise upon his face. "I thought ye didn't believe in them things."

"I don't." Abby growled. "That's why I'm guessing you didn't get them. That's why Abby thinks you suddenly decided to help us out."

"Eh?" Stickybeard recoiled, askance. "Oh, no, no, lass!" He shook his head, distress tearing across his crumpled face. "I told ye. I did nae know about Heinie's plan to sacrifice ye until a few moments before. That be why I turned like I did."

"And who told ya dat?" Abby eyed the captain.

Stickybeard's face fell at the question. "The skinny Spaniard."

Abby's face fell.

"Oh." She murmured, feeling oddly chastised.

Stickybeard nodded, curling one long red hair around his chubby finger. "I guess he didn't know it fer sure, he was only guessing. But when he said it…" There was something of a silence. "It…. It made too much sense." He looked over at Abby. "And I told ye, I'd never do that to a matey a'mine."

"Hmmmph." Abby went back to packing. "And I'm guessing the Pearly Whites had nuttin' to do with it atall."

Stickybeard growled at her tone. "Missie, I'll have ye know, John _gave_ me the Pearly Whites."

Abby's head snapped around quickly. "What?"

"Ye heard me." Stickybeard glared at her. "When we got to them islands, and Heinie started a-working, Black John took me aside, and gave me the Pearly Whites he'd been a-promisin'"

"B-b-but…" Abby stammered.

"They exist, lassie!" Sticky thundered. "I seen 'em with me own eyes. I very nearly had 'em between me gums, I did. Do ye hear me? I had the Pearly Whites!"

Abby stared at the captain, standing broad and tall above her, a hairy giant. "B-but then…" She swallowed, and looked up at him. "I'm… I'm sorry Stickybun. Abby didn't know dat."

"Arr, don't worry about it lassie." Stickybeard sighed slumping back to a seat. "We each've made our mistakes here."

"But… what'dja do with them?" Abby could hardly hold back the questions. "Do ya have 'em here? What do they look like?"

Stickybeard shook his head, slowly, but without regret. "I gave 'em away, lassie."

Abby stopped. "Ya what?"

"I gave 'em away." Stickybeard frowned. "Even afore I turned to help ya."

"But…" Abby gaped for words. "…why?"

Stickybeard shook his head. "I'm old, lassie. I done my time. It's time fer this pirate to stop living from one sweet to the next."

"Besides…" And here his face crinkled into a grin. "After a while, all the candy would just taste the same again. Ye wouldn't even notice the extra sugar. And I'm not such a fool as to forget what happened to the king who made the things."

Abby stared at the captain, who replied only with his usual smile. "So, whaddaya say, Lassie? Will ye come back as me first mate? Tis not much longer, and I'll be gone as cap'n!"

* * *

Hoagie sat down on top of the suitcase and pushed the latches shut. "So." He smiled at the priest. "That's that. And if you'll just honor my request about that one prisoner…" 

"Actually…" Baruchli frowned. "I have just gotten a report back from the castle. They say that the one 'Tommy' prisoner has disappeared. No one knows where he is anymore."

Hoagie's shoulder's sagged suddenly. "Well, that's just typical." He grumbled. "He'll probably be even more crazy now."

Baruchli raised an eyebrow.

"Never mind." Hoagie shook his head. "Look, I'd better go."

"Once more I must beseech you, brother." Baruchli looked at the young monk, a pained expression on his face. "You are peculiarly gifted. Given time under our tutelage, amidst our libraries, who knows what further wonders you might concoct!" Baruchli folded his hands, pursed his lips. "I beg you, my brother. Reconsider, and return to the Spinach! We still have many secrets to teach you!"

"Secrets?!" Hoagie's head snapped around.

"Many secrets." Baruchli nodded. "Repeating cannons, submarines, works done in genetics and in signal communications. Please, brother Hoagie. You could achieve so much, under us!"

* * *

"You and your team have achieved much, Numbuh 1." 362 smiled at the operative before her. 

"Barely." Numbuh 1 frowned.

"Granted." 362 wondered at 1's tone. He still seemed a little… troubled. Before, such a statement would have sent him into raptures. "But done so nonetheless. You and your team are to be commended for this."

"Very well, ma'am." Nigel nodded.

"Do you have any other requests?"

"Yes." Numbuh 1 raised his head. "May I have some time off before the court-martial?"

"Court-martial?" 362 blinked.

"For my insubordination." Numbuh 1 clarified. "I directly disobeyed an order from a superior officer. When will the court-martial be?"

"Ah." Numbuh 362 started a smile, but managed to stifle it. She had been looking forward to announcing this. "There will be no court martial."

Numbuh 1 raised an eyebrow. "It is not something that can be overlooked, sir…"

"…Unless the officer implicated chooses to overlook it." 362 corrected him. "It's in the rules. I had 65.3 check it over. And as the officer implicated…" this time she did allow herself a small smile. "I have decided to overlook it."

Nigel stared at her. "But… ma'am… commander… sir…" He collected himself. "I thank you very much for the consideration, but I…" He suddenly stopped, thought, then nodded. "Thank you. Thank you very much Rachel."

"Don't worry about it." Rachel shrugged. "Now, do you still want time off? Or, otherwise, I have some missions here that I could give you?!"

* * *

Slowly, decisively, Abby shook her head. "No…" she said. "Naw, thanks, but… Abby's… kinda tired of leading all the time."

* * *

Hoagie thought about it, rubbed his chin, shook his head. "Nah." He said. "I'm… well, I'm a little sick of always following behind. Y'know" he smirked. "always being the Number Two man."

* * *

Nigel's mouth opened in what looked like a yes, then slowly closed, thought, and finally resolved into a frown. He shook his head. 

"I'd like to." He said. "But… well, a friend told me recently that I've been getting too absorbed in the Kids Next Door, and that I should take a look around at my friends."

Rachel studied him, trying to decipher what he meant.

"So…." Nigel shrugged. "I think I'd like to take some time off."

* * *

"I thought ye'd say that." Stickybeard sighed. "Ah well. What'll ye do now, lassie?"

* * *

"Perhaps it is better so, then." Baruchli nodded. "But, what shall you do with your life, my brother?"

* * *

Rachel slowly nodded, her mouth curving in a quiet grin. "I understand." She said. "What are you thinking to use your free time for?"

* * *

"Heinrich." Abby tossed the sack onto her back and tightened the straps. "I gotta find him. There's something of his I need to return." She fingered her necklace. "He ain't on the island, and he's gotten out somehow, but I think I know where he went." She grinned. " I'll find him."

"Ye sure ye want to?" Sticky eyed the small girl. "I mean, the boy did try and kill ya and all..."

Abby looked slightly pained. "Dere's a lot more to that boy then what ya think, Sticky." She shook her head. "Abby don't bear no grudge."

"If ye say so." Sticky stood up. "And in the meantime?"

"I got some catchin' up to do with my friends from Kids Next Door." Abby smiled. "If they'll have me. I made some problems I need to face up to."

Stickybeard returned the smile and extended his arm. "Then, I'll see ye again, lassie."

Abby stuck out her arm and shook it. "See ya, Stickybun. And hey, if ye change your mind about them teeth, try lookin' up Knightbrace. He might be able to do something for ya."

* * *

"Oh," A mischevious grin curved Hoagie's mouth. "I will still serve the Spinach, Holy Father. But I shall serve it in my own way." 

From his sleeve he took a small bottle, filled nearly to the brim with mashed spinach leaves. With a quick movement, he stuck a finger deep into his ear and extracted a gob of wax, which he then shoved down the neck of the bottle.

"It's a project I've been working on for a while." Hoagie smiled. "Since you told me about the way to love Spinach, in fact."

Baruchli arched a questioning eyebrow.

"You see" Hoagie explained. "You say, if people can be made to serve the Spinach out of love, rather than fear, it is all the better, right?" Baruchli nodded and Hoagie continued. "So, I made this!" He indicated the bottle. "I have made a chemical mixture of Spinach that has rather remarkable properties. I hope to release it to the Kids Next Door at the upcoming science convention. If it goes over well…" He smiled. "The name of Spinach shall be spread all the more."

"I see." Baruchli nodded, a slow smile on his thin lips. "So… instead of bringing the people to the Spinach, you will bring the people to the Spinach."

"Something like that." Hoagie nodded. "Probably'll only work on kids, though. Tastes like Boogers."

"I approve." Baruchli Spinachoza stood. "Godspeed, Brother Hoagie."

"And to you, Holy Father."

"I have told you," Baruchli opened the door for his friend. "Do not call me that. No one is holy, save Spinach."

* * *

Nigel looked down at the ground. "I think I should take my girlfriend Lizzie out somewhere." 

"Oh." 362 stopped. She bit her lip. "Yes, that's a good idea."

"Yeah, well…" Nigel rubbed the back of his neck, in that embarrassed way he had when speaking about his girlfriend "It's been a while since I've done much of anything with her, what with all the stuff in the KND. I should pay more attention to her."

"Yes." 362 nodded, then nodded again, more emphatically. "Yes, that's a good idea."

"And maybe after that I should have Numbuh 2 overhaul the computer." Nigel chuckled. "I think I might have used it a little too much trying to track the pirates. It's been acting funny."

"Good idea." 362 nodded again. "Yes, by all means."

"And…" Nigel frowned a moment. "Maybe I can get the sector just to hang out at the soda place." He shrugged as he turned to leave. "It's been a while since we all relaxed and just talked, and I think we could all use it."

"Yes." Rachel nodded, turning to go up to her chair. "Yes, your team should take some time off, definitely."

* * *

The silence in the rocket was rather awkward. Finally, Abby sighed and leaned forward. "Thanks for coming to pick me up, Hoagie." 

Hoagie looked over from the control panel. "Nigel gave me the SCAMPER. I figured I might as well pick you up on the way back to the treehouse. And…"

"That's not what Abby meant." Abby frowned at him. "And you know it."

Hoagie's eyes twirled upwards in bewilderment. "Huh?"

"Abby insulted ya. Called ya all sorts of names. Told ya to get lost. And ya still came after her." Abby frowned down at her peppermint dagger. "It… and… ya came just trying to help… not cause Abby was part of the team or anythin'" She shrugged. "So… thanks."

Hoagie looked at her, confused. "Uh… Well…. It wasn't anything… I mean, Tommy does stuff like that all the time, and I don't…"

"Hoagie." Abby closed her eyes. "Just shut up and say you're welcome."

* * *

"Oh, and Rachel…?" 

Rachel turned on the stairs. "Yes?"

Nigel was standing just in the doors, half-turned himself. "If you or Patton get a spare moment, you should… y'know…" He gestured a little awkwardly. "…come and drop by with us at the soda bar, or something."

Rachel stared at him.

"Well…" Nigel rubbed the back of his neck in an embarrassed manner. "You know. It's been a while since you and Abby have had a good talk."

Rachel nodded, slowly. "Perhaps I will, Nigel."

END TRANSMISSION...

* * *

A/N: THE END! Please Review! 


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